WEBVTT
00:00:01.040 --> 00:00:03.919
Oh my god, I just totally got catfished.
00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.080
He looks absolutely nothing like his picture.
00:00:06.320 --> 00:00:11.039
So I found out the guy that I've been dating is married with kids.
00:00:11.279 --> 00:00:13.679
His wife just reached out to me.
00:00:15.119 --> 00:00:16.239
Welcome to the meat market.
00:00:16.480 --> 00:00:19.519
The single scene is a slaughterhouse, and we are here to devour it.
00:00:19.600 --> 00:00:20.160
We are your hosts.
00:00:20.239 --> 00:00:20.879
I'm Lindsay.
00:00:20.960 --> 00:00:21.440
I'm Jess.
00:00:21.519 --> 00:00:23.679
And today's sizzling single is Maddie.
00:00:23.760 --> 00:00:24.239
Welcome.
00:00:24.559 --> 00:00:24.879
Thank you.
00:00:24.960 --> 00:00:25.839
Thank you for having me.
00:00:26.079 --> 00:00:28.000
So you run a singles club.
00:00:28.239 --> 00:00:28.719
I do.
00:00:28.960 --> 00:00:33.280
What do you think, in your opinion, is the number one problem with singles nowadays?
00:00:35.200 --> 00:00:36.159
She's like, where do I start?
00:00:36.399 --> 00:00:37.679
No, no, literally.
00:00:37.840 --> 00:00:42.640
Um the number one problem with singles nowadays, ooh, that's such a good question.
00:00:42.719 --> 00:00:52.560
Because I feel like what I do is so based on meeting in person and getting rid of the apps that I feel like that's my answer, is that everybody's so reliant on meeting online.
00:00:53.200 --> 00:01:06.400
But I think generally, I think everybody's expectations are very high of what they want in a partner and what maybe what they can offer.
00:01:06.560 --> 00:01:08.239
And it's like unrealistic.
00:01:08.400 --> 00:01:14.640
I feel like social media has kind of fed into this unrealistic standard of how it's supposed to be.
00:01:14.719 --> 00:01:19.040
And I feel I can see that a lot in the people that come to my events for sure.
00:01:19.359 --> 00:01:26.000
Well, it's like all women want someone that's six foot and above, but like one percent of the population is taller than six foot, something like that.
00:01:26.159 --> 00:01:26.560
So yeah.
00:01:26.719 --> 00:01:31.599
Well, and all the guys want the Instagram model, but they don't realize that the Instagram model's photos are Photoshop.
00:01:31.680 --> 00:01:33.280
It's all filtered in photos are photos.
00:01:34.799 --> 00:01:36.319
No one actually looks like that in real life.
00:01:36.560 --> 00:01:36.959
Right, exactly.
00:01:37.280 --> 00:01:37.760
That's kind of true.
00:01:37.840 --> 00:01:45.680
That's gotta skew society when men are seeing all these pictures on Instagram that are all filtered, so then when they meet people in real life, they're like, oh no, no, no, no.
00:01:45.760 --> 00:01:47.439
They're waiting for that perfect filter.
00:01:47.920 --> 00:01:56.400
And not only filtered, but face-tuned to where you can literally like snip in the waist, oh yeah, you know, like bring out the hips, bring out the buttons.
00:01:56.480 --> 00:02:02.959
Like you can create, you can take your photo of your body and completely give yourself like plastic surgery.
00:02:03.120 --> 00:02:03.760
And with anything.
00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:11.919
And even do like the face swapping too, where it's like, yeah, it's your face technically, but they use like a system to make it like a better smile.
00:02:12.479 --> 00:02:12.719
AI.
00:02:12.879 --> 00:02:16.000
They use AI to like give you a better look.
00:02:16.319 --> 00:02:19.280
Yeah, or to do a hair, like to do your hairstyle.
00:02:19.680 --> 00:02:20.560
You can add hair.
00:02:20.960 --> 00:02:22.080
And it looks so natural too.
00:02:22.479 --> 00:02:27.759
Aren't these people though mortified when they go to meet someone in person, knowing that they look nothing like their pictures?
00:02:27.919 --> 00:02:28.639
Aren't they embarrassed?
00:02:28.800 --> 00:02:29.360
I mean, obviously not.
00:02:29.680 --> 00:02:35.599
You would think, I think they're just maybe delusional a little bit, or they're hoping that the other person doesn't notice.
00:02:35.759 --> 00:02:36.319
Oh my god.
00:02:36.960 --> 00:02:37.360
All right.
00:02:37.520 --> 00:02:41.919
Like so you throw events, because I know you're a proponent of meeting in person, not online.
00:02:42.159 --> 00:02:43.439
So tell us about your events.
00:02:43.680 --> 00:02:46.800
Yeah, I work with a company called Thursday Dating.
00:02:46.879 --> 00:02:56.960
It's a company that's based in London in the UK, but we do uh we're in, I want to say it's like 92 or 95 cities around the world.
00:02:57.120 --> 00:02:58.800
So I brought it here to Phoenix.
00:02:58.879 --> 00:03:01.039
I'm the organizer, the host of the events.
00:03:01.199 --> 00:03:06.560
We do weekly events around Phoenix, around the valley for singles to meet.
00:03:06.639 --> 00:03:08.479
It's basically singles mixers.
00:03:08.719 --> 00:03:14.639
Um, and it's just a space for like kind of creating an intentional space for people to meet.
00:03:14.800 --> 00:03:23.120
Like our thing is just a bar everyone's single, where you know you might want to go out to a bar and meet somebody, but you don't know if they're single or not.
00:03:23.199 --> 00:03:28.560
We kind of take that guesswork away of like, here's everybody that's single in this bar.
00:03:28.800 --> 00:03:29.840
Come meet them.
00:03:30.080 --> 00:03:32.719
So what age range would you say you have?
00:03:33.039 --> 00:03:39.520
I would say our typical age range is anywhere from 25 to 40 that come to our events.
00:03:39.680 --> 00:03:44.800
I do occasional 35 and up events, those range from 35 to 60.
00:03:45.039 --> 00:03:46.400
So it's a pretty wide range of people that have.
00:03:46.800 --> 00:03:48.080
How many people attend?
00:03:48.560 --> 00:03:49.280
About a hundred.
00:03:49.520 --> 00:03:49.919
Oh wow.
00:03:50.080 --> 00:03:50.960
That's a good turnout.
00:03:51.360 --> 00:03:52.319
What's the feedback?
00:03:52.479 --> 00:03:56.080
Like, what do you ever get any weird complaints?
00:03:56.719 --> 00:04:02.080
Yeah, I mean, I deal with so many comments, positive and negative.
00:04:02.319 --> 00:04:14.479
Um I feel like I get everything from, ooh, one I got recently was this guy commented on my TikTok and he said, You just pay the women to come to the events, they're all models.
00:04:14.639 --> 00:04:20.319
And I was like, Ooh, I don't do that, of course, because that's crazy.
00:04:20.480 --> 00:04:22.079
I don't have the budget to do that.
00:04:22.240 --> 00:04:25.439
But I'm like, that doesn't seem like a terrible feedback.
00:04:25.680 --> 00:04:27.360
You're just like, no, all the women are beautiful.
00:04:27.839 --> 00:04:28.480
Yeah, exactly.
00:04:28.720 --> 00:04:31.839
Yeah, so that's but was he salty because none of the women were interested in the event.
00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:32.959
I think so, yes.
00:04:33.120 --> 00:04:39.519
And it's like a bit of a skill issue on that one, then if you're thinking like no one wants to talk to you because they're paid.
00:04:39.600 --> 00:04:41.839
It's like are these events all around town?
00:04:41.920 --> 00:04:43.439
Are they on the west side, east side?
00:04:43.839 --> 00:04:48.319
They are typically in Phoenix, downtown Phoenix, uptown Phoenix.
00:04:48.480 --> 00:04:49.920
I do go around the valley.
00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:52.000
I've done one event in Glendale.
00:04:52.079 --> 00:04:56.720
That's the only event I've done on the West Side, but the east side has a lot more demand, East Valley.
00:04:56.800 --> 00:05:00.079
So I try to go to Mesa Chandler Gilbert at least once a month.
00:05:00.240 --> 00:05:02.560
So is it always in a bar?
00:05:02.959 --> 00:05:03.600
Not always.
00:05:03.759 --> 00:05:03.920
Okay.
00:05:04.160 --> 00:05:08.240
No, we've done coffee shops, we've done fitness events as well.
00:05:08.399 --> 00:05:10.160
Um, do people pay to show up?
00:05:10.399 --> 00:05:10.720
Yes.
00:05:10.959 --> 00:05:11.279
Okay.
00:05:11.680 --> 00:05:13.680
Have you ever dated someone that's shown up?
00:05:13.920 --> 00:05:14.480
I have, yes.
00:05:14.879 --> 00:05:15.680
Many times.
00:05:16.000 --> 00:05:17.279
I wouldn't say many.
00:05:18.319 --> 00:05:18.879
A few.
00:05:19.040 --> 00:05:25.920
Yeah, I've definitely met some guys at the events that uh you end up going on a date and then they just keep coming to your events.
00:05:26.160 --> 00:05:30.879
I was just gonna ask that if you have like repeats, like people that keep coming and coming.
00:05:31.199 --> 00:05:33.920
Yeah, I do have as far as regular guests go, yes.
00:05:34.079 --> 00:05:41.279
I have at any given event, I would say anywhere from 25 to 30 percent people have been to an event before, up to 50%.
00:05:41.680 --> 00:05:43.600
I recognize a lot of people that come.
00:05:43.839 --> 00:05:49.519
As far as dating them goes, yes, all the guys that have dated still come to the event.
00:05:49.759 --> 00:05:50.560
Oh my gosh.
00:05:50.720 --> 00:05:52.240
So you see them still.
00:05:52.720 --> 00:05:53.920
Yeah, which is fine.
00:05:54.079 --> 00:05:57.040
There's no bad blood between me and any of them, it's just funny.
00:05:57.279 --> 00:05:58.240
I just think it's funny.
00:05:58.560 --> 00:05:59.199
That it's funny.
00:05:59.360 --> 00:06:03.839
Have you ever had anything crazy happen at an event or after an event?
00:06:04.480 --> 00:06:13.120
Um, I mean, crazy hosting nights out, especially the range of crazy that you see is so wide.
00:06:13.439 --> 00:06:14.959
People get too drunk.
00:06:15.040 --> 00:06:16.079
I've seen that.
00:06:16.160 --> 00:06:19.199
I've seen people, you know, pee themselves.
00:06:19.600 --> 00:06:20.240
No way.
00:06:21.680 --> 00:06:22.079
Yeah.
00:06:22.240 --> 00:06:25.199
Um have you had any like hardcore makeout sessions?
00:06:25.439 --> 00:06:25.839
Yes.
00:06:26.240 --> 00:06:26.720
Yes.
00:06:26.879 --> 00:06:32.639
Uh I have had some events, and it's always kind of the same type of venues.
00:06:32.879 --> 00:06:34.000
I don't know why.
00:06:34.160 --> 00:06:39.519
I don't want to like call it out, but it's always at the same venue where people are making out everywhere.
00:06:39.759 --> 00:06:51.600
I saw there was one event where in particular there were two couples that obviously met there, and there were like these booths at the events or at the bar.
00:06:52.560 --> 00:07:00.800
And this couple was right in the front where everybody's coming and going in this booth, just going for it.
00:07:01.040 --> 00:07:07.120
Just like hands, like it was exhibitionists, it was crazy.
00:07:07.360 --> 00:07:10.399
Everyone that was walking by them was like, Are you gonna stop that?
00:07:10.639 --> 00:07:12.240
I'm like, I don't think I can.
00:07:12.399 --> 00:07:13.759
Like, what are you gonna do?
00:07:13.920 --> 00:07:16.079
Like, they're not naked.
00:07:16.160 --> 00:07:17.680
Like, they're like, see, we have a crisis.
00:07:18.720 --> 00:07:21.439
They're not gonna have to be illegal, I guess.
00:07:21.759 --> 00:07:27.199
No, yeah, there's no nudity, there's nothing I can't really do anything.
00:07:27.360 --> 00:07:29.439
Um, did hear a follow-up from that?
00:07:29.600 --> 00:07:31.600
Uh, the guy came to another event.
00:07:31.680 --> 00:07:35.680
They did end up going out to his car and hooking up and then coming back in.
00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:37.199
Oh my god.
00:07:37.839 --> 00:07:38.399
Funny.
00:07:38.560 --> 00:07:39.199
That's funny.
00:07:39.519 --> 00:07:43.759
At the same event, there was another girl straddling a guy making out, which was fun.
00:07:43.920 --> 00:07:44.160
Wow.
00:07:44.399 --> 00:07:45.199
I knew him too.
00:07:45.279 --> 00:07:46.160
I was like, really?
00:07:46.800 --> 00:07:47.839
Get it together.
00:07:48.160 --> 00:07:50.879
Do you ever play matchmaker at these events?
00:07:51.040 --> 00:07:54.000
Like I the with like the regulars, the ones that you've got to know a little bit.
00:07:54.319 --> 00:07:54.560
Of course.
00:07:54.639 --> 00:07:56.800
I do host matchmaking events once a month.
00:07:56.959 --> 00:08:00.800
Those are more, that's more like formal matchmaking where people take a quiz.
00:08:01.040 --> 00:08:04.319
But as far as introducing people to each other, oh yeah, yeah, I do.
00:08:04.480 --> 00:08:11.439
Because people, I mean, as the host, people come to me and say, This is my type, and there's none of those people here.
00:08:11.600 --> 00:08:16.800
And I'm like, okay, well, maybe looks-wise, like what personality are you looking for?
00:08:16.879 --> 00:08:23.199
And it's like, oh, I actually know somebody that's kind of like that, and then you can introduce them and see them talk all night.
00:08:23.519 --> 00:08:23.920
Nice.
00:08:24.480 --> 00:08:27.120
What advice would you give to singles nowadays?
00:08:27.519 --> 00:08:30.560
Do you have any be more open-minded?
00:08:30.879 --> 00:08:43.679
I think a lot of things that I see just from talking to the guests at my events is that they have this perfect person in mind and they are unwilling to like compromise.
00:08:44.240 --> 00:08:47.039
Yes, exactly, compromise for anything other than that.
00:08:47.200 --> 00:08:51.039
You know, if it's a woman, she might want a guy that's 6'2, nothing less.
00:08:51.200 --> 00:08:58.639
And it's like, well, if you're 5'2, wanting a 6'2 man, 5'11 is not that far off.
00:08:59.279 --> 00:09:00.480
Maybe consider that.
00:09:01.039 --> 00:09:12.879
Like, same thing with men, you know, they want a woman that looks like this, and it's like, okay, maybe consider a brunette with highlights instead of a blonde or something like that.
00:09:13.279 --> 00:09:17.759
Because we had a guest on that she she was so specific with her requirements.
00:09:17.919 --> 00:09:21.440
Like, he has to make at least three million a year, he has to be at least this top.
00:09:21.679 --> 00:09:22.240
Remember that girl?
00:09:22.320 --> 00:09:25.840
And it's like, is she ever gonna find someone that fits all that criteria?
00:09:25.919 --> 00:09:28.720
But she was like set, like, no, absolutely not, I will not.
00:09:28.879 --> 00:09:29.840
And it's just crazy.
00:09:30.159 --> 00:09:31.919
Yeah, but she was also doing like ho shit.
00:09:32.159 --> 00:09:41.360
So it's like, I feel like you can't, unless you're that perfect person that you're looking for, you can't expect that.
00:09:41.519 --> 00:09:51.279
Well, and that's what I'm saying to be perfect, and and that person is never gonna come into your life when you haven't done the work and you're not putting out that energy that you're looking to take out.
00:09:51.759 --> 00:09:52.639
But that's what I'm saying.
00:09:52.799 --> 00:09:56.480
Like at some point, don't you want to be like, okay, I don't want to end up alone.
00:09:56.639 --> 00:09:59.840
I need to kind of compromise and lower my standards.
00:10:00.159 --> 00:10:04.480
Not lower your standards, but like you said, maybe don't require six foot two, maybe go down to five eleven.
00:10:04.799 --> 00:10:05.120
Exactly.
00:10:05.360 --> 00:10:05.679
I don't know.
00:10:05.919 --> 00:10:06.159
Yeah.
00:10:06.399 --> 00:10:21.759
It's I feel like just being we get these uh check boxes and uh you want somebody that checks every box, and at some point you need to, you know, review it and be like, actually, these 30 things, maybe not all of them are necessary.
00:10:22.720 --> 00:10:25.519
Do people sign up before they come?
00:10:25.679 --> 00:10:28.320
Like, is it like a pre-registry thing?
00:10:28.639 --> 00:10:34.000
And do they fill out anything, like any sort of questionnaire or anything beforehand?
00:10:34.480 --> 00:10:38.799
For our singles mixers, yeah, you can pre-register, you can buy your ticket online.
00:10:39.039 --> 00:10:42.879
We also offer them at the door for just a standard mixer.
00:10:42.960 --> 00:10:45.600
We just ask for gender and date of birth.
00:10:45.919 --> 00:10:48.960
Um, not anything crazy other than that.
00:10:49.200 --> 00:10:53.679
For a matchmaking events, we do a whole questionnaire.
00:10:53.759 --> 00:11:04.480
It's usually about 40 to 45 questions, and that's all about you, what you're looking for, your lifestyle, what you want in a partner.
00:11:04.879 --> 00:11:11.440
So have you ever seen someone's application come through on the matchmaking side and been like, oh, I want you for myself?
00:11:11.679 --> 00:11:12.720
And like set them aside.
00:11:12.960 --> 00:11:15.120
I feel like that's something I totally do.
00:11:15.600 --> 00:11:17.039
I can never be a matchmaker.
00:11:17.279 --> 00:11:19.759
I don't uh I don't have access to guests' answers.
00:11:19.919 --> 00:11:20.320
Oh, you don't?
00:11:20.559 --> 00:11:22.879
I use like it's a digital matchmaking service.
00:11:23.039 --> 00:11:32.480
So they sign up, I see their name, I can see if they've completed the questionnaire, but I can't see their answers unless I were to submit myself for matchmaking.
00:11:32.639 --> 00:11:32.960
Gotcha.
00:11:33.120 --> 00:11:35.919
And I would get matched with somebody, but you still wouldn't see their answers.
00:11:36.159 --> 00:11:36.480
Okay.
00:11:36.720 --> 00:11:40.960
So you just partner with a matchmaking agency, you don't actually work for the matchmaking.
00:11:41.360 --> 00:11:42.000
We use a service.
00:11:42.080 --> 00:11:42.240
Okay.
00:11:42.480 --> 00:11:43.440
It's called matchbox.
00:11:43.519 --> 00:11:48.159
It's uh like an online matchmaking uh algorithm.
00:11:48.559 --> 00:11:51.840
Didn't you have someone that recommended a single for the show for the meat market?
00:11:51.919 --> 00:11:54.559
And you were like, actually, I want them for myself.
00:11:56.159 --> 00:11:58.720
Because I never date someone that that comes on here.
00:11:59.039 --> 00:12:00.480
Like I'd never date a guest.
00:12:00.720 --> 00:12:04.080
And so I was talking to my friend and she was like, oh my gosh, no, I have this guy.
00:12:04.159 --> 00:12:06.799
And she's like, but actually, and she said it first.
00:12:07.039 --> 00:12:10.080
She was like, actually, she's like, you might kind of like him.
00:12:10.240 --> 00:12:15.039
And so I told her, I said, if you think I would like him, do not send him to be on the show.
00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:17.679
Because if he comes on the show, like it's not happening.
00:12:18.159 --> 00:12:18.639
So yeah.
00:12:18.960 --> 00:12:33.120
There have been times where that has happened with me, where I'll check a guest in and I will make sure, like, when I'm checking them and I can see their name, I'm like, okay, John, I gotta make sure I take 15 minutes and talk to him.
00:12:33.279 --> 00:12:36.159
Like I have I have first pick in that way.
00:12:37.120 --> 00:12:40.480
So statistically, they say there are more singles nowadays than ever.
00:12:40.720 --> 00:12:44.240
The marriage rate's gone down, you know, more people are single than in relationships.
00:12:44.320 --> 00:12:45.679
Why do you think that is?
00:12:46.799 --> 00:12:48.320
That's a really good question.
00:12:48.480 --> 00:13:01.759
I think with kind of the advent of dating apps has kind of led to this idea that people think that they have a million choices, when in reality they probably don't.
00:13:02.399 --> 00:13:06.960
They're probably their chances probably aren't as you know, as grand as they think that they are.
00:13:07.120 --> 00:13:12.960
But the idea of having other options, I think, is leading people to stay single for longer.
00:13:14.080 --> 00:13:14.720
Well, it's true.
00:13:14.799 --> 00:13:22.320
It's so it's um deceiving because I read that the top 10% of men on dating apps get all the dates.
00:13:22.559 --> 00:13:24.960
Then you have that 90% that aren't even getting dates.
00:13:25.120 --> 00:13:31.039
So men think they have all these options, but unless you're in that top 10%, you're screwed, or not screwed, I should say.
00:13:32.879 --> 00:13:36.320
So um, what would it take for a guy to land you?
00:13:37.039 --> 00:13:37.360
Me?
00:13:37.919 --> 00:13:38.720
Oh my god.
00:13:38.879 --> 00:13:43.120
I feel like I don't have very high standards.
00:13:43.840 --> 00:13:46.399
Like it's been long enough that I've been single.
00:13:46.480 --> 00:13:49.840
I'm like, I'll take anybody, which is not true, obviously.
00:13:50.159 --> 00:13:52.159
I feel like at this point, just be nice to me.
00:13:52.399 --> 00:13:52.960
No, really.
00:13:55.120 --> 00:13:56.879
I was thinking about it before coming on.
00:13:56.960 --> 00:14:03.759
I'm like, honesty, loyalty, and I'm like, those are so basic things to want in a partner.
00:14:03.840 --> 00:14:19.039
Um like you feel like you shouldn't have to say that that's what you want in a partner, but it's we're at a point where you actually have to say, no, I want to be with someone who's honest, I want to be with someone who's loyal, I want to be with someone who values family.
00:14:19.279 --> 00:14:22.720
Like, and it's like we shouldn't have to say that those are the things that we want.
00:14:23.039 --> 00:14:23.360
Exactly.
00:14:23.519 --> 00:14:24.799
They should just be given.
00:14:25.039 --> 00:14:25.279
Yeah.
00:14:25.519 --> 00:14:30.799
No, you you do have to clarify you would like honesty in a relationship now.
00:14:31.120 --> 00:14:32.320
Um, I don't know.
00:14:32.399 --> 00:14:36.159
I look, I look for guys that are motivated.
00:14:36.320 --> 00:14:38.559
I like guys that are stable in their careers.
00:14:39.200 --> 00:14:41.679
I tend to go for guys that are in like STEM.
00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:48.960
I think I'm just nerdy in that way that I like I like somebody that can like tinker with electronics or something.
00:14:49.039 --> 00:14:50.639
I find that very attractive.
00:14:51.600 --> 00:14:53.519
Looks-wise, I don't really have a type.
00:14:53.840 --> 00:14:55.360
What do you have deal breakers?
00:14:56.080 --> 00:14:57.279
Deal breakers?
00:14:58.399 --> 00:14:59.519
That's a good question.
00:14:59.679 --> 00:15:10.000
I think any guy that has kids, um if they're I also have been thinking about that lately because I met a guest that has a son.
00:15:10.240 --> 00:15:15.360
I'm like, oh, okay, his son is six or seven out of the baby and toddler phase.
00:15:16.240 --> 00:15:18.799
That I see that would be appealing.
00:15:18.960 --> 00:15:22.159
Um does he have a good relationship with the mother?
00:15:22.559 --> 00:15:23.679
That's a good question.
00:15:24.000 --> 00:15:24.960
I haven't talked to him this time.
00:15:25.360 --> 00:15:27.679
I feel like that can make or break dating someone with a kid, right?
00:15:28.159 --> 00:15:30.320
Like drama with your baby mom.
00:15:30.480 --> 00:15:32.080
Ooh, yeah, that would be a deal breaker.
00:15:32.159 --> 00:15:32.799
Yeah, that would be a dealer.
00:15:38.720 --> 00:15:40.960
I will consider dating someone with kids.
00:15:41.120 --> 00:15:44.320
But I don't want to do the toddler stage again, like you said.
00:15:44.480 --> 00:15:51.679
Like I dated a guy that had he had a two-year-old when we met, and it was fine, it worked, but I don't want to do that again.
00:15:51.759 --> 00:15:51.840
Yeah.
00:15:53.120 --> 00:16:00.000
Yeah, I think that's exactly how I feel too, is like I've never dated anybody with kids, but just that toddler stage.
00:16:00.159 --> 00:16:01.279
I've I'm scared of it.
00:16:01.440 --> 00:16:02.240
Like, I don't know.
00:16:02.399 --> 00:16:14.080
Well, and no matter even if they say they have a great relationship with the mother, usually before the age of like five or six, it's too soon for them to have a good relationship with each other.
00:16:14.240 --> 00:16:19.120
And so I was bamboozled in that way a little bit because it was like, oh yeah, we're great.
00:16:19.200 --> 00:16:20.000
We co-parent.
00:16:20.080 --> 00:16:22.320
And then it was like the first time I ever met the mother.
00:16:22.480 --> 00:16:27.120
It was like, whoa, you guys do not have a good relationship with oh yeah.
00:16:27.279 --> 00:16:28.080
Oh my god.
00:16:29.039 --> 00:16:31.039
Have you ever walked out mid-date?
00:16:31.919 --> 00:16:33.200
No, I don't think I ever have.
00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:38.080
I've definitely wanted to, but I've never I've never done it myself.
00:16:40.320 --> 00:16:41.279
A little bit, yeah.
00:16:41.519 --> 00:16:43.519
I use hinge, that's pretty much it.
00:16:43.759 --> 00:16:44.000
Okay.
00:16:44.159 --> 00:16:44.320
Yeah.
00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:49.200
So would you say that between the apps and your events, is that sort of how you meet people?
00:16:49.759 --> 00:16:50.159
Yeah.
00:16:50.399 --> 00:17:02.240
Um, I was just kind of talking to some of my friends about the uh some of my coworkers, other hosts in other cities about this, and doing our like dating raft, just kind of talking through it.
00:17:02.480 --> 00:17:04.960
Um, I've met one guy off the app this year.
00:17:05.359 --> 00:17:10.640
The rest, you know, a dozen or so have been either at my events or through friends in person.
00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:16.160
I feel like I do I've been on the apps forever, it feels like.
00:17:16.480 --> 00:17:23.599
Um and I do primarily meet people on the apps, but now that I have the dating events, I don't need them as much.
00:17:24.079 --> 00:17:28.720
Where do you think if someone wants to meet someone out in the wild, where is a good place to go to meet singles?
00:17:29.680 --> 00:17:30.880
That's a really good question.
00:17:31.039 --> 00:17:33.200
I was actually, there was a study that was just done.
00:17:33.359 --> 00:17:39.680
I can't remember who it was by, but both men and women responded, and the highest one was at a bar.
00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:40.240
Really?
00:17:40.640 --> 00:17:41.039
At a bar.
00:17:41.359 --> 00:17:41.519
Still.
00:17:42.160 --> 00:17:46.799
I think it's just everybody knows they're there to socialize anyway, and so they're mostly.
00:17:47.039 --> 00:17:48.400
Alcohol so people are a little more relaxed.
00:17:48.640 --> 00:17:50.640
And alcohol is like a social lubricant.
00:17:50.720 --> 00:17:51.200
Yeah.
00:17:51.440 --> 00:17:54.240
Um, men's number two was at the gym.
00:17:54.880 --> 00:17:57.279
Women's bottom of the list was the gym.
00:17:58.000 --> 00:17:59.039
How funny.
00:17:59.680 --> 00:18:12.559
Um, but I think definitely like a social situation like a bar or uh like a run club, if you're in like a group, a social group like that, or a hobby group.
00:18:12.640 --> 00:18:14.559
I think those are a really great way to meet people too.
00:18:14.880 --> 00:18:17.440
I hear pickleball is really a really good way to meet people.
00:18:17.680 --> 00:18:20.079
Oh my gosh, the pickleball courts by my house.
00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:22.880
I went, when did we go?
00:18:22.960 --> 00:18:24.240
It was a holiday day.
00:18:24.799 --> 00:18:26.720
Um, it was last year.
00:18:26.880 --> 00:18:28.559
It was one of the three-day weekend holidays.
00:18:28.640 --> 00:18:30.640
It was either Labor Day or Memorial Day, I think.
00:18:30.880 --> 00:18:38.160
Um, and I went with a couple of friends of mine, and there was like 80 racket.
00:18:38.559 --> 00:18:43.839
You know how they put the you put the paddle in the thing to like say where you are in line, like to say if you have a court.
00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:46.160
There was like 80 paddles.
00:18:46.319 --> 00:18:48.559
Like it was gonna take us like two hours to get away.
00:18:48.720 --> 00:18:50.480
How do we know when your time's up?
00:18:50.799 --> 00:18:53.039
The paddles, your paddle will be take the paddle in the middle.
00:18:53.119 --> 00:18:53.519
The first in line.
00:18:53.599 --> 00:18:55.279
Yeah, you're no, but how long do you play for?
00:18:55.359 --> 00:18:56.240
Like how play a game.
00:18:56.480 --> 00:18:57.119
Oh, just the game.
00:18:57.200 --> 00:18:57.920
Yeah, okay, yeah.
00:18:58.079 --> 00:19:01.119
Yeah, yeah, or how fast it depends.
00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:01.920
It's scored to two.
00:19:02.240 --> 00:19:03.039
Depends on how good you are.
00:19:03.279 --> 00:19:03.839
Yeah, true.
00:19:04.000 --> 00:19:05.039
I know nothing about pickleballs.
00:19:05.119 --> 00:19:06.000
Yeah, it depends.
00:19:06.160 --> 00:19:11.839
But we we ended up just like hitting the balls around a little bit and then leaving because it was gonna be like two hours.
00:19:12.079 --> 00:19:17.839
And there's and it's it was a lot of young people, so I can see pickleball being a good pickleball is a big one.
00:19:18.079 --> 00:19:23.039
Anyone that I talk to, especially at my events, what's your hobby?
00:19:23.279 --> 00:19:24.079
Do you have any hobbies?
00:19:24.240 --> 00:19:26.160
Pickleball is always and I'm the same.
00:19:26.319 --> 00:19:28.319
I'm in, I love playing pickleball.
00:19:28.400 --> 00:19:30.960
I think it's so fun, and it is a great way to meet guys.
00:19:31.680 --> 00:19:33.519
I think I witnessed a first date last night.
00:19:33.680 --> 00:19:35.599
Now that I'm thinking about it, we're talking about it.
00:19:35.759 --> 00:19:41.440
So outside my yoga studio, there's a little bar, like in the same um, in the same complex.
00:19:41.680 --> 00:19:48.240
And so I was leaving yoga and it was like eight ish, and there was this guy, and he was standing outside in front of the bar, and he looked so nervous.
00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:51.759
He kept like ruffling his hair and he was pacing back and forth.
00:19:51.920 --> 00:19:54.160
Like, and I was like, is that guy on something?
00:19:54.319 --> 00:19:55.039
What is going on?
00:19:55.279 --> 00:19:57.759
I then I was like, no, I think he's just really nervous.
00:19:58.000 --> 00:20:06.799
And as I was walking to my car, This girl gets out of a car and locks it, and she started fluffing her hair like she was nervous too.
00:20:07.039 --> 00:20:08.640
And I was like, Oh, that's so cute.
00:20:08.799 --> 00:20:11.759
And then when she started walking up, he started walking towards her.
00:20:12.079 --> 00:20:14.319
And they were like meeting each other and then going inside.
00:20:14.400 --> 00:20:15.200
It was really cute.
00:20:15.440 --> 00:20:15.599
Yeah.
00:20:16.000 --> 00:20:16.640
Oh, how cute.
00:20:16.799 --> 00:20:22.160
Although I don't think this bar would be a good place to meet people, like if you weren't going there.
00:20:22.400 --> 00:20:25.359
If you weren't meeting there and already going for a day.
00:20:25.519 --> 00:20:25.680
Yeah.
00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:26.559
Good single time.
00:20:26.799 --> 00:20:26.880
Yeah.
00:20:27.200 --> 00:20:29.359
So are you looking to get married, have kids?
00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:32.000
Um, I mean, not immediately, no.
00:20:32.240 --> 00:20:33.599
Uh, I would like to be married.
00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:37.359
I don't really, I'm kind of iffy on the topic of kids.
00:20:37.519 --> 00:20:39.599
I don't I don't have the urge.
00:20:39.839 --> 00:20:41.200
Maybe I'll get it one day.
00:20:41.359 --> 00:20:41.519
Yeah.
00:20:41.680 --> 00:20:42.079
I don't know.
00:20:42.160 --> 00:20:43.440
But I would like to get married one day.
00:20:43.680 --> 00:20:43.920
Yeah.
00:20:44.400 --> 00:20:45.839
When was your longest relationship?
00:20:45.920 --> 00:20:47.119
When was your last relationship?
00:20:47.839 --> 00:20:54.960
Um my last relationship um ended when was that?
00:20:55.200 --> 00:20:56.720
Ended three years ago.
00:20:57.119 --> 00:21:02.240
Um my longest relationship has been about a year.
00:21:02.640 --> 00:21:05.039
If you don't mind me asking, why did the last one end?
00:21:06.319 --> 00:21:12.480
Um I just realized there were there were a few things that happen.
00:21:12.640 --> 00:21:15.039
It was like, it's always, it always piles up, right?
00:21:15.119 --> 00:21:19.039
And all these things like happen and you like, you're like, oh, it's okay.
00:21:19.119 --> 00:21:22.480
And then you realize one day all of these things have happened.
00:21:22.799 --> 00:21:27.440
Um he just didn't really listen to me or understand me as a person.
00:21:27.599 --> 00:21:35.839
And we had been together long enough that I was like, oh, you just don't care to get to know me or to remember these things about me.
00:21:36.160 --> 00:21:38.240
And I was like, I don't want to be with somebody like that.
00:21:38.799 --> 00:21:50.000
How do you feel about there's kind of this thing going around where you save notes about the person that you're dating in their contact in your phone so that you don't forget the little important things?
00:21:50.319 --> 00:21:51.119
How do you feel about that?
00:21:51.200 --> 00:21:54.160
Do you feel like that's like a cheater, like a cheater way of doing it?
00:21:54.319 --> 00:21:59.920
Like so that you don't have to actually remember and pay that close of attention, you just have to write it down.
00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:09.680
Um, I've had boyfriends do that about me, and it was always sweet, but it was, I also did feel like it was like a bit of a cop out.
00:22:09.920 --> 00:22:14.240
Like you shouldn't have to remember that my birthday is when it is, it's my birthday.
00:22:14.400 --> 00:22:17.119
And also that boyfriend, his birthday, the day before mine.
00:22:17.279 --> 00:22:17.440
What?
00:22:17.680 --> 00:22:18.960
So how do I excuse?
00:22:19.759 --> 00:22:21.359
Why did he need to write that down?
00:22:21.599 --> 00:22:22.640
That's crazy.
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:27.119
But yeah, I mean it I think the idea behind it's sweet, but it can be like really.
00:22:29.839 --> 00:22:32.960
Do you have any crazy first dates or disaster first dates?
00:22:33.359 --> 00:22:34.000
Definitely.
00:22:34.559 --> 00:22:35.680
That's the craziest.
00:22:36.319 --> 00:22:39.200
Um there was one date that I went on.
00:22:39.359 --> 00:22:42.000
Um, I used to, so context.
00:22:42.160 --> 00:22:44.000
I used to live in the Czech Republic.
00:22:44.160 --> 00:22:52.720
I was an English teacher there, and I had just moved there, went out with some friends, went to the bar, met this guy, set up a date.
00:22:53.200 --> 00:23:00.720
He was uh Slovakian, and I didn't speak Czech at the time.
00:23:00.799 --> 00:23:02.400
I definitely didn't speak Slovak.
00:23:02.640 --> 00:23:10.880
Um and his English wasn't that great, and so we ended up setting up this date, and he was like, let's go to this tea house.
00:23:11.200 --> 00:23:20.480
And I feel like people that have lived in Europe, particularly in Prague, if you say tea house, like let's go to tea house, there is a connotation to that.
00:23:20.720 --> 00:23:22.160
I didn't know that at the time.
00:23:22.480 --> 00:23:27.119
So we ended up going, and it was, to be fair, a place that served tea.
00:23:27.200 --> 00:23:30.240
They had this huge tea list, but there was nobody there.
00:23:31.359 --> 00:23:39.359
It was like very comfortable couches, like puffs on the ground, very like comfy, cozy.
00:23:39.920 --> 00:23:41.440
Too comfy, cozy.
00:23:43.279 --> 00:23:46.000
Looking back, no one in the place.
00:23:46.319 --> 00:23:49.279
The girls served us our tea and then disappeared.
00:23:49.359 --> 00:23:53.759
And at some point I went to the bathroom, and I realized the place is huge.
00:23:53.920 --> 00:23:56.880
There's a lot of these rooms down this hallway.
00:23:56.960 --> 00:24:03.440
There was like a dozen rooms, doors closed, and on the way back, I like hear people talking.
00:24:03.519 --> 00:24:09.279
So I look over and it's a room of like 12 women in robes and lingerie.
00:24:09.759 --> 00:24:13.599
And I was like, Oh, it kind of clicked in my mind.
00:24:13.759 --> 00:24:20.400
I went to the front desk and I like was looking at their menu and stuff, and they had like their menu of services and whatever.
00:24:20.559 --> 00:24:22.240
It was uh a brothel.
00:24:22.400 --> 00:24:23.200
Oh my god.
00:24:23.359 --> 00:24:23.759
What?
00:24:24.079 --> 00:24:35.279
At the very least, they did erotic massage because I could it was all in check, but I could understand that sex massage, I understand what that is.
00:24:35.599 --> 00:24:38.160
So that was not the best first date I've ever had.
00:24:38.559 --> 00:24:39.599
So why did he take you down?
00:24:39.839 --> 00:24:40.559
What was he expecting?
00:24:40.720 --> 00:24:41.440
I don't know.
00:24:41.680 --> 00:24:50.799
I think there's um I think there's like an assumption with European men, particularly, that women, American women are very easy to get in bed.
00:24:51.119 --> 00:24:53.519
And that's maybe what he was going for.
00:24:54.240 --> 00:25:05.039
Yeah, it was very you know, the Eastern European men that I've met though are also very open sexually.
00:25:05.359 --> 00:25:13.440
I have a friend that is Serbian, and he has told me, he's like, Oh yeah, if I'm having a dry spell, I just hire a prostitute.
00:25:13.599 --> 00:25:15.440
He's like, just be safe, it's fine.
00:25:15.599 --> 00:25:27.759
So I feel like there's cult there is it might be that he thought you were easy, but I do feel like there is cultural differences between Europeans and Americans too when you're dating.
00:25:28.079 --> 00:25:29.680
So did you leave right right away?
00:25:29.839 --> 00:25:30.160
Yeah.
00:25:30.480 --> 00:25:36.160
Cause I'm just I'm still thinking, what was he expecting you guys to get erotic massages and then maybe get you all turned on?
00:25:36.240 --> 00:25:38.319
And then like I still want to know as intended.
00:25:39.279 --> 00:25:42.799
I I went back to the table and I was like, I'm sorry, I gotta go.
00:25:43.759 --> 00:25:44.480
He was like, why?
00:25:44.559 --> 00:25:48.480
And I'm like, wow, I feel like I don't need to explain.
00:25:48.720 --> 00:25:48.960
Right?
00:25:49.039 --> 00:25:49.519
That's true.
00:25:49.599 --> 00:25:55.920
Like, did he want you just for him, or did he want you to try to invite someone else?
00:25:56.079 --> 00:26:02.079
Like, did he want to bring in other ladies from the brothel?
00:26:02.400 --> 00:26:02.799
Who knows?
00:26:03.119 --> 00:26:07.680
Do you have a crazy unique talent that no one knows about, or something not many people know about you?
00:26:08.480 --> 00:26:11.839
Um I don't know.
00:26:12.000 --> 00:26:14.799
I feel like maybe not.
00:26:15.200 --> 00:26:19.200
I feel like my fun fact is always that I was an English teacher in the Czech Republic.
00:26:19.359 --> 00:26:20.880
Um did you like it there?
00:26:21.279 --> 00:26:21.680
I did.
00:26:21.759 --> 00:26:22.240
It was great.
00:26:22.640 --> 00:26:25.680
Prague was a beautiful city, very fun place to live.
00:26:26.319 --> 00:26:26.960
Are you ready for it?
00:26:27.359 --> 00:26:28.160
I'm ready for it.
00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:31.680
The Keep More Minute brought to you by Tactical Tax Strategies.
00:26:31.839 --> 00:26:33.359
They help you keep more in your wallet.
00:26:33.440 --> 00:26:35.759
We help you keep more in your relationship.
00:26:36.480 --> 00:26:38.799
Um, all right, so we have a listener question.
00:26:40.240 --> 00:26:43.519
I met this guy online and we went on a couple of good dates.
00:26:43.680 --> 00:26:47.839
I decided it was time to take it to the next level, and I went to his place one night.
00:26:48.000 --> 00:26:51.200
One thing led to another, and we ended up heading for the bedroom.
00:26:51.440 --> 00:26:56.319
I noticed a tripod as soon as I walked in and made a silly joke.
00:26:56.480 --> 00:27:01.200
He shrugged it off and said something about it being for content, but I'm not sure.
00:27:01.440 --> 00:27:03.039
What do you guys think?
00:27:04.240 --> 00:27:10.079
I mean, was it oh, was he sneaking, trying to sneak a recording in?
00:27:10.480 --> 00:27:13.680
Yeah, was there a camera on the tripod or was it just the tripod?
00:27:14.640 --> 00:27:20.799
Like so many but the fact that he has a tripod by the bed, he's clearly recording bedroom activities, right?
00:27:21.039 --> 00:27:23.359
Whether it's with I mean, he's not doing it alone, right?
00:27:23.440 --> 00:27:24.319
He's not recording himself.
00:27:24.559 --> 00:27:26.960
Not necessarily by the bed, just in the bedroom.
00:27:27.119 --> 00:27:30.400
And if you're a content creator, are you making content in your bedroom?
00:27:30.559 --> 00:27:31.200
Probably.
00:27:31.440 --> 00:27:31.920
Aren't you?
00:27:32.480 --> 00:27:33.839
What kind of content though?
00:27:33.920 --> 00:27:34.400
In the bedroom.
00:27:34.640 --> 00:27:36.960
Because guys don't make get ready with me content.
00:27:40.880 --> 00:27:44.559
I'm thinking about like, no, you could make get ready with me content in your bedroom.
00:27:44.960 --> 00:27:46.559
He's making content in the bedroom.
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:49.039
For me personally, that would well, I would just ask him.
00:27:49.279 --> 00:27:52.640
I think you just have to ask straight up like what kind of content.
00:27:52.960 --> 00:27:54.880
Especially since he said content.
00:27:55.039 --> 00:27:55.200
Yeah.
00:27:55.440 --> 00:27:56.480
You have to ask what kind.
00:27:56.799 --> 00:27:57.839
Yeah, that is true.
00:27:58.559 --> 00:27:59.680
And you know he's not doing it alone.
00:27:59.759 --> 00:28:02.319
So you know he's making content with who knows how many women.
00:28:02.559 --> 00:28:03.680
Are you just another one of them?
00:28:03.759 --> 00:28:06.960
And is he gonna be posting the the footage from, you know?
00:28:07.279 --> 00:28:08.160
Well, then how good is it?
00:28:08.319 --> 00:28:09.759
I'd be like, let's see your resume.
00:28:09.920 --> 00:28:10.079
Right?
00:28:11.039 --> 00:28:14.559
Let's see some of this content so I can judge if I want to go on a second date.
00:28:15.200 --> 00:28:15.839
That's funny.
00:28:16.240 --> 00:28:20.079
So we're gonna discuss actual questions that people have legitimately asked.
00:28:20.160 --> 00:28:24.400
I saw a Reddit thread, and these are legitimate questions, and I want your opinion.
00:28:24.640 --> 00:28:30.079
When I take a girl out, how do I politely tell her to order within my budget without sounding broke?
00:28:30.319 --> 00:28:32.720
Like, don't take her to an expensive restaurant like that's.
00:28:33.039 --> 00:28:34.480
Take her to a restaurant that's in your budget.
00:28:35.119 --> 00:28:37.119
Take her for coffee, take her for frozen yogurt, right?
00:28:37.519 --> 00:28:41.200
I think that's in control of the question.
00:28:41.519 --> 00:28:45.680
Is it a red flag if he bought his mum on our third date, but she paid?
00:28:46.079 --> 00:28:48.319
I think it's a red flag that he's saying, but she paid.
00:28:48.480 --> 00:28:50.559
Like, I don't think it's a red flag on a third date, do you?
00:28:50.640 --> 00:28:52.720
I for me, I was I'm always about family.
00:28:52.799 --> 00:28:55.759
And if I like the guy, I would be like, hell yeah, bring your mama.
00:28:56.079 --> 00:28:56.640
Yeah, there's no way.
00:28:58.000 --> 00:28:58.559
That's a red flag.
00:28:59.279 --> 00:28:59.359
Yeah.
00:29:00.240 --> 00:29:03.039
Because, like, why is the mum there?
00:29:03.200 --> 00:29:05.440
Just because that's weird.
00:29:05.680 --> 00:29:06.799
Maybe she was in the area.
00:29:06.960 --> 00:29:12.000
So, like, if you were going out on a third date and you've already established you like the guy and he's like, Oh, my mom's in the area, she's gonna swing by.00:29:12.160 --> 00:29:12.559
No, never.00:29:12.720 --> 00:29:15.680
I would I would never introduce a man to my mother on the third date.00:29:16.079 --> 00:29:16.480
Third date.00:29:16.640 --> 00:29:17.759
Third date's way too soon.00:29:18.160 --> 00:29:20.480
Yeah, maybe that's why I was single for 20 years.00:29:21.359 --> 00:29:26.720
How many Instagram likes should you should he give my pictures per week to prove he likes me?00:29:26.960 --> 00:29:27.839
That's not gonna last.00:29:27.920 --> 00:29:30.720
If you're judging based on Instagram likes.00:29:31.759 --> 00:29:32.000
I know.00:29:32.160 --> 00:29:33.279
How old is this person?00:29:33.839 --> 00:29:37.119
Is it cheating if I flirt with his friends to make him jealous?00:29:37.359 --> 00:29:42.960
I feel like if you have to flirt with him to get his attention or for reassurance, then you're not with the right person, right?00:29:43.519 --> 00:29:44.079
Yeah, yeah.00:29:44.319 --> 00:29:48.559
I don't think it's cheating, but I also don't think that you should have to do that.00:29:48.960 --> 00:29:49.519
Yeah, exactly.00:29:49.680 --> 00:29:52.720
I don't think it's cheating either, but it's also not right.00:29:52.880 --> 00:29:55.039
And you shouldn't be doing that to get his attention.00:29:55.359 --> 00:29:58.640
I think if you feel like you have to flirt with his friends, he's not the one.00:29:58.799 --> 00:30:00.559
And yeah, I agree, right?00:30:00.640 --> 00:30:05.119
He's clearly not giving you that assurance that you need if you feel like you have to do something to get his attention.00:30:05.359 --> 00:30:07.839
Should I post a thirst trap after he ghosts me?00:30:07.920 --> 00:30:10.000
I know so many women that do it.00:30:10.319 --> 00:30:10.880
We'll do it.00:30:11.039 --> 00:30:11.519
Post it.00:30:14.480 --> 00:30:15.680
The worst the better.00:30:16.000 --> 00:30:21.039
Even if he doesn't interact or come back, somebody else might slide in the DMs.00:30:21.279 --> 00:30:21.680
You never know.00:30:23.200 --> 00:30:23.599
Exactly.00:30:23.839 --> 00:30:24.319
I think so.00:30:24.400 --> 00:30:25.279
I think do it.00:30:25.599 --> 00:30:29.519
Can I manifest him texting me back by journaling about it?00:30:30.000 --> 00:30:31.519
No, I don't think so, right?00:30:31.599 --> 00:30:42.960
There's nothing you can do, I feel if he's not gonna if it if you want to do it to make yourself feel better, yeah, by all means, but it's not unless you're Sabrina, the teenage witch, maybe.00:30:43.359 --> 00:30:46.240
Should I pretend to be less smart so he feels more masculine?00:30:46.400 --> 00:30:48.799
Like, no, like you should not change who you are, right?00:30:49.039 --> 00:30:52.079
No, I'm definitely guilty of doing that when I was younger.00:30:52.480 --> 00:31:01.200
Yeah, because I I never wanted to make a guy feel stupid, and so I'd be like, oh, like explain whatever he'd be talking about something, I'd be like, no, I don't know anything about that.00:31:01.359 --> 00:31:02.880
And I'm like, Yes, I do.00:31:03.200 --> 00:31:06.319
The worst was when they would get it wrong, and I'm like, Yeah.00:31:06.559 --> 00:31:14.960
Oh I it's I will sometimes be quiet about things so that I can hear what other people have to say about them.00:31:15.119 --> 00:31:29.759
I wouldn't necessarily call it playing dumb, but it's like more just like not saying anything in the moment to sort of feel out what the what the consensus is, I guess, before giving the two cents.00:31:30.319 --> 00:31:33.279
How long should I wait to stalk his ex on social media?00:31:33.440 --> 00:31:34.319
I don't think you need to wait.00:31:34.480 --> 00:31:36.880
I don't think you need to wait until we do it, right?00:31:37.039 --> 00:31:40.079
How many of us we always talk family and exes and right?00:31:40.240 --> 00:31:41.519
Yeah, everybody stalks everybody.00:31:42.480 --> 00:31:44.319
Oh my god, just send a friend request.00:31:44.480 --> 00:31:45.440
Yeah, I've done that before.00:31:46.079 --> 00:31:46.720
Cringe.00:31:47.440 --> 00:31:50.319
He won't commit but says I'm his person spiritually.00:31:50.480 --> 00:31:51.839
Is that basically marriage?00:31:52.079 --> 00:31:56.960
Like, no, no, like and if he's not committing, like doesn't that screen volumes?00:31:57.359 --> 00:31:58.480
Yeah, yeah.00:31:58.799 --> 00:31:59.519
What does that even mean?00:31:59.680 --> 00:32:01.119
You're my person spiritually.00:32:01.359 --> 00:32:05.039
Okay, what about physically or emotionally?00:32:05.359 --> 00:32:09.039
He called me by his ex's name, but said it's because I have similar energy.00:32:09.119 --> 00:32:10.480
Is this a good thing?00:32:10.720 --> 00:32:15.680
No, no, I don't think it's ever a good thing if someone called you by their ex's name, right?00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:17.119
No, it's not a good thing.00:32:17.359 --> 00:32:18.640
But I don't think it's necessary.00:32:18.880 --> 00:32:21.680
Some I mean, I think it can be it can be an accident.00:32:21.920 --> 00:32:22.240
Yeah.00:32:22.480 --> 00:32:26.640
I remember when I first started dating my husband, he would call me his ex's name because we're both L's.00:32:27.039 --> 00:32:28.240
Like he did that quite a few times.00:32:28.640 --> 00:32:30.799
He's like, it's just it's so confusing because your names are so similar.00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:31.839
See, that's what I'm saying.00:32:31.920 --> 00:32:34.240
Like, I don't think it's a like a deal breaker.00:32:34.400 --> 00:32:43.599
I don't think it's something that you should totally but it but it is, it's sometimes it's hard to and if it's not in the bedroom, I feel if it's in the bedroom, it might be a little more concerning.00:32:43.680 --> 00:32:43.839
Yeah.00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:52.640
But and your husband has like you have a stepson, and so he still has contact because he co-parents that's right, and so she's still in his life.00:32:52.960 --> 00:32:54.480
I think it's different that way too.00:32:54.720 --> 00:33:00.559
If the person is still regularly speaking with their ex, it's different.00:33:00.799 --> 00:33:09.279
But if it's an ex that they aren't that they don't have any sort of a relationship with anymore, and they're confusing the names, then I think it's more of a problem.00:33:09.519 --> 00:33:10.480
Yeah, yeah, agreed.00:33:10.640 --> 00:33:12.880
He still lives with his ex but says they're just roommates.00:33:13.039 --> 00:33:13.599
Should I trust it?00:33:14.000 --> 00:33:15.440
There's no way, absolutely not.00:33:16.319 --> 00:33:18.559
He doesn't have a job, but he says he has big plans.00:33:18.720 --> 00:33:19.839
Do I invest emotionally?00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:20.160
No.00:33:20.240 --> 00:33:20.880
No, no.00:33:21.119 --> 00:33:24.799
Is it a red flag if he asks for a paternity test after our second date?00:33:24.880 --> 00:33:25.359
I don't get that.00:33:25.440 --> 00:33:27.200
How can you ask a woman for a paternity test?00:33:27.440 --> 00:33:29.039
Why would he even be thinking about it?00:33:29.599 --> 00:33:30.799
I was confused by this one.00:33:31.039 --> 00:33:32.079
So is she pregnant?00:33:32.400 --> 00:33:33.680
Like, is it a pickup line?00:33:33.839 --> 00:33:35.200
He wants to know, like, who's your daddy?00:33:35.440 --> 00:33:36.559
Oh my probably.00:33:36.799 --> 00:33:38.960
The last one, should I this one is so stupid.00:33:39.119 --> 00:33:42.720
Should I get bangs before a first date so I seem mysterious?00:33:43.200 --> 00:33:44.319
I'm so dumb.00:33:45.440 --> 00:33:46.720
Don't change for anyone.00:33:46.880 --> 00:33:50.799
So now we're gonna chat about the celebrity cup where we marinate in the juices of the celebrities.00:33:50.960 --> 00:33:55.680
Did you see that Travis Kelsey came out saying that he and Taylor Swift have never gotten into a fight?00:33:55.839 --> 00:33:56.799
Yes, I did see that.00:33:57.039 --> 00:33:57.759
How do you feel about that?00:33:57.920 --> 00:33:59.039
That's crazy.00:33:59.519 --> 00:34:01.680
I feel they've been together for a few years.00:34:01.920 --> 00:34:02.000
Right.00:34:02.240 --> 00:34:03.440
At this point, I think like two years.00:34:03.680 --> 00:34:04.960
They've never had a single argument.00:34:05.279 --> 00:34:10.320
So I remember when George Clooney came out and said this about him and Amal, and they've been together I feel like 10 years.00:34:10.480 --> 00:34:12.000
And I think that's why Travis said it.00:34:12.079 --> 00:34:19.519
I think they were talking about George Clooney and Amal saying that, and whoever was interviewing him was like, Can you believe that?00:34:19.679 --> 00:34:22.400
And Travis was like, actually I can, because we don't fight.00:34:22.639 --> 00:34:28.639
But I remember a bunch of experts came out and there were a bunch of TikTok videos that were like, This is not normal, this is not healthy.00:34:28.719 --> 00:34:28.880
Yeah.00:34:29.119 --> 00:34:35.280
Like there's something else going on because it's not healthy for a relationship to avoid the conflict.00:34:35.440 --> 00:34:36.000
Right, you know.00:34:36.159 --> 00:34:36.400
Yeah.00:34:36.559 --> 00:34:39.199
Um, so I think there's something else must be going on.00:34:39.280 --> 00:34:45.199
Like, I don't know, it just seems dodgy to me, or like you're trying to overcompensate or prove to the world that you're so perfect.00:34:45.519 --> 00:34:46.960
I think that might be it.00:34:47.119 --> 00:34:53.440
I feel like, especially those two are under so much scrutiny of like everybody in the world knows who they are.00:34:53.599 --> 00:34:59.679
Everybody's like watching their every move, but maybe he just wants to be like, no, we're actually the perfect couple, don't worry about us.00:34:59.760 --> 00:35:07.280
And by saying that, everyone's like, but he also he also said that it's not that they've never had conflict.00:35:07.360 --> 00:35:11.440
And so I think there's a difference between conflict resolution and fighting.00:35:11.679 --> 00:35:18.960
I feel like you can have conflict with your partner and have differing opinions and feel differently about things and not fight about it.00:35:19.119 --> 00:35:21.679
Well, I think you can both resolve.00:35:22.000 --> 00:35:23.840
I guess it depends on what your definition of fighting.00:35:23.920 --> 00:35:29.440
Like when I did my research, like there were multiple articles on CNN, ABC saying it's not healthy to not fight in a relationship.00:35:29.679 --> 00:35:32.719
But I think physically fighting, okay, that's different.00:35:32.880 --> 00:35:40.079
But maybe I think they're taking it as in fighting mean meaning having a differing opinion or a conflict, or I don't know.00:35:40.400 --> 00:35:48.000
Yeah, because I think you can have conflict and resolve it in a mature way that doesn't end in a quote unquote fight.00:35:48.239 --> 00:35:51.920
And so then you say, Oh, yeah, we don't fight because you don't.00:35:52.079 --> 00:35:56.000
You don't have a fight when there's a conflict, you just resolve it like mature.00:35:56.480 --> 00:35:58.800
But I will say, I feel like they travel a lot, right?00:35:58.880 --> 00:35:59.599
They're apart a lot.00:35:59.840 --> 00:36:00.719
I think what is it?00:36:00.880 --> 00:36:02.400
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.00:36:02.639 --> 00:36:06.800
My husband travels a lot for work, so we fight less because we're not always with each other.00:36:07.199 --> 00:36:11.039
We spend a lot of time apart, so we really appreciate each other when we're together.00:36:11.199 --> 00:36:12.960
I wonder if maybe that has something to do with it.00:36:13.599 --> 00:36:14.320
They're apart a lot.00:36:14.480 --> 00:36:14.880
I don't know.00:36:15.840 --> 00:36:19.440
Now it's time to get to know you with Zoey, sponsored by Zoeo, your neighborhood yogurt.00:36:19.599 --> 00:36:21.199
So we're gonna ask you some rapid fire questions.00:36:21.440 --> 00:36:21.599
Sure.00:36:21.920 --> 00:36:23.760
What is your favorite body part on a man?00:36:25.199 --> 00:36:26.559
Uh biceps, I think.00:36:26.800 --> 00:36:27.280
Biceps.00:36:27.599 --> 00:36:29.599
Craziest thing you've done to impress a date.00:36:32.239 --> 00:36:33.199
Oh, I don't know.00:36:33.360 --> 00:36:34.719
Um craziest thing.00:36:35.199 --> 00:36:36.639
The craziest thing?00:36:38.000 --> 00:36:38.639
I don't know.00:36:38.800 --> 00:36:40.960
Probably like get a blowout or something.00:36:41.119 --> 00:36:41.679
Nothing crazy.00:36:42.000 --> 00:36:44.159
Where should you not take a girl on a first date?00:36:44.800 --> 00:36:46.000
Not a brothel.00:36:47.440 --> 00:36:48.719
That's hilarious.00:36:49.679 --> 00:36:51.920
Uh what's your do you use a pickup line?00:36:52.400 --> 00:36:54.559
What's your line if you see someone at a bar that tickers your fancy?00:36:54.800 --> 00:36:55.840
No, I just say hi.00:36:56.880 --> 00:36:58.559
Is watching porn considered cheating?00:36:59.039 --> 00:36:59.840
No, I don't think so.00:37:00.159 --> 00:37:03.679
Before you're intimate, is it appropriate to ask how many people they've been with?00:37:04.239 --> 00:37:06.320
I don't think it's ever appropriate to ask that.00:37:06.960 --> 00:37:09.039
Is it acceptable to have sex on the first date?00:37:09.440 --> 00:37:10.239
Yeah, of course.00:37:10.800 --> 00:37:14.159
Should you disclose mental health issues early on in a relationship?00:37:14.639 --> 00:37:19.119
Yeah, I think if you gotten to the point that you're in a relationship, it's fair to talk about that.00:37:19.440 --> 00:37:22.559
And last but not least, what is your favorite sexual position and why?00:37:22.880 --> 00:37:23.599
Oh no.00:37:24.079 --> 00:37:25.840
I feel like it depends on the guy.00:37:26.000 --> 00:37:34.079
I feel like it's so dependent on what he's got going on that you have to figure it out together.00:37:34.159 --> 00:37:35.920
Yeah what works best for both of you.00:37:36.400 --> 00:37:40.320
If a guy wants to take you out, what is your preferred location for a first date?00:37:40.400 --> 00:37:40.960
Do you like coffee?00:37:41.039 --> 00:37:41.599
Are you dinner?00:37:41.760 --> 00:37:42.960
Are you an activity girl?00:37:43.280 --> 00:37:45.039
Um, I like a drink.00:37:45.280 --> 00:37:45.599
A drink?00:37:45.920 --> 00:37:48.480
A drink that might be come dinner, you know.00:37:48.719 --> 00:37:52.719
I like um like a wine bar or cocktail bar.00:37:52.960 --> 00:37:55.280
I don't really drink coffee that often.00:37:55.440 --> 00:37:57.199
And so I get asked on coffee dates.00:37:57.280 --> 00:38:00.719
I feel like that's the the most common thing to do now is coffee dates.00:38:00.880 --> 00:38:01.519
And that's fine.00:38:01.599 --> 00:38:04.639
I'll go on a coffee date, I'll just get tea or a smoothie or something.00:38:04.800 --> 00:38:08.960
But I do try to maybe I don't want to meet you at 10 in the morning.00:38:09.039 --> 00:38:10.480
That's not really when I'm at my best.00:38:10.559 --> 00:38:12.400
Maybe let's meet at seven tonight.00:38:12.639 --> 00:38:16.480
Especially if you've met them already, if it's someone you've met at one of your events or something.00:38:16.639 --> 00:38:16.800
Yeah.00:38:17.039 --> 00:38:20.239
I feel like coffee's good when you haven't met the person already.00:38:20.320 --> 00:38:25.760
Yeah because it's sort of a quick yeah, it's like a low, quick in and out low pressure situation.00:38:26.000 --> 00:38:26.159
Yeah.00:38:26.239 --> 00:38:27.840
Yeah, and you it can be very fast.00:38:29.440 --> 00:38:34.639
When you asked the craziest thing you've ever done, I don't know why this is like an intrusive thought that came to my mind.00:38:34.719 --> 00:38:44.079
I was like, oh my God, imagine she says she planned a whole singles event and only invited the guy that she had a crush on, and then only he showed up and it was just the two of them.00:38:44.320 --> 00:38:46.239
That would be that would be amazing.00:38:46.480 --> 00:38:46.880
I'd love that.00:38:47.119 --> 00:38:48.719
You're welcome for that piece of game.00:38:49.519 --> 00:38:50.079
Write that down.00:38:50.480 --> 00:38:51.199
Any other questions?00:38:51.440 --> 00:38:52.960
Do you have anything you want to add?00:38:53.360 --> 00:38:54.239
No, I don't think so.00:38:54.400 --> 00:38:56.079
What can people find out about your single events?00:38:57.360 --> 00:38:58.559
Instagram mostly.00:38:58.800 --> 00:39:00.880
We are at thursday.phoenix.00:39:01.039 --> 00:39:04.239
We do have a website, just get thhursday.com.00:39:04.880 --> 00:39:06.480
All of our events are listed there.00:39:06.719 --> 00:39:06.960
Great.00:39:07.119 --> 00:39:10.320
Well, thank you so much for joining us this week at the meat market, and thank you so much, Maddie.00:39:10.400 --> 00:39:14.400
If you want to snag a date with Maddie, go to any of our social media platforms at Meat Market Podcast.00:39:14.480 --> 00:39:16.639
And thank you to our sponsor, Tactical Tax Strategies.00:39:16.800 --> 00:39:21.119
If you want to preserve your wealth and keep more in your wallet, you need to go to Tactical Tax Strategies.00:39:21.199 --> 00:39:23.519
We'll see you next week at the Meat Market.00:39:24.800 --> 00:39:27.679
Oh my god, I just totally got catfished.00:39:27.760 --> 00:39:29.920
He looks absolutely nothing like his picture.00:39:30.159 --> 00:39:34.880
So I found out the guy that I've been dating is married with kids.00:39:35.039 --> 00:39:37.519
His wife just reached out to me.
