HE'S 6'7" AND HIS STANDARDS ARE EVEN HIGHER

Basketball Abroad And Meeting His Wife

SPEAKER_02 0:00

You are a former athlete. Tell us about it. What did you play?

SPEAKER_05 0:03

Yeah, uh basketball. Um I'm standing six foot seven, so put it to good use and played uh collegially and played in uh New Zealand and Puerto Rico as well.

SPEAKER_02 0:12

Oh nice. Did you get a lot of groupies after you?

SPEAKER_05 0:17

Uh definitely led into attraction, uh, I'd say. Um, but I tried to stay focused, you know, because that's what I was getting paid for, and you know, that was the focus.

SPEAKER_02 0:26

But did you have a data fan or a groupie?

SPEAKER_05 0:29

Uh it's funny. I I I definitely have had people reach out from the crowds, you know, um, and connections through social media or whatever it was. Um I think from college I did uh there was a girl that reached out to me, like you know, ended up being um my wife. It you know, it progressed to that. So that was uh that was exciting. Uh and uh, you know, it's just a whole series of events led to another. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:57

Are people tall in New Zealand?

SPEAKER_05 0:59

I'd say there's a lot of like rugby. Rugby's big over there, right? Uh, and so there's a lot of like massive people there. I'd say it varies. You know, Steven Adams is one of the um biggest ones from the uh can OKUS OKC. Um, I guess he was really prevalent then, but um he's from New Zealand.

SPEAKER_01 1:15

So the Kiwis, that's what they call the local because I can imagine playing in Puerto Rico, a six foot seven white guy stands out very different than Puerto Rico. And so you probably got approached differently, and so that's why I ask about New Zealand, what the people are like there, because you probably didn't stand out quite as much.

SPEAKER_05 1:32

Correct. That's a great point. There's it's two totally different cultures, right? One's the more beachy oasis kind of vibe, and then one's more. I mean, we were talking about it like more of the adventure vibe.

SPEAKER_03 1:43

I'm just gonna cheap.

SPEAKER_05 1:47

That's funny. We did chase some sheep on the mountains, which is funny you brought that up. But um, yeah, so two totally different, you know, types and just very chill, like laid-back demeanor. That's where I kind of fit in, was more the chill vibe.

SPEAKER_01 1:59

Um were you married while you were in those places, or were you single in those places? You were how was it dating?

SPEAKER_05 2:06

Uh, it's a good question because when I was there, it was two short tours in New Zealand and Puerto Rico. Um, and so the it was kind of more of a um philanthropical event. So it was actually college summer um seasons of my college uh career, right? Uh so it was kind of a different than actually getting paid to play overseas. Um, but to answer your question, the dating side of things, I don't think I really it just wasn't a focus. And I I know it sounds crazy, but like I think that was kind of going into it. Really, it was basketball, it was film philanthropical stuff, it was serving the community, those kind of things. Um dating didn't really come to like I guess post post-basketball.

SPEAKER_02 2:47

But what would you say you prefer, the Puerto Rican ladies or the Kiwis?

SPEAKER_05 2:50

That's funny. Um, yeah, I think on the I guess the more demeanor side of things, um, it would be the uh, you know, on the New Zealand side, um, more grounded, more like kind of like just like that peaceful demeanor, I guess. Yeah. Um, but then the fun, the outwardly spoken outward going, um, I'd say more on the Puerto Rican side. So kind of both. Um, but I uh I'd lean more towards the New Zealand side, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:17

So being six, seven, you must get a lot of attention from women because every single woman we have on this show is like, I need a tall guy, as tall taller than six foot one at least. So you must get approached a lot, huh?

SPEAKER_05 3:28

Yeah, I'd say so. I mean, I I definitely know that like tall is an attraction thing. Um, it's interesting though, because like I have such a like a humble, peaceful nature about me. So there is like this like groundedness that I can bring. Um, and so yeah, it's I'd say, you know, I I think it's a part of it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:50

Do you have a lot of women using that as a line about your height? Pickup lines.

SPEAKER_05 3:55

I think, yeah, like you're really tall is just tired of my response is just I am. Yes. Yes, I yes, I did play basketball, and yes, they, you know, weather's good up here.

SPEAKER_02 4:07

Um, so oh my god, the weather's good up here.

SPEAKER_05 4:10

I just start answering the questions for them before they even ask.

SPEAKER_02 4:12

That's funny. What line works on you?

SPEAKER_05 4:14

Um, I don't know. I I'm just it's it's interesting. I I keep referring to this like peaceful demeanor, but like a woman who's grounded, a woman who's confident in herself, who's not like um a woman who's looking to be pursued, uh, you know, and I think that's really important to me. Um and so a line that would work, I don't know. I I just I think someone noticing like me in how I show up, um, maybe like a compliment of like, you know, hey, I can see that you you know do a lot of like heartwork or like you know, in mindset, those kind of things. Um, someone who recognizes that and like an entrepreneurial background too.

SPEAKER_02 4:57

Um people who can recognize how good of a person you are and how hard you work.

SPEAKER_05 5:01

Yeah, hard worker, um, diligent, integrity, character. Um, I say some of those things for sure.

SPEAKER_01 5:06

But you say that you're attracted to a woman who likes to be pursued. So then do you prefer to make the first move?

SPEAKER_05 5:12

I do.

SPEAKER_01 5:13

It is okay. So if is it un is it unattractive to you though, if a woman approaches you and sort of comes on to you?

SPEAKER_05 5:20

No, not at all. I think if it's if it's the right, you know, like connection, right? Like I can tell intentions pretty quickly with discernment. Um, but I think that it's definitely leaning into what's the approach in this? Um, and honestly, like I'm not necessarily in the bar scenes as much. It's more of like in a networking event or it's more of a um, you know, like a uh just like engagement. Like I do like a lot of like even Bible studies, like faith is very important to me. So finding the rooms

Height Attention And Making The First Move

SPEAKER_05 5:50

like that that are, you know, those that are find that of value.

SPEAKER_01 5:53

Well, because have we talked about the handkerchief thing before? How it used to be like the woman, they always when it's always the argument between like who makes the first move, the man or the woman. And it's like historically, women don't make the first move, but there's the handkerchief thing. Like the woman drops her handkerchief to let the man know that she's interested in having him pursue her. So it kind of is like the woman making the first move. The handkerchief is. So, what's the today's handkerchief? Is it just walking up to a guy?

SPEAKER_02 6:26

But my question is this are you looking at the guy that you want to approach? Because what if you do the handkerchief thing and someone you don't guys come up and buy?

SPEAKER_00 6:33

That's true. That's true. Right. Um survival of the fittest. Do get out voice.

SPEAKER_04 6:39

That's right.

SPEAKER_05 6:39

That's right, just a fight. Who wants to pursue me more? Um, yeah, I don't know. I love that thought. Uh, and you know, I've I've definitely definitely heard that like a while, like an old like back in the day kind of thing. Um, yeah, I think it's just like it's that it's that um instant connection. Sometimes you can just hit it off with people, right? And you can kind of tell. Um, and then you just kind of lean into that. What's going flows naturally? Um now what's your line?

SPEAKER_02 7:03

Do you have a line that you use?

SPEAKER_05 7:06

I start with a compliment, you know, um, and just kind of ease into it. Like, and it's like it's so interesting because I say interesting because I just came out of a season of like I was married for seven years. Um, and so part of my story is like coming out of that and kind of the restart or the rebuild of you know the past two years. Um so it's definitely been this like different background of of Dylan's journey. Um, but uh, you know, I'm I'm easing back into that. I'm I'm you know, finding those pat those pockets of space, the gym, you know, specifically. Um, and just you know, someone who you can kind of just cross in passing and just notice something or you know, whatever it is compliment wise. But yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:46

Do you like tall women or do you prefer the petite women?

SPEAKER_05 7:49

Yeah, it's it's a good question. I don't think it has to be specific. I do um, you know, it's it's nice to have uh, you know, I'd say that five nine to five, six to five ten, maybe in that range. Um, and so I I think in that, you know, that'd be an ideal world.

SPEAKER_01 8:06

Um, but height isn't like you don't want to develop back problems as you get older, you know, very true.

SPEAKER_05 8:12

Oh five two. And given given the woman like the freedom to wear heels, right? Like so I feel like I know that's a hard desire of women to like want to wear heels. And sometimes men are shorter, so they're like, do I want to be taller than my man? You know, it's like doesn't matter with me.

SPEAKER_01 8:27

Have you done much dating in the last two years? You said two years since you've been divorced.

SPEAKER_05 8:32

So um I have. I've dated um for six months. Um, there was a uh uh a woman I I dated, and it was a phenomenal connection, relationship. Um really cool how it started and um progressed. Our first date was like kind of around this time frame of fall. So it was like the fall, you know, festivals and just mixing and up being different, you know. Um she was ended up being the uh host of the Phoenix Suns. Uh so basketball is a big thing for me. So like we we definitely had a lot in common in that in that arena, but um yeah, um definitely had some some dating pockets for sure.

SPEAKER_01 9:08

Have you had any bad dates?

SPEAKER_05 9:10

Uh it's interesting. So the Facebook dating uh profile thing, that's the only like as far as like even close to an app I would go, I went to. Um, and so there was definitely a time where I, you know, it was like just a kind of a blind date connection. Um and uh and then we ended up going to this random bar. It was actually on my birthday, like real, like it was it was such a random instance. Um and uh just to not pan out, you could just like the the energy, the tension, the like trying to get over that hump of like making the initial connection, um, and then realizing like there was nothing really we share in common.

SPEAKER_02 9:46

So it's just did she look like her pictures? Did she didn't catfish you, did she?

SPEAKER_05 9:51

Uh somewhat. Um there was more like you know, like headshots, and she was more like she was definitely a lot shorter. Um but yeah, it was it was definitely a um not what was expecting.

SPEAKER_02 10:03

So that's the only kind of online dating you've done?

SPEAKER_05 10:06

I'd say so, yeah. And that maybe that's something I need to explore in, right? Um, but I think definitely like I do enjoy the um adventure in the pursuit of like natural you know connections.

SPEAKER_01 10:20

I think from the stories we've heard stay off the apps. Yeah, like nobody likes them. Nobody statistically they're declining. Yeah, and we haven't had a single guest, I feel, that has come and been like, I use the dating apps and I love them. They're amazing. Raving fan.

SPEAKER_05 10:37

You should yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah, I don't know. I just I think there's so much superficialness in it, just going based off a picture and what they say in words. And it's like honestly, like even on the Facebook side, like I'd be like, hey, can we just hop on a call? Like, I don't want to text, I want to message, like can I just I can tell pretty quickly if we have a conversation if we're gonna like even want to take it to a date, you know?

SPEAKER_01 11:01

So do you read profiles?

SPEAKER_05 11:02

Um, not necessarily. I mean, most of them are chat GPT, so it's like that's a good thing.

SPEAKER_01 11:10

Oh, that's actually true.

SPEAKER_05 11:11

It's like what's yeah, yeah, that is true.

SPEAKER_01 11:14

A lot of people don't take the time to sit and thoughtfully write out their own profiles, probably.

SPEAKER_02 11:18

But even if it wasn't chat GPT, do you reckon m any men read the profiles or just the pictures?

SPEAKER_01 11:24

That's why I asked. Because women, that's women's complaint all the time, is they're like men don't read the profile anyways. And so it's like a lot of the complaints are I had in my profile, I was looking for a long-term relationship. If he knew I was looking for that, why did he? And it's like because he didn't read it. The men don't read, they don't read what you're looking for, they don't read what you want, they just, if you look at cute, they swipe.

SPEAKER_02 11:49

Also, do guys care? Do they really listen? He doesn't care if she wants a long-term relationship. He's gonna try to bang her and you know, you know, I know how long guys have that mentality. Who cares? I'm gonna take her for on a date and see where it goes. Do they really consider what she says? Um I don't think so.

SPEAKER_05 12:04

I think I think it's definitely part of the equation, uh, because it it's a couple things that stand out for me are like adventurous, spontaneous. Um, you know, I again I mentioned faith, but like really like that kind of personal development, definitely fitness, health. Um but yeah, it's pretty much.

SPEAKER_02 12:20

So where do you meet people? Church, gym, yeah, activities.

SPEAKER_05 12:24

Yeah, um, gym and gym setting for sure. Uh I would say um I've been going to trying to get more into like uh the run club space, pickleball, um, a lot of networking events actually recently. So um that's been kind of the trying to just get out there more and just put myself in uncomfortable environments to where I can just like just be able to explore that and be free and you know explain. How

Divorce Recovery And Owning Your Mistakes

SPEAKER_05 12:48

old are you? Uh just turn 31. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:50

Okay. And if you don't mind me asking, so you were married. How why did that end after seven years?

SPEAKER_05 12:55

Yeah. Uh so great question. Uh we were we dated for three during the, you know, kind of the engagement was like um right when I uh finished playing basketball uh and then graduated, got engaged. So part of my journey is like the mental health uh journey. I had three concussions, um, and so that turned into like TBI and like gained 100 pounds. Like it was a whole journey to recover to where we're at today. Um, so there was a lot of me that couldn't barely take care of Dylan, much less a spouse, um, if I'm being real. And so there's a lot of ownership on my end. Um and then, you know, long term, it was just like, you know, enough is enough. And I think that I had to take some serious ownership. Uh, I think there's also some overlapping with like her season of life. She was a couple years older and she, you know, was ready for kids. And I just kind of felt like, you know, hey, like I understand where you're coming from and I want to man up and not hold you back from you know just creating a family. And I don't feel like I'm, you know, can responsibly steward that. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:54

Do you feel like you're ready for that now?

SPEAKER_05 13:56

Definitely.

SPEAKER_01 13:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 13:57

Yeah, definitely. I've taken, you know, ownership of a lot of things, and I feel like I've, you know, got my fitness dialed in. I just did high rocks February. I'm down a hundred pounds. Uh, so that's you know, a huge win. High rocks is a big thing, right? Uh, and so did that on February, and then I just signed up for half marathon. So, like really building the momentum on the fitness side back to like enjoy that self-confidence, momentum, uh, and then you know, professionally definitely have some good, you know, things moving there. Um, and you know, faith and just just like I keep saying groundedness, but like that piece that aura that women look to for um I like to say three S's, right? Women want to feel safe, seen, and served, right? Um, and if they can feel those three things, then they're gonna be in a good man.

SPEAKER_02 14:43

So your profile says you're an entrepreneur. Yeah. What do you do?

SPEAKER_05 14:47

Yeah, so uh I entrepreneur kind of covers it, but I mostly sales background for eight years. Um, so I do uh I do sales for a it's kind of a financial coach coaching consulting firm. Um so they help you know financial advisors grow and scale. Um so I'm in sales there and then also I do late like leadership and life coaching. Um so I have my leadership life coaching business that I've kind of like done here and there for like four or five years. Um I've kind of put it on the back burner, but as I'm kind of in this rebuild and really build build momentum, like personally, I want to practice what I preach, serve people, and and also companies, right? So it's kind of like this theme of identity and helping them really come into uh companies and individuals, right? Like who they are, their purpose, um, meaning, background, um, and then you know, step into it from uh, you know, whether it's an individual entrepreneur or companies, um, you know, vision, mission, purpose, statements, those kind of things.

SPEAKER_01 15:41

Is a lot of that online?

SPEAKER_05 15:43

Uh yeah. So most of it I really thrive in the in-person. Um, but also the one-on-one can definitely be like an online like check-ins and like um, especially on the life coaching side. But I'd say for the in-person, like coaching for the companies, um, I like to do that definitely in a person.

SPEAKER_01 16:01

I guess do you have like a big social media presence?

SPEAKER_05 16:04

I wouldn't say big. It's I got like, you know, over 3,000 on Instagram, and I've just kind of built it naturally, and I haven't really gone full force on social media. I think that time is definitely coming soon um to really start just being more vocal, being more prevalent um and just consistent on there.

SPEAKER_01 16:24

How do you feel about a female that has social media? What like one way or another? Like, is that something that you're interested in?

SPEAKER_05 16:32

Yeah, I think it's how she uses it.

SPEAKER_01 16:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 16:34

Honestly, like if she's using it to like impact people, if she's using it to like share her story, if she's using it to like really serve people around her and make an impact, um, I love that.

SPEAKER_02 16:43

But if it's more of like for OnlyFans, she's using it to show her boothies.

SPEAKER_05 16:48

Meaning that or and or like how to, you know, like and there's one thing like to I don't know, just like the heart behind it, right? Are you doing it flashy to like seek attention? Um, or is it impact? Um, and and so yeah.

SPEAKER_02 17:03

Let's say you meet a woman and she says she's an entrepreneur and she's beautiful, gorgeous, stunning, she's sweetheart, kind-hearted, but you find out entrepreneur means she's on OnlyFans, but she does not do it with a partner, it's just herself in lingerie. Could you take that serious and pursue that? No, you couldn't. No. Even if she's clothed in a negligee.

SPEAKER_05 17:23

OnlyFans is probably not for your boy.

SPEAKER_02 17:27

So question you said you mentioned your religious. Do you need that in a partner to have the same belief as you?

SPEAKER_05 17:33

Yeah, I I'd say religion is just a uh you know, a buzzword, right? I think for me it's like, you know, if you don't stand for something, you don't stand for anything. Um, and someone who stands for um core values, um, character, right? Uh character, you know, someone who has strong character has fruit that's attached to that and it's it's prevalent in their life and how they show up. Uh, and so I think it's definitely uh faith in um, you know, I think it is faith, faith in God for me, um, and having that same core values that we can share to raise our kids up in the same house. Um, this is definitely important.

SPEAKER_02 18:10

Going back to tall women, I read an interview with Kylie Kelsey, because you know, she's 5'11, I think. And she was saying that in high school there was this one kid that bullied her every single day in junior year, calling her a man. She's like, every day he would call me a man. But she said that because she's so tall, having babies was so easy for her. I guess if you're tall, like it's easier to childbirth is easier. So she's like, I will take being called a man every day of my junior year if it means having my kids just slide right out of my vagina. It's hilarious. But I didn't know that. If you're tall, it's easier to pass the baby through. I didn't know that either.

SPEAKER_04 18:46

Can't second that. But yeah, that I mean height makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 18:50

So, question I have to help the ladies out. Yeah. Um, because we've had a couple tall guys on here and say that they get really annoyed when women approach them and their line is something about the height. Does that annoy you? Should we tell the ladies not to use height as a first line?

SPEAKER_05 19:03

Uh I wouldn't say it's like a no. It just it's like what's not creative. Yeah, like I don't know, what's what's the approach in the in the setting? Like, I don't know. It's I think that um I get it so much, it's just kind of natural. Like, I just kind of like it.

SPEAKER_02 19:20

Because would you use that as a line? Like it's cringe to me. I would never, I'd be so mortified because right.

SPEAKER_01 19:26

But I also am from a family of tall people. Like my brother is 6'4, so being around tall people is normal for me. So I don't see a tall man out and I'm like, oh my god, he's so tall. I'm gonna go say something. Yeah, I'm like, it's just I feel like I grew up around tall people, so it's not it's it's not, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 19:46

Have you ever been cheated on?

SPEAKER_05 19:48

Um, that's a good question. No.

SPEAKER_02 19:51

No. And you've never cheated?

SPEAKER_05 19:53

Uh I would be lying if I I did uh say I didn't. I I I have. Um and that's part of my story of like taking ownership and you know, stepping into myself fully and not seeking elsewhere, right? Um and being truly satisfied with who I am. So I'm not seeking for validation in someone else when I need it in myself first. So yeah, did she find out?

SPEAKER_02 20:15

How did you find out? What did you tell her?

SPEAKER_05 20:17

Yeah, um, I I communicated to uh it uh and it it was definitely a um kind of a mutual like um it was kind of timing, right? Like kind of same time. Uh so it was uh it's definitely hard, hard part of my story for sure to keep it real.

SPEAKER_01 20:38

Is that why your marriage ended?

SPEAKER_05 20:40

Um I think it was it was definitely one of the reasons. I think the ownership to change the ownership to like continue to like better myself and step into that uh was was a a huge part of it too, right?

SPEAKER_02 20:51

Like, yeah, so have you ever walked out mid-date or wanted to?

SPEAKER_05 20:55

Walked out mid-date. No, um, I don't think that's fair for the person. I think it's it's f you know, following through, but also at the end communicating like, hey, this this just like is not working out, I think, from a from a high level, not just saying that directly, but yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:11

Where did you grow up?

SPEAKER_05 21:12

I'm an Alabama boy. Um so I got the Southern Roots um from Huntsville, Alabama and was there most most of the um up until college and then um moved out here about seven years ago. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:25

Do you like the typical Scottsdale girl?

SPEAKER_05 21:28

Um I wouldn't say typical Scottsdale girl in no, um from a uh just a general you know, like a uh scenario, like just like an overall like you know, values wise. Um finding a girl in Scottsdale that maybe is not like the Scottsdale girl is definitely fair though.

SPEAKER_01 21:49

Are you ready for it? I'm ready for it. The keep more minute brought to you by Tactical Tax Strategies. They keep help you keep more in your wallet, we help you keep more in your relationship. All right, we have If I can open my iPad. A listener question. Okay.

Coffee Date Etiquette And Basic Courtesy

SPEAKER_01 22:03

I was invited for coffee for a first date or meeting with this guy yesterday. Um, it was a guy from a singles group that I'm part of on Facebook. We had not met in person yet, but had been chatting on Messenger and both checked out each other's profiles. We each drove about 30 minutes to meet. He was there early and bought his coffee and was seated inside waiting for me. I arrived and we greeted each other and I sat down and we started talking. We talked for a couple hours and he never offered to buy me a coffee. He did buy himself another coffee when he went to use the restroom. I know that Facebook itself is not a dating app, but I did meet this gentleman through a mutual participation in a singles group. The more I think about it, the more I'm curious. The more curious I am if this was considered normal for a first-time date or meeting. Do most men prefer women purchase their own coffee or drink for a first date?

SPEAKER_02 23:01

I think that was rude of him to go to the rest and get another coffee. And how much is a coffee? Under five bucks? Even if it's five bucks, offer her a coffee. That's embarrassing that he let her sit there for two hours and no coffee. Deal breaker for me. Yeah, I think so too.

SPEAKER_04 23:15

That's not a gentleman. She says it's a guy.

SPEAKER_05 23:19

Honestly, like that's a I don't know. That's it's just a way to start. Like, and he didn't like wait on her to get his own coffee. Like, yeah, that's I don't know. Anyways, that's that's just a couple things for me.

SPEAKER_02 23:30

Even if it wasn't a date, what is a lady a five-dollar coffee? Yeah, and if I was there early, I'd text her and say, Hey, I'm here grabbing a coffee. What can I get for you?

SPEAKER_01 23:39

He did so many things wrong. So many things wrong.

SPEAKER_04 23:41

I was like, ooh, ooh.

SPEAKER_01 23:45

I would be like, ma'am, you were not on a date. I don't know what that was, but it wasn't a date. Yeah. I wouldn't have considered at least like offer.

SPEAKER_05 23:51

Like, I don't know. It doesn't have to be, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:53

I feel like uh she should move on next.

SPEAKER_04 23:56

On to the next one. Step in the mouth. We don't have it all figured out. But I'm definitely a coach for you, sir. A couple things I could definitely help him with for hilarious.

SPEAKER_00 24:10

I need to go back and see if I can find her information from that question. Right.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

Yeah, and send her his information. Tell him to contact him. So I saw this TikTok video.

Partying Trauma And Attention Seeking Red Flags

SPEAKER_02 24:22

This guy that says there are five types of women you should never take serious on any circumstance. And I want to get your opinion and see if you agree with this, okay? And these are his words, not mine. Number five, the party girl. Avoid her at all costs. This is a laundry list of red flags. I can agree with that. Party girl, she never takes a serious. How do you feel about that? Silence?

SPEAKER_01 24:44

A current party, like a party girl. Currently party girl. He's currently in party mode. Yeah, no. I think a reformed party girl. Oh yeah, I'm a reformed party girl.

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Must express.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

Robbing the hot must express.

SPEAKER_05 24:55

If you enjoy having fun in a party session, great. But if the party brings the fun out of you, that's totally different.

SPEAKER_02 25:03

And do you really want to date someone that's always partying that wants you to go party with them and be out till two o'clock? That's gotta be exhausting, right? I guess if at our age, maybe if you're 20. And to find partying too. It depends. It depends on where you are in life, I think, and what you want. That's true. Yeah. Not for me. Number four, again, not my words. The trauma bitches. Women that have trauma and try to dump it onto you, onto you and into your relationship. These are not good good women to have a successful relationship with, and we are not Captain Saberho here. How do you feel about that? Because some women do have trauma, right? But I guess they don't necessarily need to dump it on someone and into the relationship.

SPEAKER_05 25:38

We all have trauma.

SPEAKER_01 25:39

We all have trauma. And I think I think it's healed versus unhealed. I think the words are a little harsh. They are harsh. Like trauma like a trauma bitch. Like just like someone who hasn't done therapy. Like just someone who hasn't gone to therapy. Like if you if you have a traumatic past and you haven't gone to therapy, you're probably not a dateable person. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 26:00

I'd say for me, like I definitely one of my superpowers is empathy and listening. Um, but also knowing that like venting comes to a certain point where it's like, hey, let's work through this thing, like grow towards something versus just like dumping, right? That's sometimes a phrase that people use. Um trying to find that balance.

SPEAKER_02 26:17

And that's gotta suck if their trauma affects the relationship and like prevents it from progressing and moving forward. So I guess if you're a good person, you should try to advise her to get some help. Get some help. Yeah. Number three, the victim. And I agree with this. She's always the victim, nothing is ever her fault. They blame everyone else, even though they're the common denominator. I cannot stand the victim mentality, right? Could you deal with that? I couldn't deal with it. I agree with that one. Like Meghan Markle. Number two, Miami. No other words needed. I disagree with this. I think it's Scottsdale. No other words needed. But are the women bad in Miami? This guy must live there.

SPEAKER_05 26:56

I actually haven't been to Miami, but I think so.

SPEAKER_01 26:58

I mean, I think it's similar to Scottsdale women, LA. Like I've like, yeah, the bougie kind of superficial cities. I think all the women are kind of falling in.

SPEAKER_02 27:10

And it's gonna be different horses, different courses. Some guys like all that, you know?

SPEAKER_05 27:13

I think it too. Like you just think of Scottsa, like because I've never been to Miami, but like there's pockets, right? Like, are you an old time during the day or you're during the afternoon? Like the coffee shops, the you know, are you there on Tuesday at 9 a.m.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

or are you there Saturday at 3 a.m. 3 a.m. Yeah, or 2 p.m., 9 a.m. or 3 a.m. Yeah, exactly. That's so true. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:33

And I kind of agree with this one. The number one type of women you should avoid is are attention tings. They love attention from guys, from girls, from social media. They're obsessed with getting attention. That's got to be exhausting and getting old, right?

SPEAKER_01 27:46

I think so. Well, yeah, we kind of talked about that with the social media stuff. Like if you're constantly, if that's the reason why you're doing your social media, that's unattractive. Right.

SPEAKER_05 27:54

Are you getting fulfillment from posting to see who likes it? Or are you doing it? Yeah, what's the what's the heart behind it?

SPEAKER_02 28:00

It's kind of cringe to see some of the posts out there and you can tell it's just women needing attention. And it's like, oh, you know. Hurts. I'm so glad social media was not around when I was younger. Oh my god, I know.

A Brutal First Date Prank Story

SPEAKER_02 28:10

Now it's time for the celebrity cut. Well, we marinate in the juices of the celebrities. So we are going to chat about something one of our followers on TikTok messaged us about because all of our followers are celebrities. Um, legitimately, this guy, Matt, messaged us. Did you I don't know if you read the I don't think I did.

SPEAKER_01 28:26

I don't think I did. I think I did.

SPEAKER_02 28:27

So we wanted to share this first date story. Okay. It's first date. So this is what he says. It was my freshman year of college, and there was this big party during welcome week that everyone was going to. There was this girl that I had a crush on that I knew from high school. And so I asked her if she wanted to meet up at the party. She said yes. This college was very much into pranks and Greek life, probably ASU. So unfortunately, when I got there, I found myself to be the target of one of these pranks as I was a freshman. Long story short, some of the frat guys stripped me naked, hog tied me with duct tape, and stuffed my socks into my mouth so I couldn't talk, and then left me like this on the front lawn of the party. And I was like, oh my god, that's tragic. I'm so sorry. How long were you there for? The entire party for hours until the party finished. Just him. Just him. And I was like, did anyone help you or untie you? No, no one did. Dang. Like, would you, if I saw someone like that, I would help them and untie them and you know, give them some of my clothing.

SPEAKER_04 29:27

Do you think you need some socks?

SPEAKER_02 29:29

It's so sad to me that people do that. Isn't that mean?

SPEAKER_05 29:31

What's mean? Fraternity hazing, that's definitely a big thing. Like in like the South, like Auburn, Old Miss, like Lelish, like it's just a big like culture thing, but it's definitely not healthy.

SPEAKER_02 29:42

I'm so against that hazing. You hear don't people pass away from hazing stories?

SPEAKER_05 29:47

It gets way too serious. Um, my my hazing was in basketball. I didn't do like a fraternity or you know, anything like that. But um, my freshman year of high school, the the hazing was you know have a no-guard over your hair and your eyebrows, so we all just look like cancer patients, like playing basketball. It was terrible. But that's that's the limit. Like it, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 30:06

It just yeah, I my brother and bait, they used to bleach their hair. Yeah, and kind of similar. Like, no matter how dark your hair was, you had to bleach. Bunch of slim shadies. Yes, yeah. It's funny.

SPEAKER_02 30:16

Don't a lot of people like force people to drink like a bunch of liquor and then they end up dying. Like, that's crazy to me. That's happened, yeah. Didn't we? We had a guest on that his hazing was to do laundry, remember? I'm like, okay, that's easy hazing doing someone's laundry, that's not bad.

SPEAKER_04 30:32

Definitely better than that.

SPEAKER_02 30:33

Now it's time to get to know you with Zoya, sponsored by Zoya, your neighborhood yogurt.

Deal Breakers First Dates And Closing Qs

SPEAKER_02 30:37

Rapid fire questions. Are these red flags or no? She still follows her ex on Instagram.

SPEAKER_05 30:42

Oh god, this is supposed to be rapid fire.

SPEAKER_02 30:44

Um It's okay, we can chat about them.

SPEAKER_05 30:46

Yeah, I don't think like if it depends on the how it ended, right? Like how that dynamic like ended.

SPEAKER_02 30:53

If it was Are you okay with your girlfriends still being friends with their exes? Hanging out with them, chatting with them? No.

SPEAKER_05 30:59

I don't think it's needed.

SPEAKER_02 31:01

Yeah. Um they they're bad tippers.

SPEAKER_05 31:04

Bad tippers. I think um that should be the man's responsibility in general. I mean, I normally have a heart for generosity, so I think that's not their responsibility.

SPEAKER_02 31:15

We didn't talk about this. What are your deal breakers?

SPEAKER_05 31:17

Deal breakers. Um I think faith, uh just being important to themselves and standing for something. Um I think fitness, uh for sure, taking care of their body, taking care of their mind. Um, and I think that um man, I think just someone who's like adventurous, spontaneous, likes to get out, likes to explore, not just like stay in one space, one bubble. Um No OnlyFans.

SPEAKER_02 31:42

Yeah, no.

SPEAKER_05 31:43

That's probably yeah, no OnlyFans for a boy.

SPEAKER_02 31:46

Is it a deal breaker for you if someone is rude to the staff, like at a restaurant?

SPEAKER_05 31:51

If it's like a scenario where I don't think I don't think I'd justify, yeah, I'd say no. Like I'd why be rude to someone who's trying to serve you and bring you a good experience.

SPEAKER_02 31:59

Yeah. Um what if they have no social media?

SPEAKER_05 32:02

No social media? It's not a deal breaker.

SPEAKER_02 32:05

Where should someone not take you on a first date? But I guess you're a man, so you normally take where do you take someone on a first date?

SPEAKER_05 32:11

It's a good question. I I like to go, depending on the person, I like to go like out, like to either on a hike, uh, probably not in the summer, but like something like uh I've been trying to do so. I go to Lifetime, uh, all the lifetimes, so I have access there, so I don't have to do a guest pass. And some girls I'll do like a cold plunge sauna like walk and talk. Let's start on the treadmill and do a walk-and-talk, and then we'll go and like cold plunge sauna, like co-ed and just kind of a personal to get to get to know somebody doing some hard things together. Um, also knowing that like that's not for every woman.

SPEAKER_00 32:42

So I was gonna say that sounds like Lindsay's first date nightmare. What you just described. I was thinking that I was like, you're describing Lindsay's nightmare right now.

SPEAKER_05 32:56

Yeah, give me some, yeah, that's right. First, um, I think also nothing wrong with a coffee, coffee and connect, um, and just hearing someone's story here in their background, and like what what drives like I like to say the one question I like to ask is what drives you and what drains you? Um what what brings you joy and what you know doesn't.

SPEAKER_02 33:14

Do you like cold plunges? It sounds mis I've never like you do? I hate being cold.

SPEAKER_01 33:18

I can't think of anything like it's like, but it's a weird type of cold because it's a cold that almost like is painful. So what's appealing about that?

SPEAKER_05 33:27

Because it reveals yourself. Wow in your body. It reveals like where it's almost like a mindset thing, right? You work, focus on your breath, you focus on grounding yourself if your heart rate gets up really fast. Like, how can you slow down? Because you know, you think of like someone who starts their day off working out, right? It calibrates everything else. So if I can start off doing something hard, then I'm calibrating myself to like knowing adversity, there's nothing harder than I'm gonna do the rest of the day than a 40-degree cold plunge.

SPEAKER_02 33:55

So you sit in there for how long?

SPEAKER_05 33:57

It's really just two to three minutes for me. It depends.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

But um I think I read somewhere though that it came out that that's actually not good for you. People used to think it was good for you, but I think there's I have to look into that. But I think research now shows that it's actually not beneficiars.

SPEAKER_01 34:11

There's there's there's a lot of research. There's mixed reviews. I say therapy. I would say in like the therapy world for a cold cold.

SPEAKER_02 34:17

I think it was on John Jay and Richard's actually. I think John Jay came. I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 34:20

After my take is just like after workout, it's not good for you because you just broke down and tore your muscles down. And then if you do a cold plunge, it like reverse, you know, the effect. Um, but yeah, I normally do it like midday for me, kind of a sometimes the early morning or midday. Um, so yeah.

SPEAKER_02 34:36

Interesting. Is watching porn considered cheating?

SPEAKER_05 34:38

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 34:40

Before you're intimate with someone, is it appropriate to ask them how many people they've been with?

SPEAKER_05 34:44

I think that come up before that conversation, that moment. Um like just a natural, like I don't think right before that. I don't know, that just sounds right on the spot. Like, what's the point?

SPEAKER_02 34:54

Is it acceptable to have sex on a first date?

unknown 34:57

No.

SPEAKER_02 34:58

Besides basketball, do you have any other talents that not many people know of? Or a unique fact about yourself that not many people know?

SPEAKER_05 35:05

That's a good question. I um I enjoy reading. I enjoy um I enjoy the um yeah, just like the adventure, the spontaneity, I've mentioned that a couple of times.

SPEAKER_01 35:19

Um what are you reading right now?

SPEAKER_05 35:22

Uh I'm reading a lot of scripture, actually. Um Proverbs. So it's a book of wisdom. Um just gaining more wisdom and more insight there. Um outside of that, I'm reading there's a book. Um it's actually like a devotional by Zig Ziglar. Um so he's big on mindset, big on like personal development, and so that's been kind of cool tying it in with like the faith side of things.

SPEAKER_02 35:48

Um What is your type physically?

SPEAKER_05 35:51

Physically, um I'd say I mentioned like the height of like you know, that 5'6 to 5'10 or so. Um healthy, you know, meaning like they just take care of themselves and they you know eat decent and like um I don't know. It's not like a like I'm not a like people say a butt guy or you know, whatever. Like I I don't know. That that's just you don't like big butts? And you cannot lie. Um that's just not what I go for.

SPEAKER_02 36:25

Like it's just like, oh, that's so you're more like not so much physical, but more about the person.

SPEAKER_05 36:30

Yeah, the person, I guess it's longevity, right? What's true? What's that goes away? Like I'm I'm seriously pursuing a woman who's I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with, and if the first thing I'm attracted to is her body, then what if that goes away? It might be a good thing. It's true, and it will, yeah. Um and I've someone I've dated has been attracted just to the physical, and we've had that conversation, like, you know, so yeah.

SPEAKER_02 36:51

Couple last questions. In one sentence, why should someone date you?

SPEAKER_05 36:55

You should date me because I want to make you feel safe, seen, and served. And if I can do those three things, then I'm gonna be your man.

SPEAKER_02 37:04

So nice. And last but not least, what is your favorite sexual position and why? End with a bang.

SPEAKER_04 37:10

Literally. Oh man.

SPEAKER_05 37:16

Um just face to face, being intimate, being uh heart to heart.

unknown 37:23

Nice.

SPEAKER_02 37:24

Thank you so much for joining us this week at the meat market, and thank you so much, Dylan. If you want to snag a date with Dylan, go to any of our social media platforms at Meat Market Podcast. And thank you to our sponsor, Tactical Tax Strategies. If you want to preserve your wealth and keep more of your own money in your own wallet where it belongs, you need to go to Tactical Tax Strategies. We'll see you next week at the Meat Market.