THAT TIKTOK CHEATING DRAMA EVERYONE’S TALKING ABOUT? WE SPILLS THE TEA!

Catfish Claims And Meet Abby

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Oh my god, I just totally got catfished. He looks absolutely nothing like his picture. So I found out the guy that I've been dating is married with kids. His wife just reached out to me.

SPEAKER_00 0:15

Welcome to the meat market. The single scene is the slaughterhouse, and we are here to devour it. We are your hosts. I'm Lindsay. I'm Jess. And today's sizzling single is Abby. Welcome.

SPEAKER_01 0:24

Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

So you have a crazy cheating story that went viral. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 0:28

We want to hear it. Okay. It's a story, so strap in. So it was actually, it all started on my one year anniversary. Um, I was living with a guy, and I woke up and, like, you know the feeling. Like, girls get it. And it was just like, I woke up and I was like, something's wrong. It's just nothing was wrong. Like, everything was great, but I woke up and I was like, something feels different. I need to be sneaky. So I looked through his phone and I found a video of him making out with a girl at a bar. Yeah. How old was the video from a couple weeks prior when I was out of town? I was on a bachelorette trip.

unknown 1:02

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 1:02

And I found this video and I was like, let me do a little more investigating. Looked through the rest of his phone, found grinder.

The Anniversary Gut Feeling

SPEAKER_02 1:10

Oh. Yeah. And then I looked through the ring camera footage from that weekend, and he had brought that girl home and a guy. Mmm. Yeah.

unknown 1:19

Whoa.

SPEAKER_02 1:19

So I went ballistic, like, but in a silent way. I immediately like just red. You know, like you just see red. And so I changed his background to a screenshot of him making out with that girl. Good for you. I did the whole like music video thing. I wrote cheater and red lipstick, like on our bathroom mirror. I was like, all right, if I'm gonna do it, I'm I'm gonna do it big. And then I went downstairs and I put the living room TV on a video that I looked up on YouTube called What to Do When Your Girlfriend Finds Out You Cheated on Her. Put it on a loop. I put it on the volume and I left and I went to work. And I wrote him a little note that was like, get out. I never want to see you again. And I left. And then I came home and he was gone. He was gone. He was gone. And I was like, I packed up and I left. Um, and I ended up, you know, going through a whole mental crisis. And then it got worse because he ended up stealing a bunch of my stuff. Like what? My patio furniture, my bar stools, my roomba, all this stuff when I went back to go get all my things. So I was like, how do you have the audacity to cheat on me and take all my things? So I did the only thing I could do, and I posted it on TikTok and it went viral and it blew up. And he's, please take it down. All my coworkers are seeing this. Like everyone's talking to me about this. I was like, no, you act how you want to act, and I'll make sure everybody knows about it. You made your bed nice. Yep.

SPEAKER_04 2:47

And did you get a feeling the weekend that you like the weekend that it actually happened? Was he at like shape acting shady at all?

SPEAKER_02 2:54

He was texting me like, oh, I'm going home now, like I'm out at the bar, like being a perfect boyfriend, you know, doing all the right things. So I had no idea at the time, like that anything happened. Did he forget you have security cameras? Literally, I was like, we have a ring camera. Like, you think I'm not gonna walk around to this? Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 3:14

Well, it's funny because like even my neighbor, my neighbor texted me yesterday and she was like, our electrician tried to go accidentally went to your house instead of ours, like just in case you notice on your ring cam, like someone trying to come into your house. So it's like, people, how do people not like we're getting in the new era, right? How do people not think that if you have your camera up like Big Brother?

SPEAKER_05 3:38

In Belgium, Big Brother in this situation, like I am watching like this all the time.

SPEAKER_02 3:43

I don't know how people think they can like get away with stuff like that nowadays. So yeah, I posted the next day, I posted the video initially of him making out with that girl on my Instagram, everything, and I was like, this is not me. Before I even made the TikTok. Like I texted all of his friends, I texted his mom, I told everybody what he did to me. I was not being shy about it because I'm not gonna be scorned. Okay. I will let everybody know. I'm not gonna suffer inside. Do you think this was the only time?

SPEAKER_04 4:13

I've thought about that because he had the grinder app. Right.

SPEAKER_02 4:16

So then you almost think it's like he was being sneaky behind my back, but I don't know that he like actually did anything physical until that time that I caught it. But I'll never know. And I'm okay with never knowing because at the end of the day, it still happened. So but you said everything was fine prior to that? Yeah. That's weird. I had no like inkling. I had no weird feelings until I literally woke up. I woke up early because I was gonna make him breakfast for our one-year anniversary, like before I went to work. And I just woke up and my gut was like turning, and I was like, ooh, why do I feel like this? Like and I'll look through a man's phone. I have no shame in it, and I'll tell them like when I start seeing them, like I might look through your phone if I get a weird feeling. So And so did he end up with that girl? Or no, I tried so hard to find that girl and I never found her. Did he have any explanation? The usual. The it was a mistake, it only happened one time, I was drunk. Was it a threesome? He says no, but what did he say the other guy?

SPEAKER_04 5:20

Just hanging out.

SPEAKER_02 5:21

He said he told me they came home together and stayed at our apartment. Those two. They needed a place to stay, so he brought them home. I'm like, how dumb do you really think I am? Right. So how I'm like a girl, like I'm not he would never ever own up to it. And like that, that's just the kind of guy that he was. Even when I confronted him, like about like if you're gay, that's fine. Like, I don't care. Genuinely, like, or buy. I I'll be with anyone who loves anyone, that's fine by me. Like, but it's the fact that you're hiding it and being sneaky that I'm like, I don't, I don't mess with that. So like just be honest. And he would never own up to it. And I was like, what about

Going Viral After Betrayal

SPEAKER_02 6:00

grinder? Oh, a friend downloaded it on my phone because he wanted he wanted to see what it was like, and he's gay, and he he's never been on there. I was like, You're just you're never gonna own up to it. And I just had to get okay with like not getting answers. Did he beg you back? Oh, he begged me back. He begged me back, he wanted to buy me plane tickets to come back and see him. And then there's another video, um, actually, because I went back for my stuff and I got so much hate for this, which is fair. Um, I I let him pick me up from the airport the day that I went back to get my things because I was like, we can talk. Like, I'm it's been a few weeks, I'm not as mad. We'll figure like to be cordial. We're not getting back together ever, like Taylor Swift said. But I was like, we can talk at least, right? And he's begging and crying, and he was recording me on his phone on the way back home from the airport, like audio recording me because he thought I was gonna like slip up and say something crazy.

SPEAKER_04 6:56

So he was like, he was trying to create his own viral moment. Yes, to get back. He was to get back.

SPEAKER_02 7:01

He was so your viral moment, and then stupidly he told me later, he was like, Oh yeah, I was recording you in the car because I thought you were gonna say something. And I was like, So then I sent it to myself. Like, I still knew his password. So I sent it to myself, and then I had the video of him being crazy in the car, and I was like, You really messed up because what a dumb! I was like, you know, I can find this stuff and I'm gonna send it. And then I posted that too. Oh my god, that's hilarious. His plan backfired.

SPEAKER_04 7:29

Yeah, well, you get what you get. And he'll probably the unfortunate thing is you doing that to him will just make him smarter for hiding it for the next relationship.

SPEAKER_02 7:43

Me and his ex are like this. Like, I love his ex-girlfriend. We are so cool. And after all this happened, of course, then she feels comfortable enough to tell me like all the things that he did to her. And I'm like, girl, you could have saved me like a whole year, but you know, it's hard, you know, because you never know if a girl's gonna react and be like, they believe you or they don't.

SPEAKER_00 8:03

And I feel like a lot of girls don't choose to believe the woman because the guy's poisoning their and oh, she's the crazy one, they have to experience it for themselves.

SPEAKER_02 8:10

Yes, it's such a hard thing because I've I feel like every girl has almost been on both ends, you know, where a girl is like reaching out to you and you're like, Do I want to believe this? But the older I've gotten, the more I'm like, I will always believe the girl. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:23

If they're trying to warn you, and I feel like women always think they're the exception. Well, he was like this with other women's different with mixed up. He doesn't act like that to me. He's so nice. Because I'm the one, he wants to marry me. He just didn't want to marry you.

SPEAKER_04 8:38

We all want that, but like realistically, it's like, do they though? It's so true. And it always comes back around. Like you hear about it, that's kind of it my what happened with my ex was kind of similar to that. And I I because I thought about should I tell her like what really he he's into? And I was like, you know what? No, I'm just I need to just like separate myself completely and yada yada. Well, I heard recently from someone who still knows him and his mutual friends that it's the same and they're Rocky, and it's the exact same reasons, and so it's just like it never changes. Like it doesn't, it never changes.

SPEAKER_02 9:21

You you think and you hope that it will, but I just I pray for the next girl, you know, that like is in his path because he was so good about it. Like, I had no no idea. Yeah, is he you in town? He's in Georgia. Well, he's in Florida now, so like we'll never see each other again, but thank God.

Moving For Love And Lease Lessons

SPEAKER_02 9:40

But like, I don't know. I'm just I deleted him off everything. I just completely cold turned out. So did you move from there to here? I'm a travel nurse. Ah, okay. So I'm okay I'm everywhere. Okay, okay. So you were just there on like a job. Um, so we met on a cruise, actually, is how me and him met. Um, and then I took a contract in Georgia where he lived. Okay. For him. For him.

SPEAKER_00 10:04

Oh, okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 10:04

And then did you move in with him or did you guys move in together? I moved in with him. You moved in with him. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:10

And then after like six months, we got a place together.

SPEAKER_04 10:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 10:14

So that lease was up and my name was on the lease, which girls don't sign a lease with a man. Okay. That's my advice. Don't do it. Um, don't put your name on that because you still have to pay if you're not living there. And that sucks. Were both of your names on the lease? Yes.

SPEAKER_04 10:30

Okay. Yeah. Either it has to be all yours or all his. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 10:35

I think.

SPEAKER_04 10:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:36

I've learned so much from that. Like, I'm I'm grateful that like I came out on the other side and I'm not like a tragic mess and I don't like have a lot of um like hatred towards men because I feel like that's an easy thing to fall into nowadays, is like the I hate men agenda, you know? Um and it's kind of fun and silly, but at the same time, like I I want a true relationship, and like I have a lot of men in my life that I love, and like I know that that's not how all men are. It's just I have a way of picking

Creepy Dating App Messages

SPEAKER_02 11:05

the the ones that are that way.

SPEAKER_00 11:06

So what is the creepiest thing someone said to you on the dating apps? I saw that little caption on your TikTok.

SPEAKER_02 11:13

That was freaking creepy. I have so many. I actually screenshot all of the ones that are like funny or weird. Um, and I'm banned from Hinge and Tinder. Why for doing that?

SPEAKER_04 11:26

I don't know why. I have no idea why. Yeah, guys must be reporting you. Probably. You're put you're putting them on blast for being creepy, and then they're going in and reporting to all of the apps. Two years at this point. Yeah, it must be. Because that guest that we just had on said that just be that guy was mad at her and literally just reported her Instagram profile to Instagram, like just to be petty.

SPEAKER_02 11:49

Yeah. So I don't know what I did. Honestly, like I wasn't using it like as a true dating app back then either. To be, it was more of like, I was using it as like a Task Rabbit before Task Rabbit was a thing. My Tinderby would be like my AC's fixed, like need a handyman. Like my car's making a weird noise, like, we'll go on a date if you can fix it. Like, that's kind of how I was using dating apps. So when I got banned, I was like not shocked, you know, but I was like, damn, like that kind of sucks. So now I only have um Facebook dating, which is wild. I didn't even realize that was like a thing. Um, and bumble. So that's what I'm working with now. But yeah, the craziest thing, oh my gosh, um, I've had someone say, like, I want to worship your socked feet. Um like start a religion, I'm ready to worship you.

SPEAKER_00 12:36

Just like the whole nine, like I saw the one that said, if you were my girl, I would chew your food and spit it into your mouth and call you baby bird.

SPEAKER_04 12:46

So disgusting. I can't, that makes me want to throw up in my mouth right now. That's sick.

SPEAKER_02 12:52

I have an entire album and it's called Streets because these streets are crazy out here. And I just screenshot all of the ones that I'm like, this is insane. Like, I can't believe people like do men think that's gonna work? That's so gross. Truly. Some if they're funny enough and like they're cute enough, I'll respond. But if it's like just weird, I'm like, you really think some like that's gonna do the trick?

SPEAKER_00 13:14

Like, that is

Dating At Work And Doctor Egos

SPEAKER_00 13:15

insane. Oh my goodness. So you are a travel nurse. Have you ever dated any doctors that you work with or co-workers?

SPEAKER_02 13:22

I try not to because it gets really, really messy. Um, but I feel like nurses, especially in the emergency department, which is where I usually work, are notorious for like having a little mess around. Um, I have dated one person at work. Um, he was a paramedic, and just for a couple weeks, and nothing, it didn't end badly or anything like that. But I've seen where it gets really weird. Like when someone is dropping off a patient and you have dated that person and you're trying to avoid them, but you're in a situation where you literally cannot. Um, it's very awkward for everyone in there.

SPEAKER_04 14:00

There was one of those like POV reels going viral not long ago where it was like POV, you're an you're a nurse in the ED, and all of a sudden your entire roster walks in and it's like all the firemen and the EMGs.

SPEAKER_02 14:12

And I had a girl um come into the emergency department that I had met at the bar the weekend prior. Oh, that's hilarious. Like, I know you and I was like, No, we I'm new. I just started this contract, I've only been here two weeks. She was like, No, I swear I met you. And I was like, I don't think so. And then later she was like, I met you at the bar last weekend. We did shots together, and I was like, Oh my god. That's so funny. Right.

SPEAKER_05 14:36

Yep, don't tell anybody here about that machine for something alcohol related.

SPEAKER_01 14:42

But I don't want to date date my.

SPEAKER_02 14:45

But I was like, oh no. But no, I try not to date at work.

SPEAKER_00 14:48

Um what do you think of doctors? Because we always read these lists, like the most narcissistic men, and doctors are always up there, the biggest cheaters, doctors are up there. Is that how they truly are?

SPEAKER_02 14:58

I think it depends, which is gonna sound kind of crazy on their specialty. Like a lot of the high adrenaline, like ER trauma, ortho bros are like ortho bros are like the finance of healthcare, the finance frozen healthcare. Like I'm thinking of the orthodox. Yes, and it's exactly, it's so true. Like they are just like, I don't know, man. Like they just they they date around quite a lot. Um, if you get a cute little like internal medicine doctor, they're usually more like they love their slice of humble pie. They're they're pretty chill. But I think it depends on the specialty. But surgeons, you don't want to play with surgeons. Really? Their ego is just and they're gonna hate me for saying this. And I love them, but I would never date a surgeon. Because they play around, cheetahs. They play around, they their ego is genuinely like why is that? Because they make a lot of money, they make a lot of money, they are intelligent, they're super intelligent, but like they think they play God every day, truly, you know, like they are the definition between life and death for people every day, and it it gets to their heads. And I think you have a a certain personality

Bipolar Dating And Medication Reality

SPEAKER_02 16:05

trait to be a surgeon that I'm not interested in dating.

SPEAKER_00 16:08

Yeah. But so you are very open about being bipolar. Does that affect your dating life?

SPEAKER_02 16:16

Yes. Um, I didn't know that I was bipolar for a long time. Um, I was recently diagnosed in the last year, which being diagnosed has helped so much me understand myself and like how I see dating. Um, but usually I tell guys that I'm bipolar, and nowadays everyone's like, ooh, I love a crazy girl. Like, oh, I love a bipolar baddie. Like, oh hilarious. My personal Harley Quinn. I'm like, no, it's for real. Like, you think it's funny until I'm like raised. Having a mental break and like crying. Like, then it's different. But no, I think um it it does affect my dating life just in the fact that I need someone who will be more understanding that like I have to take my meds every day. This is something that won't go away. Um, I had a guy that I was seeing, I told him that I was bipolar and like I'm regulated, I'm on meds now. I feel so much better. So it's really not something that you have to worry about. And he was like, well, you know, you can just stop your meds whenever you want. And you know, it's not, you know, something that you need to worry about. I was like, no, no, no, no, you don't understand that. Like, this is something for life. I have to be on meds and regulated.

SPEAKER_00 17:26

So, how did you realize you were you needed to go see a doctor or address this? I what is bipolar? I don't really know too much about it.

SPEAKER_02 17:32

So bipolar, um, I'm bipolar one. There's bipolar one and there's bipolar two. And they're categorized by like severity almost in different uh highs and lows. So bipolar one, you have had an experience with mania or psychosis, or you've been hospitalized for your bipolar. Bipolar two is more hypomania. So mania is you're you're very high. And everyone loves when I'm manic because I'm the most fun person in the world. Um I don't sleep, I spend money, I'm buying everybody everything, I'm out all the time. But then after the high comes the low. So I'll be shut in. I don't want to go out, I don't want to do anything. Um, but I've always been very um, I guess, in my own head about it. My family, friends, everybody was shocked when I was diagnosed because they were like, no, no, no, that doesn't seem right. You're because everyone has a stigma about bipolar, right? Like you think like they fly off the handle and they're just insane all the time. You never know if they're gonna be up or down. Um, but that's just not true.

SPEAKER_04 18:30

But people often also, when someone has mood swings, they're like, oh, she's so bipolar. And if that's not it. It can be. So it's like it's not mood swings. Bipolar doesn't mean that you're in a good mood one second and you're in a bad mood the next second.

SPEAKER_01 18:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 18:46

And I think that's where the confusion lies because people use the term bipolar to describe someone's mood swings.

SPEAKER_02 18:54

Yes, all the time.

SPEAKER_04 18:55

And that's not that's not that's not the case.

SPEAKER_02 18:58

Yeah, I'm not just gonna like right now freak out on you guys for no reason, you know. Like it's just emotions hit me differently. Um, I feel things a lot deeper than maybe the average bear would, you know. Um, but basically it's a it's a chemical imbalance in your brain of like the chemicals that make you happy and the chemicals that make you sad are never regulated. So you're either high, low, sometimes you're in the middle and you're just like a normal person. But when you get flooded with those feelings, it's a lie. So if I'm manic, I'm like all-time high. And if I'm depressed, I'm all time low. Which everyone has those feelings. Everybody feels good and everybody feels bad. It's just in bipolar those chemicals set you off even more than the typical person. So the meds that I'm on, I'm on an antipsychotic and a mood stabilizer to help me just keep those level, if that makes sense. And I I feel so much better now that I know. Um what sent me there initially, I always knew that something was wrong. Um but I never wanted to admit it because I I was a perfectionist growing up and I never wanted anything to be wrong with me. So I refused to like go see a doctor or anything like that. And honestly, after that breakup, um I ended up voluntarily admitting myself to the psych ward because it put me in stress that can like uh trigger mania or depression. And I was obviously very stressed at that time, and then I went into a manic episode. So I ended up involuntarily checking into the psych ward because I I didn't know at the time I was bipolar, but I was like, something's wrong. Like I don't know what's wrong, but something's wrong. So I checked myself in and that's where I was diagnosed.

SPEAKER_00 20:41

And do you find that when you tell guys are you open about it when you date? Yeah. Do you tell them like on the first date or after you've gotten to know them?

SPEAKER_02 20:48

I usually tell them on the first date, or honestly, it's in my profile. Oh, really? Yeah. Um, I have one of my like options as like uh one of the things is like three words that describe you, and it's my three meds that I'm on. That's three words that describe this problem. Because I'm an open book about it, and I'll never be shy about it. I'll never like turn away from the conversation. Um, and it's different for everyone how they want to go about it, but I'm I'm so upfront and I'm so open that I would rather just lay my cards on the table. Have you ever had a guy that's just like pass? I'm walking away from the no? Never. I've never had someone think that it was like a red flag. Uh they probably do, but they don't tell me. But I've never had someone that stopped seeing me because of it. But I have thrown it had it thrown in my face.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

Oh no. That's not fair. That's not fair at all.

SPEAKER_02 21:42

For sure. Like if you argue with someone and then they're like, now I see why you're bipolar. And it's like that's just because we're arguing doesn't mean and that's kind of like what I was saying before.

SPEAKER_04 21:53

Like, people want to use it as like a oh, you're bipolar in this moment because you're not saying something. That I like.

SPEAKER_02 22:01

And then throughout the whole time, they'll be like, I can't believe you're bipolar. I can't, you know, I would never know. And then the one time you're arguing. That we're arguing. And then it's like, oh, I see it now. It's like, no, we're just mad and I'm just in a bad mood. You're like, I'm literally just in a bad mood. I'm allowed to be mad and sad and happy too, just like a normal person. Yeah. So yeah, it's weird when it comes to dating. I'm still new to it because I've been only been diagnosed for a year. So it is still like something I'm kind of figuring out. But for the most part, like people have been pretty nice about it. And like I said, they get excited because there's that stigma. I've had a lot of guys be like, oh, you know what they say about crazy girls, you know? And I'm like, what do they say? You know, say it. What do they say? And they're like, oh, oh, oh, uh.

SPEAKER_04 22:43

You're like they kill their husbands. I'm like, did you watch Gone Girl?

SPEAKER_00 22:48

Like

Height Lies And Bad Banter Dates

SPEAKER_00 22:50

what is the craziest fest date you've ever been on? Do you have any disaster date stories?

SPEAKER_02 22:55

Oh, I have been on, well, there was this one guy that I matched with on a dating app, and it his profile said that he was like 6'2. And I was looking at the pictures and I was like, he doesn't look 6'2. You know, you can just tell. Stand a picture in front of a doorway. And you're like, yeah, that tall, but whatever. Like, I love a short thing too. And so I messaged him and I was like, we were planning a date, and I was like, are you actually 6'2? And he was like, I guess you'll find out. Oh god, no. And we show up and he's my height. I'm 5'4. No! Yeah. I was like, I think it's 6'2. 6'2.

SPEAKER_04 23:33

I feel like that's a game. Like that's a joke. That's a little too different.

SPEAKER_02 23:37

You're gonna find that out too. Like, that's not something you can lie about.

SPEAKER_00 23:40

And I'm not gonna, I guess you'll find out. I was like, okay, you're I think I would have been like, okay, I'm not going on the date. You're clearly hiding things. You're not being honest.

SPEAKER_02 23:48

Yeah, I don't know why. I'm like, I'll give any guy a chance. And I that is my problem. What did he say when you met him? I was like, oh, you're not 6'2, and he was like, haha, I guess not. Well, or you think, like, okay, 5'10, whatever.

SPEAKER_04 24:00

Like maybe for an inch or two. Like, yeah, like at least he'll still be taller than me. You know, 5'10, 5'11. Yeah, fine.

SPEAKER_02 24:07

And then I offered to split the check at the end of dinner, and we were supposed to get drinks. And if I'm offering, if I'm gonna split the check truly, we're not going on another date, in my opinion. Um, because I think the man should pay for the first date. So I was like, okay, let's like, do you want to split the bill? And he was like, I've never had a girl offer that before. And I was like, well, buddy, you're about to, and we're not going for drinks after this. He was nice, but I was just like, Did he make you split it? Oh, we split it, yeah. Oh dang. We split it. And then I was he was like, Okay, let's go grab drinks. And I was like, actually, I think I'm gonna pass. No, thank you. Did you follow up with him after that? He messaged me and he was like, I had so much fun. And I was just like, Yeah, I don't think it's gonna work, but thank you. It was nice meeting you.

SPEAKER_04 24:52

Because at that point, when I dig into his own, I'm not gonna, yeah, and he's not gonna change. He's not gonna change the way that he I wish I could look now and see if he's gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_02 25:00

Right.

SPEAKER_04 25:01

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 25:02

Have you ever walked out mid-date? No, I have not. I I have had times where I wanted to. I was messaging with this guy, and he was just one of those like negging guys. Do you know what I mean by that? Like he wanted to like fake argue, and like he was kind of mean to me, like over texts, like not in a cute way, like not a good banter. It was like, okay, like whatever.

SPEAKER_04 25:26

Like he thought it was banter, but it really like he was just an asshole.

SPEAKER_02 25:30

Yeah, he was just a jerk. And I had posted a video about that too. I was like going on a date, and I already know it's gonna be bad. Like, and and people love to just humble me in my comments, and they're like, You're stupid. Why would you even go if you know it's gonna be bad? And I'm like, I don't know. I'm gonna give him a chance. What if he's nice in person? You never know. Like, it could be my dream man, he just is bad at flirting. Not the case. He was just as bad in person. And I was sitting there and I was like, Oh my god, like, how long can I make this like this one coffee? We went for coffee. I was like, I need to drink this coffee as fast as I possibly can to get out of here. Because he just did the same thing. Like, he was like, it was like not the fun bullying. It was like, well, why would you say that? Like, that's kind of stupid. Why would you like condescending? Yeah, and he was like, This is not cute. Like, I don't think this is cute at all.

SPEAKER_04 26:18

Are you ready for it? I'm ready for it.

The Listener Who Got Heaven Zoned

SPEAKER_04 26:20

The keep more minute, sponsored by Tactical Tax Strategies. They help you keep more in your wallet, we help you keep more in your relationship. All right, so we have a listener question. How would you react to this? Before going on a date with this girl, she was texting me a lot and sent me, like, not kidding, 20 selfies. After the date ended, I noticed that her communication began lacking, and I asked her if she wanted to meet again. She dodged a little bit, and then when I asked her again, she said it would not be a good idea because we haven't really been communicating a lot. I then told her, that's fine. Thank you, and I wish you the best. You're a great person, and I have nothing against you. Then she responds with, Aw, thank you. So are you. And just knowing I have a true brother in Christ and you is amazing. I know we'll see each other in heaven. Wish you nothing but the best as well, and feel free to reach out anytime for prayer or anything with a smiley face. I mean, I understand people friend zoning and stuff, but heaven zoned is a first for me. Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_05 27:32

Wait, that's actually iconic. Like, good for her.

SPEAKER_04 27:38

I don't think I don't think I'd respond. I wouldn't respond. I'd maybe give it like a heart. I'd like like it. I'd like love it. I'd give it a little heart. I think. Oh my gosh. But I think that would be the end for me.

SPEAKER_02 27:48

I don't think I'd like to had had conversations regarding religion. Religion at all. Or in this is totally out of left field because I feel like that would like make it make a little more sense. Like if he was a super Christian too, then like okay, like that's but it sounds like he's not. It's like he's less.

SPEAKER_00 28:06

Was she serious or was she like being facetious? I'm not I'm not 100% joke. I feel like that's a good way to get it going not as a Jewish.

SPEAKER_04 28:15

So I would have ha ha'd it. Yeah, like after every sentence, so his text, so he put the text in quotes. I wish he would have sent like a screenshot of the text conversation because his thank you and wish you the best. You're a great person. I have nothing against you. Just have periods at the end. Hers, ah, thank you. So are you, exclamation point. And just knowing I have a true brother in Christ in you is amazing. Exclamation point. It could be facetious. She could be being just like snarky. Right.

SPEAKER_02 28:49

I don't know, but I feel like she's I feel like she might just be saying that with her whole chest.

SPEAKER_04 28:54

I know. I feel like I wouldn't react with a response. It just needs a reaction. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 29:02

And I love to react with like the funny, like I have saved stickers of like my dog and like stuff like that. So I would probably just give it like a weird, like me, weird sticker that's like we're acknowledging that this was weird as can I swear on you? Yeah. We're acknowledging that this is weird as fuck. But I'm still gonna like kind of respond to you without actually responding to you. Yeah, that's strange. And like I'm a Christian, but like I'm not ever, unless I want a guided, I might steal that.

SPEAKER_05 29:33

I'm like trying to get rid of being in fact, I don't think it's gonna work out.

SPEAKER_04 29:39

My brother We will be together. We will have each other again.

SPEAKER_00 29:45

He could be like, no, wait, I didn't know you were a godly woman. That is true, but that is true.

SPEAKER_02 29:51

In Arizona, I don't know like what the vibes are out here yet, like if it's very traditional in that way.

SPEAKER_04 29:56

I feel like not so much, but I feel like the younger generation, it just I think it depends on the age range, what you're dating. I feel like the older generations are more conservative and traditional. So that wouldn't work for them in the I think so. Yeah, and especially like certain parts of town. You know what I mean? Like dating in like Prescott or dating up north, like I feel like is a little more that would work on them in the way that I don't want it. In the way that you don't want it to. But I feel like the younger I feel like the in people in their like 20s and 30s aren't as traditional in that sense here.

SPEAKER_02 30:33

I feel like I have a weird like vibe because I am a raver. I love to go to raves, I love to go out to festivals and stuff like that, but I'm also Christian, so like I feel like it is a strange line because you'll have like the Christian like people with their pitchforks and stuff outside of the rave, and I'm in like assess chaps. Like and I'm like, you guys are not getting it, like, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 30:55

I'm also a really good person.

SPEAKER_02 30:56

I like I have it tattooed on my skin, but you know, tattoos are bad for you too. So I'm always like, I'm I'm in a weird like tiptoe in between like the newer generation

What Counts As Cheating

SPEAKER_02 31:05

of religion, in a sense.

SPEAKER_00 31:07

So one of the most Googled questions when it comes to relationships is what qualifies as cheating? What do you guys think qualifies as cheating? I know you're not into micro cheating, you're like, eh, that's not cheating.

SPEAKER_02 31:19

I think anything that you think would make me uncomfortable to hear is cheating. So, like, if I'm with a partner, like I feel like they should know me and know what I would feel weird about. And if you feel like you need to hide something, that's cheating. Like if you're going out for lunch with a friend and this is your friend since kindergarten and I know her, like okay. But if a coworker is like, let's grab lunch and you're like, I don't know if my girlfriend would like this, you know, if anything makes you hesitate, I feel like that's cheating. I don't have like a very like I could go into details like you know, emotional cheating, physical cheating, micro cheating. Um, but I feel like that puts like a a box, you know. So it's like, well, I didn't do that, so I wasn't cheating. It's like, no, but you knew it would make me feel bad. Right?

SPEAKER_00 32:08

So if you do research, it says in romantic relationships, cheating generally involves breaking the agreed upon boundaries of trust. Physical infidelity ranges from kissing to explicit sexual acts outside of the partnership, emotional infidelity, forming intense emotional attachments, seeking romantic validation, or having secret deep conversations with someone else. And then you have digital infidelity, engaging in explicit texting, flirting online, or using dating apps without a partner's consent. So I think you're right, whatever you don't feel comfortable with.

SPEAKER_04 32:38

Right. I think people are just so they're in general, people are not good at like enforcing their boundaries. And so if you're not comfortable with saying, hey, that was disrespectful, and I'm not gonna tolerate being disrespected, we're done.

SPEAKER_01 32:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 33:00

A lot of people don't, they're they're not strong in their boundaries like that. And so they're like, that was cheating, it's over. But they can but they can break up with you if they call it cheating. Yeah. So it's like if they call it disrespect, yeah, they can't like come to terms with that it was like a breakupable offense. But if they call it cheating in their head, then it's different. Then it's different. Yeah. And so for me personally, if I feel disrespected, like I'm just done. Yeah. And so it to me, I don't think going to lunch with a coworker is cheating, but it's disrespectful. Yeah. And I will be done with you for that. I don't, and I, but I would never tell people that you cheated on me. I would just say that you were disrespectful and you didn't respect the boundaries of our relationship. Right.

SPEAKER_02 33:45

You think going to lunch with a coworker is like a female, if if you don't tell me about it, if it's hidden, I think, yeah. I think if if you tell me, like, hey, me and Abby are going to get lunch, whatever. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 33:58

I think if you're having if you're having a relationship with a coworker of an opposite sex and you're not disclosing it to your partner, I think that's disrespectful.

SPEAKER_02 34:09

You know what I also hate is the work wife, work husband thing. That is like so disrespectful because I I we can go back to the hospital. I see that all the time. People will be like, oh, that's my work wife, or oh, that's my work husband. And it's like, you really say that? Would you say that while your wife is standing right here? Would you call that girl your work wife while your actual wife is right here? Because I don't think you would. And I just I feel like that is just crosses the line for me.

The 65,000 Text Stalker Story

SPEAKER_04 34:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:36

So you had mentioned, but we didn't go into it, that woman that sent 65,000 texts to this guy that they went on one day, and he did not want anything to do with her, but she would not let it go. So I saw a breakdown, and it's pretty crazy. Jackie, 30-year-old in Florida, met a rich guy, Isaac, on the app Bluxi, which is for millionaires. Isaac is a CEO who lives in Arizona. They speak on the app, she travels from Florida to AZ, they bang, she believes she's in love and he's her soulmate. He does not feel the same. After the first date, he lets her know he isn't interested and she disagrees. He keeps telling her to stop texting. She says she loves him, they're meant to be together, they're soulmates. He goes to block her, but before he did, she straight up said, and I quote, if you block me, I'll move to Arizona to be closer to you. Months of these texts go by and he sees her in a car outside his house. Police show up. Then Jackie's texts turn dark. She says, and I quote, don't ever try to leave me. I'll kill you. I'll wear your face and the top of your skull and your hands and feet, and you'll be watching me in a taxidermy suit. I'd make sushi out of your kidneys and chopsticks out of your hand bones. Oh, what I would do with your blood. I would bathe in it. She literally texts this to him. So then the texts are one sided. Uh, she's now texting 500 texts a day. He would say, Leave me alone, but she thought he was just testing her loyalty. So that made her text even more. Finally, he blocks her. She shows up to his house again. So he left the country. When he's out of the country, he sees on his security cameras that Jackie's inside her house with her two dogs, food, wine, making herself at home. He calls the police and they find her in a bath. You remember this part, right? So she's just chilling in the bath. She starts rambling on about how E equals MC squared and how Isaac is the light, and she gives them the scientific equation for eternal love. They find butcher knives in her car, so they arrest her. She's released. At this point, she sent him 65,000 texts. A month after her arrest, she shows up to his business and says she's his wife. She calls the scene, so the police are called again. She's arrested. She truly believes this is all a test he's putting her through to test her loyalty and love for him and that they're gonna end up together. She's in jail and she calls for a press conference with the media outlets. They ask her about the 65,000 text messages, and she says, Well, love is an excessive thing. They confront her about the dark messages, and she says, When you're finding love, not everything is perfect. They ask, Are you crazy? She says, No, I'm the person who discovered love, the equation to light. Prosecutors offered her a plea deal that will would get her out of jail right away, but she refuses because the plea deal states she would not be able to contact him. She's like, No. She said, I want to go to trial because they'll find me innocent and they'll demand we get married. She was evaluated and found incompetent. Surprise, surprise. The charges were dropped and she was sent to a mental home.

SPEAKER_02 37:31

Wow, isn't that crazy? Dramatized.

A Date Turns Dangerous Fast

SPEAKER_02 37:35

I have a crazy story. So he needs to get a restraining order, um, which I have experience with. So believe it or not, I also dated another crazy guy that I had met on Hinge back before I was banned. And we went on a few dates. We were together for like two weeks. And we went out to a bar, we went to dinner and then to a bar, and his phone was blowing up the whole time. And I was like, Do you need to take that? Like, you can take that call. And he's like, No, no, no, no, no. It's nothing. So he went to the bathroom and left his phone at the bar. Um, I answered one of the calls because I'm nosy, like, I'm sorry, I'm just gonna whatever. So I answered the phone and it's this girl, she's like, Who is this? And I'm like, I'm Abby, I'm like on a date with him right now. And she was like, He's my boyfriend of like six months. And I was like, shut up. Like we've been seeing each other for like two weeks. And I was like, I'm gonna text you from my number. So I like hurry up, and like, I end the phone call text her from my number, and I was like, This is crazy. Um, so he comes back from the bathroom, I was like, I think the date's done, I just don't feel really good. I want to go home. And my car was at his house, so he drove us to the uh restaurant, and so we're driving home and I'm texting this girl, and I'm like, this is insane. Like, I'm so sorry, I had no idea he was in a relationship, and she was like still blowing up his phone. Well, she ended up texting him, I know you're on a date with Abby right now. I was like, Why would you dwell at my spot like that? Yeah, because that puts you in a that puts you in a potentially unsafe situation. It put me in a very unsafe situation. He ended up going insane. He's like, How did you talk to her? Yada yada. And he pulls a gun out and I sent her console, and he's like, You need to tell me what happened, like start shooting it out the window, going crazy. So I ended up like calling the cops or whatever, and I got a restraining order the next day. Um, and he was a firefighter. So I was like, I felt like you know, a trusted person um of the community. Oh my god, that's it. Why would she do that to throw you on the road?

SPEAKER_04 39:46

Why they say don't screenshot and send on those are we dating the same guy pages? Because when the guys find out that the girls are talking behind their backs about him, it makes them do crazy shit. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 40:00

Yeah. And it was nuts because my um, so I worked in the hospital at the time and I had to tell the hospital I have a restraining order against this guy because he threatened to show up to my work. Jeez. And I was like, if he shows up, like I have a restraining order. So the hospital police did a background check on him. Apparently, I was not the first girl to take one of these orders out on him. Like six other girls had restraining orders on him. Oh my god, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_00 40:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 40:23

And so when we went to court, I didn't get a lawyer because I was like, I feel like this is just a slander dog, you know. And I was bringing up the fact that this is a pattern for him, other girls have taken these out. And the judge was like, Well, you can't say that without proof, you know. So just retract that. And I was like, okay. And then it came time for me to question him, and I was like, Have you ever had a girl take this out on you before? And he said no. And the judge was like, You realize I can look this up. And the judge was like, Okay, go back. And then her little clerk came back with a stack of papers like this big on all the information. And she was like, come back up, and she was like, Yeah, I'm granting you this right now.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

Oh my god, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 41:06

Yeah, and I never heard from him again. Thank God it worked.

SPEAKER_00 41:08

Yeah, you know, but

The Crash Documentary Reactions

SPEAKER_00 41:10

it's crazy out there. It is crazy. Speaking of crazy, now it's time for the celebrity cut where we marinate in the juices of the celebrities. Did you guys watch the documentary The Crash?

SPEAKER_04 41:18

I haven't. No, I haven't yet. I've just seen the commercial or the previous movie. It's freaking crazy.

SPEAKER_00 41:25

She is freaking like Yeah, I've seen clips. So you know the premise, right? She's with her boyfriend and a friend, and she just turns this corner and drives a hundred miles an hour straight into a wall. They die, she survives. And at first they think it's an accident, but then they start researching, and she's volatile, they have a toxic relationship. She's threatened to kill him in the past before. I saw she like pre-drove the route. She drove that route prior. And like people are saying that um, you know, there's nothing down that way. It's just industrial. There's no reason for her to be driving down that way. But it what's crazy to me is that I mean, she's a bad seed. She and she was claiming it was pots, where you like black out. That's what her her defense was. And her mother, they asked her on the stand, like, so you knew she would black out if she had pots, but you still allowed her to drive. Yeah. You still gave her a license. Um, and yeah, she claims that she has no recollection. But what's crazy is her lawyer suggested that she have, I don't know what the name is, you know, you have a jury trial and then a trial where it's just the judge. And the judge looks at the information and decides. And I guess she was recommended by her lawyer just to do the judge trial, not the jury trial, which I think, I mean, she is guilty, guilty, guilty. But I do think if she had a jury trial, they would have maybe found without a reasonable doubt. Right. And it wouldn't have been unanimous. Yeah. Because after this documentary came out, a lot of um public defenders have come out with holes in the story, and like right before the crash, you the wheel was turned 180 degrees. She was trying to save them, but you don't know. Right. Was she trying to save them, or was one of the passengers trying to save herself? But there could be, no one knows what happened in that car. So like Casey Anthony got off. We all know she's guilty, but I think if she had a jury trial, there could have been one that one person that was like, without a reasonable doubt.

SPEAKER_02 43:14

Yeah. I don't know. And I saw the clip of her too, where she was talking to her lawyer, like after the interview, and she's like, Did that sound good?

SPEAKER_00 43:22

Yeah, like when she interviewed in prison, it was so scripted. Yeah. Her the way that she answered every single question, like when they say, What do you think it was? Well, looking at the medical evidence, it would point to it was very rehearsed. Well, did you see too the shirt that her dad was wearing?

SPEAKER_02 43:38

Boom. He had a shirt that said boom on it. Yeah, it was so inappropriate.

SPEAKER_00 43:42

So he's a teacher and he was suspended because of his behavior participating in the documentary. Because he wore that shirt, boom. How disrespectful to the two people that passed. How awful. And you know what you're doing. And there's all these selfies of her driving and smoking weed, and he was condoning it like, Oh, I'm fine with her smoking weed. I'd Prefer her to smoke weed than to drink and drive. And like he was totally okay in defending her smoking weed and driving. Neither is okay. Neither is okay. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 44:08

Like you shouldn't be excusing one because she's not doing the other.

SPEAKER_00 44:12

Yeah. And as a teacher, like for you to say this on a document, Netflix documentary. Come on. What the bloody hell were you thinking? You know?

SPEAKER_04 44:22

That's crazy.

SPEAKER_00 44:23

But yeah, and then if you hear all these, have you heard the clips from her phone call conversations from jail? Yeah. Like it's freaking crazy. They were laughing. The mother calls and she's like, Oh my god, you're in the news on the Daily Mail. You made English news, you're worldwide news. And she's like, Oh my god, I'm famous, like laughing about it.

SPEAKER_02 44:39

She was telling like another inmate, like, oh, you should look up my story. Like, you can, when you're out, you can come to my trial. Like, you should come watch.

SPEAKER_00 44:46

And like on the phone call, she's like, Oh, maybe Kim Kay will reach out to me herself. And I guess Kim K like heard about the story. She's like, I'm passing. Other, like, um, other clips are like her talking about how pretty she is and how she's the only pretty one in jail. Like, I'm the only one in pretty and the only pretty one in jail here, like legit. Like, she's just so narcissistic. As if. And then it's just crazy. The mom and dad, they're getting a lot of flack for this. When the mom is like pleading for her daughter's case, she was like, Oh, you know, the other guy in the car, Dom, not Dom, Dom was her boyfriend. The other Cartavian, like, he we didn't really know him. He was just, he was a new friend. And the judge was like, So what? That means his life doesn't matter? Yeah. Like they're just like, You still kill Dom. Right? It doesn't matter. Now it's time for her to get to

Rapid Fire Red Flags And Goodbye

SPEAKER_00 45:35

know you as Zooyo, sponsored by Zoya, your neighborhood yogurt. Rapid fire questions. Okay. Are these red flags or no? Make sure you split the bill on the first date.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

Red flag.

SPEAKER_00 45:42

Still follows their ex on Instagram.

SPEAKER_02 45:44

Not a red flag.

SPEAKER_00 45:45

Bad tipper.

SPEAKER_02 45:46

Red flag.

SPEAKER_00 45:47

Has no social media.

SPEAKER_02 45:48

Oh green flag, love it.

SPEAKER_00 45:51

Where should someone not take you on a first date?

SPEAKER_02 45:53

Um to meet their parents.

SPEAKER_00 45:55

Is watching porn considered cheating? Yes. Before you're intimate, is it appropriate to ask your date how many people they've been with? No. Is it acceptable to have a have sex on a first date? Yes. Do you have any secret talents or anything that people might not know about you?

SPEAKER_02 46:11

With three? I can do just the regular three. Oh wow.

SPEAKER_00 46:14

That's pretty cool. In one sentence, why should someone date you?

SPEAKER_02 46:18

One sentence. I have a lot to give. I guess that's one sentence.

SPEAKER_00 46:26

And last but not least, what is your favorite sexual position or my?

SPEAKER_02 46:30

Ooh. I'm boring. I love a lovey dovey missionary. I'm such a lover girl. You're bipolar. Can you believe that?

SPEAKER_05 46:41

Right? It's like crazy like sex thing. I'm like, no, I just want to like look into your eyes.

SPEAKER_01 46:47

Like in a dungeon, sex dungeon.

SPEAKER_00 46:49

50 shaves are like, wait a second. That's hilarious. Thank you so much for joining us this week at the Meat Market. And thank you so much, Abby. If you want to snag a date with Abby, go to any of our social media platforms at Meat Market Podcast. And thank you to our sponsor, Tactical Tax Strategies. If you want to preserve your wealth and keep more of your own money in your wallet, you need to go to Tactical Tax Strategies. We'll see you next week at the Meat Market. Oh my God, I just totally got catfished.

SPEAKER_03 47:14

He looks absolutely nothing like his picture. So I found out the guy that I've been dating is married with kids. His wife just reached out to me.