Dating a Porn Star Isn’t What You Think, Here’s Why 😏

WEBVTT

00:00:00.959 --> 00:00:03.919
Oh my god, I just totally got catfished.

00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.080
He looks absolutely nothing like his picture.

00:00:06.320 --> 00:00:11.039
So I found out the guy that I've been dating is married with kids.

00:00:11.279 --> 00:00:13.759
His wife just reached out to me.

00:00:15.119 --> 00:00:16.239
Welcome to the meat market.

00:00:16.480 --> 00:00:19.359
The single scene is a slaughterhouse, and we are here to devour it.

00:00:19.440 --> 00:00:20.079
We are your hosts.

00:00:20.160 --> 00:00:20.719
I'm Lindsay.

00:00:20.800 --> 00:00:21.199
I'm Jess.

00:00:21.359 --> 00:00:23.280
And today's sizzling single is Melissa.

00:00:23.359 --> 00:00:23.679
Welcome.

00:00:23.920 --> 00:00:24.800
Hey guys, how are you?

00:00:25.039 --> 00:00:29.039
So you have a lot of followers and a lot of spicy content.

00:00:29.199 --> 00:00:30.320
Do you get any inappropriate?

00:00:30.559 --> 00:00:32.640
I bet your DMs are just crazy.

00:00:32.880 --> 00:00:37.119
I've actually started posting about that a little bit anecdotally because my DMs are insane.

00:00:37.280 --> 00:00:40.960
And I normally just, I mean, it comes with the territory, so I just let it roll.

00:00:41.039 --> 00:00:42.880
Like I read it, I think it's funny, I move on.

00:00:43.039 --> 00:00:46.399
But sometimes I just get fed up and I'm like, you guys are stupid.

00:00:46.560 --> 00:00:48.240
Like, please stop sending me this.

00:00:48.320 --> 00:00:54.719
Like, I don't know where people get like the confidence to just say insane things online.

00:00:54.880 --> 00:00:56.320
I mean, obviously it's anonymity.

00:00:56.719 --> 00:00:58.240
The audacity is wild.

00:00:58.320 --> 00:00:59.920
But does that ever work for them?

00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:00.799
Like, what do they think?

00:01:00.960 --> 00:01:01.359
Never know.

00:01:01.759 --> 00:01:01.920
No.

00:01:02.079 --> 00:01:04.079
So do you read every single message?

00:01:04.319 --> 00:01:05.280
Unfortunately, I do.

00:01:05.519 --> 00:01:06.879
Well, I mean, as many as I can.

00:01:06.959 --> 00:01:10.560
There is like when you get to a certain amount of followers, you have a bunch of different folders.

00:01:10.719 --> 00:01:13.840
And so there's like a folder within a folder that I just don't even go in there.

00:01:13.920 --> 00:01:20.879
You know, it's got words I've blocked, and you know, people that don't have like questionable accounts and whatever, it's kind of over there.

00:01:21.040 --> 00:01:23.439
But the ones that are in like my main folders, I read all of them.

00:01:23.599 --> 00:01:27.439
Whether or not I respond is one thing, but I'm nosy and I want to know.

00:01:27.680 --> 00:01:29.519
And you don't you don't want to miss anything good, you know?

00:01:29.760 --> 00:01:34.560
No, and it's funny, sometimes like important people will end up in those folders too.

00:01:34.640 --> 00:01:38.079
So I think I'm always afraid that I'm gonna miss an opportunity or something if I don't check them.

00:01:38.319 --> 00:01:44.000
Yeah, off the top of your head, do you remember any just like wild or crazy DMs?

00:01:44.319 --> 00:01:50.000
Yesterday I got one that was like, I think this is wild because it's so just asinine.

00:01:50.079 --> 00:01:54.400
But it was a guy with uh no followers, no profile pick, nothing.

00:01:54.560 --> 00:02:00.480
And he was like, Hey, I want to get into the industry, I want to start making content, and I would like to make a video with you.

00:02:00.640 --> 00:02:03.439
So if you could contact me so we can make that happen.

00:02:03.599 --> 00:02:10.960
I get probably 50 of those a day, but it was the way he had worded it, it was just like, no, yeah, you're like$10,000, sure.

00:02:11.120 --> 00:02:12.719
Yeah, so I no, not even that.

00:02:12.800 --> 00:02:14.240
It doesn't benefit me at all.

00:02:14.400 --> 00:02:14.960
You know what I mean?

00:02:15.120 --> 00:02:16.080
It's it's a pain in the ass.

00:02:16.159 --> 00:02:20.879
Like the thought of like helping somebody accomplish no, it's just no.

00:02:23.120 --> 00:02:23.520
Obviously.

00:02:24.080 --> 00:02:25.360
Oh my oh god.

00:02:25.520 --> 00:02:26.879
Okay, I'm so innocent.

00:02:26.960 --> 00:02:27.360
Like, he's a good one.

00:02:27.520 --> 00:02:28.159
Oh, so innocent.

00:02:29.120 --> 00:02:31.039
Yeah, it's like he wants to do one of the TikTok dances.

00:02:31.280 --> 00:02:31.840
He wants to dance.

00:02:32.800 --> 00:02:35.039
No, and see that I would be like, that's funny.

00:02:35.120 --> 00:02:35.520
Okay, fine.

00:02:35.599 --> 00:02:38.560
Like we could do a little like skit or whatever, but I'm like, no, dude.

00:02:38.639 --> 00:02:44.159
Like, so I actually responded to that one because I thought it was so out of pocket and I was just fed up that day.

00:02:44.319 --> 00:02:47.680
And I was like, this is like asking LeBron to play basketball with you.

00:02:47.919 --> 00:02:49.680
Like, this is what I do for a living.

00:02:49.759 --> 00:02:50.800
I'm very successful at it.

00:02:50.960 --> 00:02:53.840
Why would I want to work with you?

00:02:54.080 --> 00:02:55.599
Like it's just weird, you know.

00:02:55.680 --> 00:02:57.840
Like, why would LeBron want to like shoot some hoops with you?

00:02:58.000 --> 00:02:59.759
It's just not, it's not fun for him.

00:03:00.080 --> 00:03:02.879
That's hilarious that he actually thought you would say yes.

00:03:02.960 --> 00:03:04.400
But I guess you miss all the shots you don't take.

00:03:04.479 --> 00:03:08.080
So everybody responded, they're like, you can't fault him for asking.

00:03:08.159 --> 00:03:09.199
I was like, I can.

00:03:09.439 --> 00:03:11.120
Like, that's so stupid.

00:03:11.360 --> 00:03:14.000
It's like kind of rude, like, ah, but whatever.

00:03:14.159 --> 00:03:14.479
That's funny.

00:03:14.639 --> 00:03:15.039
It's funny.

00:03:16.080 --> 00:03:21.280
I was gonna say, do you ever have people DMing you to like date you, or is it mostly content?

00:03:21.599 --> 00:03:23.439
I I mean, it's everything.

00:03:23.599 --> 00:03:25.360
I get everything across the board.

00:03:25.520 --> 00:03:29.439
The the people asking to date me are actually very sweet.

00:03:29.759 --> 00:03:30.319
You know what I mean?

00:03:30.400 --> 00:03:31.759
I think those are like real guys.

00:03:31.840 --> 00:03:34.159
They see something that we have in common.

00:03:34.319 --> 00:03:41.840
I post a lot about sports and I like to go to dive bars, and I think people like see that commonality and they're like, I could hang out with her.

00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:42.639
And I like that.

00:03:42.719 --> 00:03:43.599
I like those messages.

00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:48.159
It makes it actually makes me feel good that you know, people find those parts of me attractive as well.

00:03:48.479 --> 00:03:51.919
A beautiful girl that likes sports and that likes to go to dive bars?

00:03:52.240 --> 00:03:55.599
Great! I bet you get a lot of comments about that.

00:03:55.680 --> 00:04:00.159
So, has anyone ever slid into your DMs where you actually were interested in them?

00:04:00.400 --> 00:04:00.639
Yeah.

00:04:00.879 --> 00:04:01.120
Really?

00:04:01.280 --> 00:04:03.439
Have you ever dated a follower or a fan?

00:04:03.680 --> 00:04:04.879
Yeah, yeah, I have.

00:04:04.960 --> 00:04:10.159
And I I'm hesitant when I say that because that that makes some of these more outlandish people think that they have a chance.

00:04:10.560 --> 00:04:12.400
So I'm like, cool your jets, you guys.

00:04:12.479 --> 00:04:13.599
It's it's very rare.

00:04:13.680 --> 00:04:15.919
It's very rare, and it has to line up perfectly.

00:04:16.079 --> 00:04:19.680
And the one time that I did it was a guy that lived in Scottsdale, right?

00:04:19.759 --> 00:04:21.600
Like, I'm not gonna fly out to meet you.

00:04:21.759 --> 00:04:24.160
I'm not gonna see you in LA when I'm working.

00:04:24.240 --> 00:04:25.120
Like, I'm not gonna do that.

00:04:25.199 --> 00:04:30.639
It's like you have it has to be very easy for us to get together because relationships are hard, like right off.

00:04:32.720 --> 00:04:33.920
Unfortunately, yeah, yeah.

00:04:34.160 --> 00:04:35.120
And why didn't that work?

00:04:35.199 --> 00:04:36.160
Did you date long term?

00:04:36.399 --> 00:04:38.000
No, we just went on a couple dates.

00:04:38.160 --> 00:04:40.000
Um, I don't think I was like ready.

00:04:40.079 --> 00:04:42.720
I was kind of rebounding a little bit.

00:04:43.120 --> 00:04:46.639
And um yeah, I don't know.

00:04:46.800 --> 00:04:47.920
It's tough.

00:04:48.480 --> 00:04:49.920
People underestimate the power of timing.

00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:54.560
If one person's not ready, even if you're, you know, yeah on paper, a great match.

00:04:54.639 --> 00:04:56.480
If the timing's not right, I feel like it won't work.

00:04:56.720 --> 00:04:57.199
Yeah, that.

00:04:57.279 --> 00:05:01.839
And I think like I'm I'm a lot older, not a lot, but I'm a little older than I look.

00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:06.560
And so I think I'm attracting like a younger crowd lately, and we just don't have that much in common.

00:05:06.800 --> 00:05:07.279
How old are you?

00:05:07.519 --> 00:05:07.920
36.

00:05:08.079 --> 00:05:09.680
Oh my god, you're like you're 21.

00:05:09.759 --> 00:05:09.920
Wow.

00:05:10.319 --> 00:05:10.720
Thank you.

00:05:11.040 --> 00:05:12.079
Oh my god, that's so nice.

00:05:12.399 --> 00:05:12.639
Wow.

00:05:12.879 --> 00:05:14.319
Botox is amazing.

00:05:15.120 --> 00:05:15.519
Yes.

00:05:15.680 --> 00:05:21.360
And so I don't know, I take really good care of myself, but I have like I've gone through my wild phase.

00:05:21.519 --> 00:05:23.360
I've I've traveled a ton.

00:05:23.519 --> 00:05:24.480
I want to be home.

00:05:24.639 --> 00:05:25.839
I want to live a quiet life.

00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:28.800
I want so I'm looking for people that also kind of want that.

00:05:28.879 --> 00:05:36.079
And I feel like, you know, when I was 26 and 28, and these guys that are reaching out to me, I was doing a lot.

00:05:36.160 --> 00:05:37.920
And I don't really want to do that anymore.

00:05:38.079 --> 00:05:41.120
So there's just kind of that disconnect as well.

00:05:41.439 --> 00:05:43.120
Are you looking to get married and have kids?

00:05:43.199 --> 00:05:44.079
What are you looking for?

00:05:44.319 --> 00:05:44.959
Yeah, for sure.

00:05:45.120 --> 00:05:51.439
I mean, it's not something that I'm like dying for, but am I open to it?

00:05:51.600 --> 00:05:52.240
Yeah.

00:05:52.480 --> 00:06:00.639
Um, I am a bit of a feminist, so I I just don't think marriage in the traditional sense benefits women anymore in this day and age.

00:06:00.800 --> 00:06:03.199
So it's, you know, I like the symbolism of it.

00:06:03.279 --> 00:06:06.879
I think it's really sweet and romantic, but it's not a have to.

00:06:07.120 --> 00:06:09.680
Would you be open to being a stay-at-home mom, like a trad wife?

00:06:09.839 --> 00:06:10.240
Uh no.

00:06:10.639 --> 00:06:11.040
No, I don't know.

00:06:11.759 --> 00:06:15.680
Well, I think I love to work and I love to be busy.

00:06:15.759 --> 00:06:20.720
And yes, uh being a mom is both of those things in a different sense.

00:06:20.959 --> 00:06:24.800
But I think uh being a stay-at-home would be hard on me.

00:06:25.120 --> 00:06:27.920
Would you still do content, the same type of content?

00:06:28.800 --> 00:06:31.439
Or would you be willing to give it up a little bit?

00:06:32.720 --> 00:06:46.160
I don't know, and that's probably why I haven't like formed full thoughts around this topic, because I love what I do, and I I'm not looking for anyone to save me or take me away from it.

00:06:46.399 --> 00:06:52.720
But when you talk about children, there's a level of appropriateness that is vital.

00:06:53.279 --> 00:06:56.560
And you know, I just don't know how I would navigate that.

00:06:56.720 --> 00:06:58.800
And if I don't know, then the answer is no.

00:06:58.959 --> 00:06:59.120
Yeah.

00:06:59.279 --> 00:07:02.000
You know, so you consider yourself a content creator, right?

00:07:02.240 --> 00:07:02.959
Or like an influencer.

00:07:03.199 --> 00:07:04.480
How do you how do you make money?

00:07:04.639 --> 00:07:05.600
You promote products?

00:07:05.680 --> 00:07:06.399
How does that work?

00:07:06.639 --> 00:07:15.439
No, I actually consider myself a porn star because I do studio porn, which sets me apart from a lot of just the OnlyFans girls and the social media content creators.

00:07:15.600 --> 00:07:17.360
I do all of those things as well.

00:07:17.519 --> 00:07:23.199
But because you can't market that, social media is my biggest uh platform.

00:07:23.439 --> 00:07:28.079
So studio porn is that so that's like porn, like in a studio sitting with camera people, that kind of stuff.

00:07:28.560 --> 00:07:34.240
The old school, like uh, you know, major companies that hire talent to perform.

00:07:34.639 --> 00:07:35.600
Got yeah, okay.

00:07:35.759 --> 00:07:38.959
Because I know that there are so many, so you don't do OnlyFans, because I know I do.

00:07:39.279 --> 00:07:40.319
Oh, you do OnlyFans as well.

00:07:40.480 --> 00:07:41.040
Okay, gotcha.

00:07:41.519 --> 00:07:48.800
But there's girls that just do OnlyFans that consider themselves content creators, but there's kind of this like, you know, what makes a porn star?

00:07:48.959 --> 00:07:53.759
And I think we've as an industry we've landed on whether or not you regularly do studio porn.

00:07:54.000 --> 00:07:54.560
Got yeah.

00:07:55.040 --> 00:07:59.040
And now, have you ever dated a subscriber or a f no?

00:07:59.680 --> 00:08:06.319
No, I think that crosses a line a little bit because I appreciate being a fantasy for a lot of people.

00:08:06.720 --> 00:08:12.480
So if I have to pull back the curtain and show you all of me that's not a fantasy, it makes me uncomfortable.

00:08:12.879 --> 00:08:17.040
Because you've already, if you're a fan, you've already built me up in your head to be one thing.

00:08:17.279 --> 00:08:20.399
So I need I need people in my life close to me.

00:08:20.560 --> 00:08:25.839
I like to date people that aren't familiar with what I do, or maybe like, oh yeah, I saw you in this one thing.

00:08:25.920 --> 00:08:28.800
But if they're a full-on fan, it's uncomfortable for me.

00:08:29.040 --> 00:08:30.240
I can imagine that would be awkward.

00:08:30.639 --> 00:08:33.440
Have you had anybody recognize you in public before?

00:08:33.759 --> 00:08:33.919
Yeah.

00:08:34.080 --> 00:08:34.320
Yeah.

00:08:34.399 --> 00:08:34.559
Yeah.

00:08:34.799 --> 00:08:35.039
A lot.

00:08:35.120 --> 00:08:37.919
I I get a lot of um like double take.

00:08:38.000 --> 00:08:40.639
Like they look and then they're like, wait, I know this girl.

00:08:40.879 --> 00:08:42.240
And they're too shy to say something.

00:08:42.559 --> 00:08:42.960
That's fine.

00:08:43.200 --> 00:08:45.679
But then they're like looking at their phone, and then I'm like, oh, there it is.

00:08:45.759 --> 00:08:47.360
I I want to be like, just come say hi.

00:08:47.440 --> 00:08:48.639
I'll tell you where you know me from.

00:08:48.879 --> 00:08:49.039
Yeah.

00:08:49.600 --> 00:08:51.039
In an appropriate setting, right?

00:08:51.279 --> 00:08:57.679
So has anyone on OnlyFans requested you do something crazy that like you are not comfortable with or Yeah, all the time.

00:08:58.080 --> 00:08:58.399
All the time.

00:08:58.639 --> 00:09:08.159
I think, especially when I started, I didn't realize uh some of the tricks people use to get you to perform their kinks in a way without like asking for it, you know.

00:09:08.399 --> 00:09:10.399
So uh crazy stuff.

00:09:10.559 --> 00:09:17.919
There was a guy that really liked shoes, which is a pretty normal kink, I mean, compared to what I'm used to.

00:09:18.240 --> 00:09:21.279
But he only liked his daughter-in-law's shoes.

00:09:21.600 --> 00:09:24.159
So he wanted me to pretend to be her.

00:09:24.480 --> 00:09:26.320
No, that is creepy.

00:09:26.720 --> 00:09:27.840
That's why I thought too.

00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:29.200
I was like, okay.

00:09:29.519 --> 00:09:30.480
Oh my goodness.

00:09:30.720 --> 00:09:32.240
Yeah, to each their own.

00:09:32.559 --> 00:09:34.559
So how does so you're on a date?

00:09:34.639 --> 00:09:37.279
Do you tell guys when you date them up front what you do?

00:09:37.600 --> 00:09:47.679
Yeah, that um, you know, waiting has not worked out for me in the past, you know, to because that's something you when you get to know someone, a huge part of my life is what I do.

00:09:47.759 --> 00:09:49.440
It's a massive part of my life.

00:09:49.759 --> 00:09:55.519
And it also comes with a a really big stigma and there's kind of consent involved.

00:09:55.679 --> 00:09:59.039
So I don't want to involve anybody in my life that doesn't want to be there.

00:09:59.120 --> 00:10:01.759
And that's gone really bad for me famously in the past.

00:10:01.919 --> 00:10:08.320
So I'm just like, you kind of have to know right off the bat, but I don't engage with people that I don't feel comfortable talking about that with.

00:10:08.399 --> 00:10:14.159
If it if I'm at a bar and I know like this conversation isn't going anywhere, I'll lie my pants off all day long.

00:10:14.480 --> 00:10:18.000
Like, oh, I just do social media marketing, something I say all the time.

00:10:18.080 --> 00:10:19.440
That's what I got my degree in.

00:10:19.759 --> 00:10:27.919
But when it comes to saying that I'm an adult performer, if we're serious, then I have to tell you right away.

00:10:28.399 --> 00:10:30.159
How do most people men react?

00:10:32.399 --> 00:10:42.480
It's I think because I'm so careful about reading who will be okay with it and who won't, it usually goes okay for me or good.

00:10:42.639 --> 00:10:45.759
You know, it's it never goes bad, like, oh, that's gross or whatever.

00:10:46.000 --> 00:10:49.360
Because we've I've already kind of sussed out maybe that reaction.

00:10:49.600 --> 00:10:52.240
But I think some guys are just intrigued.

00:10:52.320 --> 00:10:58.000
They're interested, not in the sexual aspect, but in the aspect of like, well, how's that gonna work with us?

00:10:58.240 --> 00:11:01.279
You know, I bet they have to be super secure, right?

00:11:01.679 --> 00:11:02.240
I think so.

00:11:02.399 --> 00:11:07.759
Yeah, super secure, but also like it's in my nature to make my partner feel secure.

00:11:08.240 --> 00:11:14.559
So just like any job where you're using your body, you know, I think the military is actually kind of a good example.

00:11:14.720 --> 00:11:19.120
Like you go to work, you do your job, and then you come home and you're with your partner.

00:11:19.279 --> 00:11:24.559
And so, I mean, I've been doing it for so long that it's very easy for me to compartmentalize.

00:11:24.720 --> 00:11:30.320
So I need a partner that also understands that compartmentalization, but also wants me to have fun at work.

00:11:30.559 --> 00:11:34.559
You know, if you if you don't want the best for me, then how's that gonna work out?

00:11:34.879 --> 00:11:36.799
How did um how did you get into this?

00:11:36.960 --> 00:11:38.159
How did how did that?

00:11:38.720 --> 00:11:45.039
So COVID was a big catalyst for everybody, not everybody, but a lot of uh women camming at home.

00:11:45.200 --> 00:11:47.600
And so that's what I started doing for like a year.

00:11:47.759 --> 00:11:52.159
Um, then there was an expo, because I lived near Chicago at the time um when I started camming.

00:11:52.399 --> 00:11:58.159
There was an expo uh for the adult industry, and all my fans were like, you have to go so we can meet you, whatever.

00:11:58.240 --> 00:12:00.480
And I was like, Oh, I'm kind of shy, I don't think I could do that.

00:12:00.639 --> 00:12:02.480
And then I realized that's a great opportunity.

00:12:02.639 --> 00:12:06.639
So I went and then I started going to a couple other expos, went to one in LA.

00:12:06.799 --> 00:12:12.559
Um, the company I was camming for had like hired me to go there because it's my career took off really fast right away.

00:12:12.879 --> 00:12:20.799
And um, when I was there, I got approached by the biggest company in the adult industry and we're like, you would do great if you ever want to shoot a scene.

00:12:20.960 --> 00:12:23.759
And I remember I was like, ew, gross.

00:12:23.919 --> 00:12:25.440
Like, I don't, I don't do porn.

00:12:25.519 --> 00:12:26.720
Like that's ridiculous.

00:12:26.960 --> 00:12:30.879
And then I realized I was already doing porn just in the comfort of my own home.

00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:35.679
Because when you were camming, were you doing it just solo or were you having people come in just solo?

00:12:35.919 --> 00:12:36.159
Just solo.

00:12:36.399 --> 00:12:36.799
Just solo.

00:12:36.879 --> 00:12:45.840
And I had just barely started my OnlyFans, and you know, I hadn't really been working with anybody, but I realized it I I'm not shy about sexuality, it doesn't like bother me.

00:12:45.919 --> 00:12:49.919
So I was like, it it wasn't so much that I was worried about having sex on camera.

00:12:50.000 --> 00:12:54.080
I was just worried about being in front of a camera and like, would I be good at it?

00:12:54.240 --> 00:12:55.039
Would I be good enough?

00:12:55.200 --> 00:12:56.559
Would this be entertaining?

00:12:56.799 --> 00:13:00.879
And in the meetings that I had with the company, they were like, We'll make sure you look good.

00:13:01.039 --> 00:13:03.919
You can design it the way you want, you can work with who you want to work with.

00:13:04.159 --> 00:13:07.919
And a few weeks later, I was in Miami shooting my first scene, and the rest is history.

00:13:08.159 --> 00:13:08.720
And you loved it.

00:13:08.799 --> 00:13:09.840
It was I did, yeah.

00:13:10.159 --> 00:13:10.720
It was really great.

00:13:11.039 --> 00:13:13.039
No, did they pick who you shoot with?

00:13:13.120 --> 00:13:16.159
Like, have you ever shot with someone and you're like, oh, I get bad vibes from the city?

00:13:16.320 --> 00:13:16.639
All the time.

00:13:16.960 --> 00:13:17.360
All the time.

00:13:17.600 --> 00:13:17.840
Yeah.

00:13:18.080 --> 00:13:18.559
All the time.

00:13:18.639 --> 00:13:20.240
I mean, I have a pretty long no list.

00:13:20.320 --> 00:13:22.559
Everyone in the industry has a no list or a yes list.

00:13:22.720 --> 00:13:28.639
And you, you, I mean, I have an agent, a lot of people have an agent, so your agent works off of those lists, right?

00:13:28.799 --> 00:13:32.960
And to be fair, the talent pool is actually pretty small when you get to a certain caliber.

00:13:33.120 --> 00:13:39.200
So I joke that my body count is not as high as you think it is because I'm working with the same people all year long, you know.

00:13:39.440 --> 00:13:40.320
So yeah.

00:13:40.639 --> 00:13:40.960
Nice.

00:13:41.120 --> 00:13:41.600
That's funny.

00:13:41.679 --> 00:13:44.720
I have so unrelated, but question.

00:13:44.799 --> 00:13:51.600
So I work in pediatrics, and that's sort of my thing is like I can't work with kids all day long and then come home to my own kids.

00:13:51.759 --> 00:13:57.679
That's like my number one reason why I've never felt a super like strong desire to have children.

00:13:57.840 --> 00:13:58.159
Yeah.

00:13:58.399 --> 00:14:02.480
How does that work when you're a porn star if you're doing sex all day?

00:14:02.720 --> 00:14:05.600
Like how do you come home and want to have sex with your partner?

00:14:06.000 --> 00:14:07.120
Does it affect your sex life?

00:14:07.200 --> 00:14:07.679
Your presentation.

00:14:07.919 --> 00:14:08.960
Yes, yes, it definitely does.

00:14:09.039 --> 00:14:18.960
And I think anyone would be lying if they say that it doesn't, because um, I shoot maybe once a week, maybe twice a week, and then I do content at home as well.

00:14:19.120 --> 00:14:22.480
So it's not as like I'm having sex with different people every day.

00:14:22.559 --> 00:14:24.000
I'm doing an orgy every day.

00:14:24.080 --> 00:14:28.879
It's not that, I mean, there's been a week or two where it's a lot of work in in one week.

00:14:28.960 --> 00:14:36.639
But the interesting things I feel like, you know, if you don't know much about the industry, we're tested every two weeks for a full blood, urine, and swab panel.

00:14:36.799 --> 00:14:41.600
So, and you're only working with people that have the exact same test from the exact same facility.

00:14:41.759 --> 00:14:45.360
So it's very um tight in that sense, number one.

00:14:45.600 --> 00:14:49.360
Number two, like I said, I I can pick and choose when I work.

00:14:49.519 --> 00:14:52.559
Um, so I like I said, I don't like to work every day.

00:14:52.720 --> 00:14:58.320
So, you know, but when it comes to having a partner, I am not a hypersexual person.

00:14:58.639 --> 00:15:03.039
So it's a little boring for me if all you want to do is have sex, right?

00:15:03.200 --> 00:15:05.279
Like if we're in the moment, let's do it.

00:15:05.440 --> 00:15:12.960
But there's also this thing like male performers don't like to have sex with their partner the night before they have a scene because then they might be tired and might not perform as well.

00:15:13.120 --> 00:15:16.639
That's just certain performers that have have told me that firsthand.

00:15:16.720 --> 00:15:24.080
But like the same, like I don't want you to hurt me or bruise me or like take it too far, and then I have to work the next day and be really uncomfortable.

00:15:24.320 --> 00:15:26.639
Cause porn sex is pretty uncomfortable.

00:15:26.799 --> 00:15:27.759
It's for show.

00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:30.080
So it's like that layered on top.

00:15:30.159 --> 00:15:33.679
And then when I get home, if I've had a rough scene, I I I need to recover.

00:15:33.759 --> 00:15:38.080
I don't want to, you know, like it's a it's a lot of logistics, I feel.

00:15:38.559 --> 00:15:41.519
We heard that that there's a lot of like acting that goes into porn.

00:15:41.600 --> 00:15:51.200
Like women don't actually orgasm the way they do in porn, or are there some things that like some shocking truths that about the industry that maybe we don't know?

00:15:51.440 --> 00:15:53.600
Yeah, I always say it's like WWE, right?

00:15:53.679 --> 00:15:54.480
Like it's real.

00:15:54.639 --> 00:15:59.759
Like I'm really having sex, but is it the same sex that I'm having when I'm at home?

00:16:00.080 --> 00:16:01.679
No, because that's boring.

00:16:01.919 --> 00:16:05.200
You know, like I'm I'm laying flat on my back for five minutes.

00:16:05.360 --> 00:16:07.200
Like you don't want a video of that.

00:16:07.600 --> 00:16:11.440
But um, no, there is there are a lot of aspects of porn that are very real.

00:16:11.600 --> 00:16:14.799
There's performers I love working with, and we have amazing sex.

00:16:14.960 --> 00:16:16.879
Yes, I'm orgasming, yes, it's real.

00:16:16.960 --> 00:16:23.840
Like, but there's still a camera there, and they're asking us to like open our bodies up so they can get a shot that they want.

00:16:23.919 --> 00:16:25.440
And you would never do that at home.

00:16:25.679 --> 00:16:28.879
Have you ever had a a coworker catch feelings with you or want to date with you?

00:16:29.120 --> 00:16:31.120
I was literally just gonna ask the same thing.

00:16:31.200 --> 00:16:32.720
Let's say definitely.

00:16:32.879 --> 00:16:39.600
And it's very awkward because depending on how it's handled, I'll just put you on my no list and I'll never see you again.

00:16:39.840 --> 00:16:40.159
Really?

00:16:40.320 --> 00:16:42.080
Yeah, because I don't have time for that.

00:16:42.480 --> 00:16:46.080
I I number one, I like the phrase I don't like to shit where I eat.

00:16:46.159 --> 00:16:49.919
And I feel like people that have relationships in this industry, it's very messy.

00:16:50.080 --> 00:16:51.039
There are a few exceptions.

00:16:51.200 --> 00:16:56.159
I have a few friends where both of them are performers, but they've been together for years, you know, like it works.

00:16:56.320 --> 00:16:59.279
Like everybody else, it's just drama, you know.

00:16:59.600 --> 00:17:03.039
Have you ever liked a guy that you worked with or wanted to take no?

00:17:03.840 --> 00:17:08.559
No, because I like I like quiet, normal people.

00:17:09.039 --> 00:17:13.119
And there are a few um a few male performers like that.

00:17:13.200 --> 00:17:16.160
But also when I walk into a room, I see that person as my coworker.

00:17:16.880 --> 00:17:18.640
So yeah, I don't know.

00:17:18.720 --> 00:17:23.279
Like I said, I'm really good at compartmentalization, so I don't think I have the ability to like cross that line.

00:17:23.839 --> 00:17:27.200
Have you ever dated a guy that's like, oh my god, a porn slash is gonna be crazy in bed?

00:17:27.440 --> 00:17:31.839
And then you get to the bedroom and he's like wanting to do these crazy escapades.

00:17:32.240 --> 00:17:34.079
Yeah, yeah, all the time.

00:17:34.160 --> 00:17:36.640
And unfortunately, like, I I want you to think I'm cool.

00:17:36.720 --> 00:17:38.319
I want you to think I'm good.

00:17:38.480 --> 00:17:40.319
So I'm like kind of playing along.

00:17:40.400 --> 00:17:51.920
But I just remember one time this guy was like, let's do like reverse cowgirl, the the kind I don't know if I should like act it out with my hands, but it was this position that is like we were just talking about reverse cowgirl.

00:17:52.319 --> 00:17:56.960
Yeah, but it's one where your feet are up, not down, yeah, and you're facing away from your partner.

00:17:57.119 --> 00:17:58.960
So it's just like not great.

00:17:59.200 --> 00:18:03.839
Like all I can see is your little toes, and I'm like doing my best, you know.

00:18:04.079 --> 00:18:09.119
But um, I was like, yay, this is great, and made him feel like I loved it.

00:18:09.200 --> 00:18:11.920
And then the next time we saw each other's like, you want to do that position again?

00:18:12.000 --> 00:18:12.799
I was like, no.

00:18:12.960 --> 00:18:16.400
He's like, Well, you liked it last time, and I was like, Oh, that's right.

00:18:16.559 --> 00:18:17.039
That's right.

00:18:17.200 --> 00:18:20.400
It did make you think that I liked that, and I did have fun.

00:18:20.720 --> 00:18:23.359
I mean, I I do things that I like, right?

00:18:23.440 --> 00:18:25.359
But I was like, that one didn't actually do it for me.

00:18:25.440 --> 00:18:30.319
I was doing that for your benefit, but my my rule is no reverse cowgirl on leg day.

00:18:30.480 --> 00:18:33.519
So maybe you can use that and just say it was leg day in the gym.

00:18:34.319 --> 00:18:35.759
I have a rule, yeah.

00:18:35.920 --> 00:18:36.480
No shit.

00:18:36.720 --> 00:18:39.519
Except for when they they're like holding, they're like, listen, I'll do all the work.

00:18:39.599 --> 00:18:44.240
So they like hold you up and you're like, no, no, this defeats the purpose.

00:18:44.559 --> 00:18:44.799
No.

00:18:45.039 --> 00:18:45.200
No.

00:18:45.440 --> 00:18:46.319
So I have a question.

00:18:46.480 --> 00:18:50.319
So you were raised Mormon with a Mormon family, yeah.

00:18:50.480 --> 00:18:53.279
And so how does your family take your career?

00:18:53.440 --> 00:18:55.359
Do they are they supportive about it?

00:18:55.680 --> 00:18:57.680
Well, uh, yes and no, right?

00:18:57.839 --> 00:19:01.039
I don't think they agree with it, but they really love me.

00:19:01.119 --> 00:19:02.400
We're a really close family.

00:19:02.480 --> 00:19:07.119
And if there's one thing you can say a lot of bad things about the Mormon religion, I definitely could.

00:19:07.279 --> 00:19:16.880
But the one thing I can say is that when you find the right people, they're very loving and very forgiving, and they understand that like that's not for me to cast judgment on someone.

00:19:17.039 --> 00:19:21.759
You know, it's just because your morals aren't the same doesn't mean that they don't have value.

00:19:22.240 --> 00:19:26.559
And that's I think that's pretty true for a lot of Mormons that I interact with.

00:19:26.720 --> 00:19:28.480
Like I said, it doesn't make them feel comfortable.

00:19:28.559 --> 00:19:33.359
I mean, I also drink, you know, like that doesn't make a Mormon feel comfortable to be around anyway.

00:19:33.599 --> 00:19:42.960
But um, my parents specifically were a little shocked, needed a minute to like process, and then they just think it's funny and they're very supportive, you know.

00:19:43.039 --> 00:19:48.720
They always uh I had to block my mom on Instagram because she kept asking, she's like, You look so pretty in that photo shoot.

00:19:48.799 --> 00:19:51.920
I'm like, mom, my tits are out.

00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:54.559
Can you not like stop looking at my thirst trap?

00:19:54.640 --> 00:19:56.079
So oh, that's hilarious.

00:19:56.960 --> 00:19:59.680
You know, it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and you're you do it the

00:20:00.240 --> 00:20:02.400
Smart way and you're wise about it.

00:20:02.640 --> 00:20:03.039
I try.

00:20:03.200 --> 00:20:03.599
I try.

00:20:03.680 --> 00:20:11.279
I think I definitely saw early on what a negative influence this industry can be, and I didn't want it to change me.

00:20:11.440 --> 00:20:19.279
So I just kind of like closed my circle, got closer to my family, was really picky about the work that I did and just really stayed true to myself.

00:20:19.359 --> 00:20:24.960
You know, there's a lot of fabrication in this industry, and I try to make it as real as possible.

00:20:25.119 --> 00:20:35.599
I show my real interests, I show, you know, because I feel like when you're dating and trying to attract people, I don't want to sit down with somebody and then be like, oh, you don't really like hockey, but you post about it all the time.

00:20:35.920 --> 00:20:37.119
I do really like hockey.

00:20:37.279 --> 00:20:38.400
That's why I post about it.

00:20:38.559 --> 00:20:39.200
So it's not.

00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:42.720
And now, why did you leave the Mormon church?

00:20:42.799 --> 00:20:44.319
You're not Mormon today, right?

00:20:44.720 --> 00:20:46.799
We don't have enough time to get into that conversation.

00:20:47.119 --> 00:20:47.920
That's a whole other episode.

00:20:48.400 --> 00:20:50.000
Yeah, that's a whole other handle.

00:20:50.079 --> 00:20:51.200
I need my therapist here.

00:20:51.359 --> 00:20:54.319
But moral of the story is like my values just didn't align with that.

00:20:54.400 --> 00:20:56.319
There's a lot of things I just don't agree with.

00:20:56.559 --> 00:21:00.559
I kind of was a teenager during the time when gay marriage was a big topic.

00:21:00.799 --> 00:21:02.480
Utah was lobbying against that.

00:21:02.640 --> 00:21:06.559
Like it was just very to it was kind of like a pick-aside time.

00:21:06.960 --> 00:21:08.000
And I was like, you know what?

00:21:08.079 --> 00:21:09.440
I don't, this isn't for me.

00:21:09.599 --> 00:21:10.240
This isn't for me.

00:21:10.480 --> 00:21:13.440
Were you pre- did you feel pressured to like date, get married, have kids?

00:21:13.680 --> 00:21:14.000
Oh, yeah.

00:21:14.319 --> 00:21:17.920
A lot of pressure because everyone my age, I mean, it's very common.

00:21:18.160 --> 00:21:21.119
You women only go to college to meet their husbands, right?

00:21:21.279 --> 00:21:25.839
And so you're married with a kid by the time you graduate, if you even graduate at all.

00:21:25.920 --> 00:21:28.799
That's like very common and normal where I'm from.

00:21:29.039 --> 00:21:31.599
So yeah, kind of dodge that bullet.

00:21:31.839 --> 00:21:32.079
Crazy.

00:21:32.240 --> 00:21:35.039
So is that a red flag for you if a man is Mormon?

00:21:35.279 --> 00:21:36.000
Is that a red flag?

00:21:36.160 --> 00:21:36.799
Yes, yes.

00:21:37.200 --> 00:21:44.559
I don't like to date Mormons or ex-Mormons because it if you're not careful, it becomes a massive part of your personality.

00:21:44.880 --> 00:21:47.039
And I'm like, what what else about you?

00:21:47.200 --> 00:21:52.480
You know, like this this time in your life that you know it is pretty formative, so I do understand.

00:21:52.559 --> 00:21:56.640
But I've spent a lot of time, you know, becoming my own person.

00:21:56.880 --> 00:21:59.440
And I like people that are like that as well.

00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:02.319
So what does it take for a man to land a woman like you?

00:22:02.960 --> 00:22:03.200
Yeah.

00:22:03.359 --> 00:22:04.799
Oh, it's tough.

00:22:04.960 --> 00:22:05.359
I don't know.

00:22:05.440 --> 00:22:11.839
I think I I struggle to answer that question because all of my exes are very different.

00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:17.599
But I guess the commonality is that they're smart, they're successful, they're funny, and they're obsessed with me.

00:22:18.079 --> 00:22:23.680
You know, it's it's kind of across the board of what they do and what they and I I've always dated older, you know.

00:22:23.759 --> 00:22:27.920
I mean, when I've dated younger, that that doesn't last very long, I think.

00:22:28.079 --> 00:22:32.720
You know, because I'm not, I think behind the scenes, I'm not as like fun as people think I am.

00:22:32.799 --> 00:22:37.440
I love to read, I love to do crafts, I love to sew, I love to be home, I have two cats.

00:22:37.519 --> 00:22:39.039
Like I'm very chill.

00:22:39.200 --> 00:22:41.839
So I'm not your typical porn star.

00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:42.880
Actually, that's not true.

00:22:43.119 --> 00:22:47.839
A lot of my friends in the industry are kind of the same way, very quiet people behind the scenes, you know.

00:22:48.160 --> 00:22:49.039
That's so surprising.

00:22:49.440 --> 00:22:49.599
Yeah.

00:22:50.240 --> 00:22:52.640
But then on camera, they're just vivacious and yeah.

00:22:53.119 --> 00:22:55.119
Well, that's the acting part of it, too, right?

00:22:55.359 --> 00:22:57.440
You know, I'm having sex in an airport.

00:22:57.599 --> 00:22:59.119
I'm like, I would never do that.

00:22:59.279 --> 00:23:02.000
Like, you know, but that's the fun of the fantasy of it all.

00:23:02.240 --> 00:23:02.640
Yeah.

00:23:03.119 --> 00:23:04.960
What is your type physically?

00:23:05.440 --> 00:23:06.880
I I don't have one.

00:23:07.039 --> 00:23:08.160
Truly, I don't have one.

00:23:08.240 --> 00:23:13.680
And I think it's because I do have a lot of experience, so I see what all types of people bring to the table.

00:23:13.920 --> 00:23:19.039
You know, race, age, and even body type, it's not important to me.

00:23:19.119 --> 00:23:25.039
You know, I I've dated bald guys, I've dated guys with hair, I've dated black guys, I've dated white guys, I've dated Asian guys.

00:23:25.119 --> 00:23:27.119
It's like, it just doesn't matter.

00:23:27.200 --> 00:23:28.160
It's who you are.

00:23:28.480 --> 00:23:30.480
The important question does size matter?

00:23:30.799 --> 00:23:35.519
Yeah, as I was like, obviously in your career it matters, but in your personal life doesn't matter.

00:23:35.839 --> 00:23:38.799
I say no, but there is a gauge, right?

00:23:38.960 --> 00:23:43.119
If you're too small, that's not something I'm willing to put up with.

00:23:43.200 --> 00:23:46.640
And if you're too big, that's also not something I'm willing to put up with.

00:23:46.720 --> 00:23:49.119
Because I always joke, that's clocking in for me.

00:23:49.279 --> 00:23:51.119
Like, I don't feel like going to work today.

00:23:51.279 --> 00:23:58.880
I I like a good, like normal sh medium, you know, like well, normal, normal is not the right word.

00:23:58.960 --> 00:24:04.880
That's yeah, but yes, average, a good average size is great, and even on the smaller side is great.

00:24:04.960 --> 00:24:06.880
Like I like easy.

00:24:07.119 --> 00:24:07.680
What is that saying?

00:24:07.759 --> 00:24:09.839
It's not the size of the prize, it's the motion of the ocean.

00:24:10.079 --> 00:24:10.960
Yes, exactly.

00:24:11.119 --> 00:24:12.240
No, that's so true.

00:24:12.400 --> 00:24:16.640
Because sometimes guys are like, you know, I'm I'm big, so you know, I got this.

00:24:16.799 --> 00:24:24.799
And I'm like, I highly doubt that because usually it's the guys that do have a lot to work with that aren't very good at what they do in my experience.

00:24:25.119 --> 00:24:28.000
It's kind of like it's kind of like we were talking about this earlier, too.

00:24:28.079 --> 00:24:38.480
Like when you're really pretty, you don't really have to develop much of a personality because you just get by on your looks, and it's like the same thing when you have a big dick, it you don't really need to learn how to use it that well because you just get bad with it.

00:24:38.720 --> 00:24:39.359
No, that's so true.

00:24:39.440 --> 00:24:40.480
And that reminded me too.

00:24:40.559 --> 00:24:54.319
Like, I growing up in like the Midwest and Salt Lake City and stuff, like I, you know, people are attractive, but in a in a different way, in a healthy way, in a in a little less uncool way, maybe more genuine, natural beauty kind of situation.

00:24:54.559 --> 00:25:01.200
Uh, when I moved to Scottsdale, everyone is gorgeous and has amazing style and is like perfect.

00:25:01.279 --> 00:25:07.119
It's very similar to growing up in Salt Lake, like perfection is very like uh it's a priority, you know.

00:25:07.279 --> 00:25:13.279
And so I think when I moved here, I've never seen such uh pretty stylish men.

00:25:13.440 --> 00:25:15.200
And I don't know what to do with that.

00:25:15.279 --> 00:25:17.839
I'm like, you're uh you're better looking than me.

00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:18.880
Like, hold on.

00:25:19.200 --> 00:25:20.240
No, no.

00:25:20.400 --> 00:25:25.279
So I think when you're talking about my type, it's like I want to be like the hot one in the relationship, you know?

00:25:25.680 --> 00:25:29.519
Like I I've always enjoyed when somebody looks over and they're like, why is she with him?

00:25:29.759 --> 00:25:29.839
Right.

00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:31.359
Like that's my entire yeah.

00:25:31.440 --> 00:25:32.319
I'm like, yeah, yes.

00:25:32.640 --> 00:25:34.880
So have you dated many Scotstyle guys?

00:25:35.279 --> 00:25:36.000
Just a few.

00:25:36.559 --> 00:25:37.200
Yeah, 2050.

00:25:37.359 --> 00:25:39.839
I just well, because like I said, I've only been here for like a year and a half.

00:25:40.079 --> 00:25:46.160
You know, my fans know I moved from the Midwest to be closer to work, but I didn't want to be in LA, so I thought this was a good happy medium.

00:25:46.400 --> 00:25:50.079
Um, and it's it's interesting.

00:25:51.759 --> 00:25:52.640
It's it's good.

00:25:52.720 --> 00:25:58.400
The one thing I have found is that there's a lot of transplants here in Scottsdale and in Phoenix from the Midwest.

00:25:58.480 --> 00:26:00.880
And so I like I like those people, I think.

00:26:01.039 --> 00:26:03.519
I think that's a a commonality that I've found.

00:26:03.680 --> 00:26:09.599
I haven't found many like native Arizona people that I have a lot in common with, and that's probably my own failings, you know.

00:26:09.920 --> 00:26:11.519
How are you meeting guys to date?

00:26:13.599 --> 00:26:14.000
No, no.

00:26:14.480 --> 00:26:16.240
So unfortunately, I am banned from all apps.

00:26:16.640 --> 00:26:21.920
The minute I start an account, it's like I get flagged immediately or reported, and that's okay.

00:26:22.000 --> 00:26:24.400
I mean, I think it's a function, it's obviously a function of what I do.

00:26:24.480 --> 00:26:25.359
That's pretty common.

00:26:25.680 --> 00:26:26.960
So that's not an option for me.

00:26:27.039 --> 00:26:30.880
A lot of it does come through my DMs and through my friends.

00:26:31.119 --> 00:26:36.720
You know, I like to date people that aren't complete strangers, otherwise, I take it really slow.

00:26:36.880 --> 00:26:38.880
And I think that's like frustrating for guys.

00:26:39.039 --> 00:26:44.640
Like, I'm you cannot come over to my house, you cannot pick me up, you I don't want to give you my phone number for like a while.

00:26:44.799 --> 00:26:50.960
Yeah, you know, because I think that's also kind of a problem with what I do, is a lot of guys see it as like a novelty.

00:26:51.279 --> 00:26:54.799
And I need to make sure we can like get past that so that you don't abuse that.

00:26:54.880 --> 00:26:59.359
Like, if I give you my number and you like put it out there, that would be devastating for me.

00:26:59.599 --> 00:27:01.279
So there's a lot of trust involved.

00:27:01.359 --> 00:27:05.440
And I uh, you know, people that I do let in pretty quickly, I always make them sign an NDA.

00:27:05.680 --> 00:27:06.480
Yeah, smart.

00:27:06.720 --> 00:27:06.880
Yeah.

00:27:07.119 --> 00:27:08.000
Do you have issues with that?00:27:08.079 --> 00:27:08.480


It's funny.00:27:08.559 --> 00:27:14.079


So I have a very good friend who he's a mayor of a very large city in the US.00:27:14.319 --> 00:27:23.680


And before he was elected, he was asking me, because he's single also, and he's like, you know, he's like, How would you feel if a guy asked you to sign an NDA?00:27:23.759 --> 00:27:25.680


And I was like, I would sign one, no problem.00:27:25.839 --> 00:27:27.200


And he, but that was his concern.00:27:27.359 --> 00:27:30.960


He was like, Be he's like, because my you know, my is it presumptuous?00:27:31.200 --> 00:27:33.759


Is it like, am I thinking too highly of myself?00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:44.079


Because his team was like, No, if you're gonna date, if if this is gonna happen and you're gonna be a public figure, anyone that you even want to go on one date with, you need to have them sign an NDA.00:27:44.240 --> 00:27:49.680


100% nowadays with social media and TikTok and the way that people just rant online, you I feel like you have to.00:27:50.240 --> 00:27:52.880


Yeah, not only that, but I always think about my family, you know.00:27:52.960 --> 00:27:56.720


That's they're not consenting to be under the same lens that I'm under.00:27:57.039 --> 00:28:05.599


So, you know, if you want to talk about my family, I need to know that you're not going to hurt them, you know, and I I need some legal recourse on that.00:28:05.680 --> 00:28:07.359


So and I feel like it's probably a good gauge.00:28:07.440 --> 00:28:12.079


Like if a guy refuses to sign an NDA or throws a fit over it, it's probably like the trash taken.00:28:12.559 --> 00:28:13.440


What are his intentions?00:28:13.599 --> 00:28:13.839


Yeah.00:28:14.079 --> 00:28:15.200


Yeah, what are his intentions?00:28:15.279 --> 00:28:16.559


But it's also what are my intentions?00:28:16.640 --> 00:28:21.519


And I think anytime I've asked someone to sign an NDA, there's kind of a scoff of like, dude, I would never hurt you.00:28:21.599 --> 00:28:23.279


I would never put your business out there.00:28:23.440 --> 00:28:24.640


And I'm like, thank you.00:28:24.799 --> 00:28:25.519


So sign it.00:28:25.680 --> 00:28:26.400


Yeah, exactly.00:28:26.640 --> 00:28:27.599


You know, and and they do.00:28:27.680 --> 00:28:28.880


I've never had anybody say no.00:28:28.960 --> 00:28:29.119


Yeah.00:28:29.279 --> 00:28:33.039


Um, and I've always offered, well, I'll sign one for you too if you want.00:28:33.119 --> 00:28:36.799


So because if anybody, I mean, you can rant online all you want, but I'm the one with a platform.00:28:37.119 --> 00:28:37.440


That's true.00:28:37.759 --> 00:28:40.880


So if you should be scared, you should probably be more scared of me.00:28:41.039 --> 00:28:41.200


Yeah.00:28:41.359 --> 00:28:44.079


But luckily, I keep all of my stuff private now.00:28:44.240 --> 00:28:50.960


I mean, I've I've had some things get out, and uh people rant that rant online, it says more about them, I feel, than it does about the person they're teaching about.00:28:51.519 --> 00:28:52.880


Yeah, no, it definitely does.00:28:52.960 --> 00:28:53.920


I just I don't know.00:28:54.319 --> 00:28:56.319


Have you ever walked out mid-date?00:28:57.599 --> 00:28:58.880


No, I'm too chicken for that.00:28:59.200 --> 00:28:59.920


I'm too chicken.00:29:00.240 --> 00:29:06.160


I I also am not afraid of like difficult conversations.00:29:06.319 --> 00:29:12.880


So I don't mind like if I don't agree with you or whatever, we can have like a difficult conversation, we can move past it, and then I'll just never see you again.00:29:13.039 --> 00:29:15.839


Yeah, you know, I don't and and yeah, and we can cut it short too.00:29:15.920 --> 00:29:21.920


You know, we don't need to be ordering dessert and going out to the movies after, but no, I've never what are you deal breakers?00:29:25.279 --> 00:29:33.839


I I I don't like unkind people, I don't like mean people, I don't like people that don't understand other points of view.00:29:34.079 --> 00:29:41.519


Um I don't like people that talk about politics too much, you know, especially politics affect my life directly with my work.00:29:41.680 --> 00:29:45.119


And so if you're not compassionate to that, that's just like an immediate no.00:29:45.440 --> 00:29:48.559


Um, I also can't stand people that don't think I'm funny.00:29:48.720 --> 00:29:50.720


Like I'm actually really funny, you know.00:29:50.799 --> 00:29:53.759


Like I don't know, I'm always like cracking jokes and I'm really sarcastic.00:29:53.920 --> 00:30:00.000


So if you're um like sensitive, if guys have like a big ego where they're like, What do you mean?00:30:00.079 --> 00:30:06.960


You know, I'm like, this is or if they don't get your jokes, like if they're too serious, they don't get the references, they don't get the jokes.00:30:07.119 --> 00:30:08.960


Yeah, it makes me feel lame.00:30:09.279 --> 00:30:11.680


I don't want to be with somebody that thinks I'm lame, you know.00:30:12.160 --> 00:30:13.920


That's the worst when you have to like explain your jokes.00:30:14.000 --> 00:30:16.400


Yeah, and they're like quiet, it's like crickets and you're trying to explain.00:30:16.720 --> 00:30:18.319


And you're like, uh, it was a joke.00:30:18.480 --> 00:30:20.480


Yeah, like now we both feel stupid.00:30:20.960 --> 00:30:21.200


Exactly.00:30:21.440 --> 00:30:22.480


Have you ever been cheated on?00:30:22.640 --> 00:30:23.039


Oh, yeah.00:30:23.279 --> 00:30:23.920


How did you find out?00:30:24.319 --> 00:30:26.720


That's like part of the human experience.00:30:27.039 --> 00:30:27.359


Yeah.00:30:27.680 --> 00:30:39.119


Um, I have a really good gut, and I remember I saw him leaving the house on the ring doorbell and walking over to the neighbor's house.00:30:39.440 --> 00:30:41.759


And I was like, What are you doing?00:30:42.000 --> 00:30:45.039


I woke up the next morning and was like, Did you walk over to the neighbor's house?00:30:45.279 --> 00:30:48.960


And he's like, No, no, and just gaslighted me.00:30:49.039 --> 00:30:50.960


And that was that was my first like experience with that.00:30:51.279 --> 00:30:52.400


Was your neighbor a hot female?00:30:52.559 --> 00:30:52.720


Yes.00:30:53.039 --> 00:30:54.319


Oh my god, he was sleeping with me.00:30:54.640 --> 00:30:57.920


And we didn't get along either, so it was like this double whammy.00:30:58.160 --> 00:31:02.559


But um, yeah, I remember being like, Oh, okay, yeah, I guess you didn't.00:31:02.720 --> 00:31:04.640


I can see it with my own eyes.00:31:04.720 --> 00:31:06.400


And I was like, Yeah, I guess you're right.00:31:06.480 --> 00:31:06.720


I did.00:31:06.960 --> 00:31:09.279


Like, I I will never understand why I was like, okay.00:31:09.359 --> 00:31:11.440


And then yeah, it came out that he was cheating on me with an idiot.00:31:11.599 --> 00:31:12.000


Oh my god.00:31:12.319 --> 00:31:13.440


Also, that's idiotic.00:31:13.519 --> 00:31:15.759


Like, I can't with the stupid.00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:16.480


So stupid.00:31:16.640 --> 00:31:20.960


I was like, you couldn't have walked out the back door without the ring door, but it was just like that.00:31:21.039 --> 00:31:23.680


It gave the whole thing gave me the ick because I was like, You're dumb.00:31:23.759 --> 00:31:25.119


You think I'm dumb, she's dumb.00:31:25.200 --> 00:31:26.400


I was like, burn the house to the ground.00:31:26.480 --> 00:31:27.119


I'm out of here.00:31:27.599 --> 00:31:27.759


Yeah.00:31:28.400 --> 00:31:29.359


Yeah, that was bad.00:31:29.599 --> 00:31:30.640


So, what are your hobbies?00:31:30.960 --> 00:31:35.920


You said you like to do crafts and yeah, I'm actually like a like a big nerd.00:31:36.000 --> 00:31:40.160


I think, you know, my Mormon Utah background is very domestic.00:31:40.319 --> 00:31:41.759


So I love to cook.00:31:41.920 --> 00:31:43.039


I love to sew.00:31:43.119 --> 00:31:45.359


I have a sewing machine, I'm constantly like making something.00:31:45.519 --> 00:31:46.960


I do all my own alterations.00:31:47.119 --> 00:31:47.759


Like wow.00:31:47.920 --> 00:31:52.000


Yeah, I did a lot of um homemade Christ Christmas gifts this year too.00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:54.559


So yeah, I'm just kind of a nerd.00:31:54.960 --> 00:31:56.799


Do you have any crazy first date stories?00:31:59.039 --> 00:32:00.960


First date stories?00:32:02.240 --> 00:32:02.960


I kind of have a big cat.00:32:03.200 --> 00:32:04.559


Oh, but you don't really date online, huh?00:32:05.440 --> 00:32:05.680


No.00:32:08.640 --> 00:32:18.559


No, I think because I'm so cautious about meeting people that I've never had an experience where they weren't who they said they were or they started saying crazy things.00:32:18.720 --> 00:32:21.680


Like I I'm pretty good at sussing that out beforehand.00:32:21.920 --> 00:32:25.440


I have had some crazy date stories.00:32:26.000 --> 00:32:29.599


Um I had gone out with this guy a few times.00:32:29.839 --> 00:32:38.160


I had recently broken up with an ex that I'd had for like a year, and I drive a Tesla, and you put you don't have a car key, you just like put the app on your phone, right?00:32:38.400 --> 00:32:40.160


So he had the app too.00:32:40.400 --> 00:32:42.400


Well, I forgot that he still had it.00:32:42.480 --> 00:32:44.559


Like I hadn't kicked him off of my extra.00:32:44.720 --> 00:32:47.279


And we're very yes, it's still connected to my car.00:32:47.519 --> 00:32:53.680


So me and the new guy are making out in the car, and my ex is watching it.00:32:53.759 --> 00:32:56.640


Oh, and he starts honking the horn of the car.00:32:56.799 --> 00:33:02.240


And I can't figure out when my car, I thought my car alarm was going off, and it's like the modes are switching in the car.00:33:02.319 --> 00:33:08.000


It's like sentry mode, and it's like doing things and it's honking and the trunk's opening, and I'm like, Oh my god, I think my car's gonna explode.00:33:08.079 --> 00:33:13.519


So we like hop out of the car, and then I realize I'm like, wait a second, he's watching us.00:33:13.680 --> 00:33:14.720


Yeah, it's creepy.00:33:14.880 --> 00:33:15.599


Yeah, that was pretty.00:33:15.920 --> 00:33:17.200


He was just mad and just bitter.00:33:17.279 --> 00:33:19.519


Like, it was petty, it was funny, really.00:33:19.599 --> 00:33:24.720


Yeah, you know, it wasn't like he he wasn't being like maliciously evil.00:33:24.799 --> 00:33:26.640


He was like being funny and annoying and rude.00:33:27.119 --> 00:33:30.960


Like that sounds like something that I would do to be like to like mess with somebody.00:33:31.119 --> 00:33:33.119


Yeah, like it was it was pretty funny.00:33:33.279 --> 00:33:36.559


But it it was just funny that it took me so long to figure out what was happening.00:33:36.640 --> 00:33:38.480


Like, I thought I had this horrible problem with my car.00:33:38.559 --> 00:33:40.160


So thank God, yeah.00:33:40.240 --> 00:33:45.519


And then to explain that to like all the news stories of the Tesla's like exploding and bursting into flames and stuff.00:33:46.559 --> 00:33:47.759


Is this how it starts?00:33:47.920 --> 00:33:50.720


Um I was like, okay, wait, this is like a major warning.00:33:50.880 --> 00:33:51.440


So yeah.00:33:51.920 --> 00:33:52.400


Are you ready for it?00:33:52.799 --> 00:33:53.359


I'm ready for it.00:33:53.519 --> 00:33:56.400


The Keep More Minute brought to you by Tactical Tax Strategies.00:33:56.559 --> 00:33:57.839


They help you keep more in your wallet.00:33:57.920 --> 00:34:00.480


We help you keep more in your relationship.00:34:00.799 --> 00:34:02.720


All right, so we've got a listener question.00:34:03.279 --> 00:34:11.119


Um says, I was recently on a first date with a guy when suddenly a story of his started to sound a little bit too familiar.00:34:11.440 --> 00:34:15.519


I realized he had dated a cousin of mine in the past.00:34:16.000 --> 00:34:22.960


I didn't mention and just stuck it out on a date, but now he wants to get together again and I'm hesitant.00:34:23.119 --> 00:34:23.920


What should I do?00:34:24.159 --> 00:34:25.920


No, no, there's plenty of people out there.00:34:26.480 --> 00:34:27.360


Don't do that.00:34:27.519 --> 00:34:28.000


Plenty of people.00:34:28.639 --> 00:34:29.679


Is she to her cousin?00:34:30.320 --> 00:34:30.559


You know?00:34:31.039 --> 00:34:36.239


Obviously, not close enough to where she ever met him at a family function, obviously.00:34:37.519 --> 00:34:38.079


I don't know.00:34:38.159 --> 00:34:42.320


I mean, if she was super into him, could she have a conversation with a cousin to see if I don't know, what do you mean?00:34:42.639 --> 00:34:42.880


Maybe.00:34:43.039 --> 00:34:43.440


I don't know.00:34:43.519 --> 00:34:44.320


I think I'm with you.00:34:44.480 --> 00:34:45.360


I think it'd be a no.00:34:45.440 --> 00:34:46.480


I think it'd be a no for me.00:34:46.559 --> 00:34:49.119


Yeah, it might be kind of weird and awkward and yeah.00:34:49.280 --> 00:34:51.599


Well, I I don't want anybody's sloppy seconds.00:34:51.679 --> 00:34:51.760


Yeah.00:34:51.920 --> 00:34:58.079


If you dated my friend or my sister, whatever, even for five minutes, it's like, well, you were into them, yeah, not me.00:34:58.320 --> 00:35:00.800


Like, I yeah, no, like there's plenty of people.00:35:00.960 --> 00:35:01.280


Yeah.00:35:01.519 --> 00:35:04.079


What a what a funny coincidence, but I think they should just laugh it off.00:35:04.159 --> 00:35:05.360


And I think so too.00:35:05.599 --> 00:35:11.440


I've only ever, there's only been one guy that I've ever dated that a friend has also dated, and it was you, remember?00:35:13.440 --> 00:35:13.920


Remember?00:35:14.079 --> 00:35:15.280


And it was so long ago.00:35:15.360 --> 00:35:17.360


That was in like 2013-ish.00:35:17.760 --> 00:35:19.039


It was so long ago.00:35:19.199 --> 00:35:23.760


And like it was fine, but I don't it wasn't serious with me only.00:35:24.079 --> 00:35:25.199


And it wasn't serious with me either.00:35:25.519 --> 00:35:25.679


Right.00:35:26.079 --> 00:35:28.800


But I don't think I would, I don't think I would go there.00:35:28.960 --> 00:35:36.079


I have this one friend, and I tell her all the time, I'm like, I have certain girlfriends that it is an absolute 100% no.00:35:36.400 --> 00:35:36.559


Yeah.00:35:36.719 --> 00:35:42.559


And one of my girlfriends, it's because the way I'm like, you're like a child with their toys.00:35:42.719 --> 00:35:48.400


Like you, you may be done with your toy, but you also don't want anyone else to have your toy, right?00:35:48.559 --> 00:35:51.760


And so it's just like it gets messy, I feel like I agree.00:35:52.000 --> 00:35:56.400


No matter what you do if you date someone that a close friend or a family member does.00:35:56.639 --> 00:36:01.280


I think it's a privilege to know people intimately, even just emotionally, intimately.00:36:01.519 --> 00:36:06.960


So it's like, wait, we all got that same privilege, which is very ironic for a porn start to say.00:36:07.199 --> 00:36:14.239


But I think what I'm saying is like emotionally, you know, like you wanted to get to know her, and then it's like, ah, you don't shoot where you eat.00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:15.199


Yeah, it's very true.00:36:15.440 --> 00:36:15.679


Sorry.00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:18.719


So we're gonna discuss these very interesting single facts.00:36:18.880 --> 00:36:27.679


So the three-month chemistry dip studies show that the initial honeymoon high fades around 90 days, which is why people start noticing red flags around the three-month mark.00:36:27.840 --> 00:36:32.800


I they do say that if you make it past three months, you're good to go, but most people do not make it past the three-month mark.00:36:32.880 --> 00:36:33.599


That's so interesting.00:36:33.760 --> 00:36:37.280


I haven't heard that, but like anecdotally, yes, that is true.00:36:37.599 --> 00:36:38.559


It was always that way with me.00:36:38.639 --> 00:36:39.760


Like when I was single in Scotland.00:36:39.920 --> 00:36:40.800


Well, it never lasted.00:36:40.880 --> 00:36:42.719


It was about three months that we ended things.00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:43.199


Always.00:36:43.360 --> 00:36:43.519


Yeah.00:36:43.760 --> 00:36:45.840


Unless it was one of my few serious relationships.00:36:46.239 --> 00:36:46.800


Now I know.00:36:47.280 --> 00:36:49.440


Texting compatibility is a real predictor.00:36:49.599 --> 00:36:55.920


Couples with mismatched texting styles, fast responders versus slow responders, are less likely to last longer than six months.00:36:56.320 --> 00:36:56.719


It's very true.00:36:56.960 --> 00:36:57.199


100%.00:36:57.440 --> 00:36:58.159


Oh, emoji emoji.00:36:58.320 --> 00:36:59.360


Six months, you mean two weeks.00:36:59.440 --> 00:36:59.519


Right?00:36:59.920 --> 00:37:01.840


Emoji users versus non-emoji users.00:37:02.079 --> 00:37:06.960


Well, like you aren't a big texter, but someone that loves to text will not work out with you.00:37:07.119 --> 00:37:07.519


No, it wouldn't.00:37:07.679 --> 00:37:08.400


That would drive me crazy.00:37:08.480 --> 00:37:08.639


Yeah.00:37:09.119 --> 00:37:13.760


I mean, I would throw in like if you love to FaceTime instead of text or whatever, that's fine.00:37:13.840 --> 00:37:17.599


But like you just have to have some sort of communication that like matches.00:37:17.920 --> 00:37:20.559


Are you do you like it when a guy texts you good morning every day?00:37:20.800 --> 00:37:21.280


No, no.00:37:21.599 --> 00:37:22.639


No, that's so cheesy.00:37:22.719 --> 00:37:23.199


Please don't.00:37:23.360 --> 00:37:23.920


Please don't.00:37:24.079 --> 00:37:25.679


My agent's calling me first thing in the morning.00:37:25.760 --> 00:37:26.719


I don't want to hear from you too.00:37:26.880 --> 00:37:28.480


Like that's hilarious.00:37:28.880 --> 00:37:29.199


You know.00:37:29.440 --> 00:37:29.679


Yeah.00:37:30.239 --> 00:37:32.960


Um, men fall in love faster, but women fall harder.00:37:33.119 --> 00:37:37.039


Resho research shows men say I love you first 70% of the time.00:37:37.199 --> 00:37:40.239


Women take longer but are more emotionally invested once they do commit.00:37:40.800 --> 00:37:50.159


Yeah, I can see that because I think I've heard too that men decide if they are gonna be with you long term, like right away, like within the first couple of dates.00:37:50.239 --> 00:37:50.480


They know.00:37:50.800 --> 00:37:51.280


They know, yeah.00:37:51.440 --> 00:37:51.599


Yeah.00:37:51.840 --> 00:37:52.320


Interesting.00:37:52.480 --> 00:37:52.719


Yeah.00:37:53.119 --> 00:37:54.719


Ghosting peaks on Sundays.00:37:54.800 --> 00:37:59.039


People are most likely to ghost or end it via text on Sunday evenings, aka the Sunday scary.00:38:01.679 --> 00:38:04.239


Sunday is also the busiest time for dating apps.00:38:04.480 --> 00:38:07.519


So what they end it with their partner, then they go back on the aftermath replacement.00:38:07.920 --> 00:38:08.079


Wow.00:38:08.239 --> 00:38:08.800


Isn't that crazy?00:38:09.039 --> 00:38:11.760


Ghosting is also most common in the first two weeks of dating.00:38:11.920 --> 00:38:15.199


Once you get past the two-week mark, the chances of ghosting drop dramatically.00:38:15.599 --> 00:38:18.320


So if he hasn't ghosted you and it's been over two weeks, time to celebrate.00:38:19.119 --> 00:38:19.760


I can see that.00:38:19.840 --> 00:38:20.000


Yeah.00:38:20.239 --> 00:38:22.639


First date impressions are usually wrong.00:38:22.880 --> 00:38:26.880


Research says we can't actually judge compatibility from a first date.00:38:27.039 --> 00:38:31.199


The traits that predict long-term success show up around date three to five.00:38:31.440 --> 00:38:31.840


Dang.00:38:32.000 --> 00:38:34.480


So they they do always say you should give it a couple dates.00:38:35.119 --> 00:38:40.239


I when I was single, I would only do one date, and if I wasn't interested, I would never give it a second or third chance.00:38:40.559 --> 00:38:41.840


No, yeah, I disagree with that.00:38:42.000 --> 00:38:42.800


What a waste of time.00:38:43.119 --> 00:38:46.559


If I if I know we're not compatible, I'm not gonna sit there and try to make it work.00:38:46.880 --> 00:38:58.960


And I think it, I think it depends too on whether you know you're not compatible or whether you feel like it's just like a best behavior or a first impression type of thing.00:38:59.119 --> 00:39:08.960


Like if they are guarded with their walls up, maybe, or they're not showing you the like it maybe is a little bit, oh, well, let's go on a couple more dates to see.00:39:09.360 --> 00:39:14.159


I think you can be unsure on a first date and still go on a couple dates.00:39:14.639 --> 00:39:16.159


First two, because there were so many first dates.00:39:16.239 --> 00:39:20.159


I was like, eh, I was like, not this, not that, but it was just vanilla.00:39:20.320 --> 00:39:24.559


Maybe had I give it given it a couple more dates, it would have blossomed, but I never gave it that chance.00:39:24.960 --> 00:39:26.320


No, that totally reminds me too.00:39:26.480 --> 00:39:28.000


Like, I'm very guarded on a first date.00:39:28.079 --> 00:39:31.199


You know, I'm like asking you to sign an NDA and like trying to suss you out.00:39:31.280 --> 00:39:34.480


Like, I think I probably am a terrible first dater now that I realize.00:39:34.800 --> 00:39:38.719


Because I remember a guy looking at me and saying, like, can you let me in?00:39:38.880 --> 00:39:39.599


Can you let me in?00:39:39.760 --> 00:39:41.679


And I was like, I don't know, we'll see.00:39:41.920 --> 00:39:46.159


It's like, wow, if he hadn't gone on more dates with me, then yeah.00:39:46.639 --> 00:39:47.199


Okay, I take it.00:39:47.440 --> 00:39:47.519


Yeah.00:39:47.840 --> 00:39:52.880


Because I dated a guy, I dated a guy, and after like the first two or three dates, I had to ask him.00:39:52.960 --> 00:39:55.599


I was like, Are you still like, are you nervous around me?00:39:55.760 --> 00:39:55.920


Yes.00:39:56.159 --> 00:39:59.760


Because I I like because I'm an energy person, like, and I'm like, I'm trying.00:40:00.320 --> 00:40:08.480


To read your energy, and it's really hard for me to read because I'm trying to figure out you know, like, is this going to work?00:40:08.880 --> 00:40:09.920


And he did, like, he did.00:40:10.000 --> 00:40:13.440


He was like, Yeah, he was like, I get really excited when I get to see you.00:40:13.519 --> 00:40:16.000


And he's like, So I am like, I am nervous around you.00:40:16.400 --> 00:40:22.000


And so it's like sometimes you have to sort of like get the walls to come down before you can.00:40:22.400 --> 00:40:23.519


All right, I'll give it a true.00:40:23.679 --> 00:40:25.199


I'll give everybody more of a chance, I guess.00:40:25.440 --> 00:40:25.599


Sorry.00:40:28.159 --> 00:40:30.639


Phone on the table equals lower attraction.00:40:30.800 --> 00:40:35.280


Just having a phone visible, even face down, makes dates report less connection and trust.00:40:36.320 --> 00:40:37.360


Face down is sucks.00:40:37.679 --> 00:40:38.159


She puts her phone on the phone.00:40:38.400 --> 00:40:38.960


Face down is sus.00:40:39.280 --> 00:40:42.320


No, I think face down is definitely worse than face up.00:40:42.719 --> 00:40:43.679


What are you trying to hide?00:40:43.840 --> 00:40:46.320


Like, why not why don't people just keep their phone off out of sight?00:40:46.400 --> 00:40:46.559


I know.00:40:46.719 --> 00:40:47.599


Out of sight, out of mind.00:40:47.760 --> 00:40:49.360


Oh, I'm so addicted to my phone, though.00:40:49.440 --> 00:40:52.559


It does not bother me if you have your phone at the table, on the table, whatever.00:40:52.719 --> 00:40:55.199


Yeah, I mean, I'm constantly taking pictures, texting people back.00:40:55.519 --> 00:40:55.760


That's true.00:40:55.840 --> 00:40:58.239


As an influencer, you kind of do have to have your phone out ready to go.00:40:58.480 --> 00:40:58.559


Yeah.00:40:58.719 --> 00:41:00.000


I mean, as long as you're not being rude.00:41:00.239 --> 00:41:05.599


As long as you're not interrupting someone's story to Yeah, I'll only say, Oh, hang on a second.00:41:05.760 --> 00:41:06.719


I gotta take care of this.00:41:07.039 --> 00:41:08.400


But yeah, I don't mind.00:41:08.559 --> 00:41:09.599


Yeah, if they have it.00:41:10.000 --> 00:41:12.719


Height filters remove 60% of potential matches.00:41:12.880 --> 00:41:18.559


Woman filtering for six foot plus eliminates more than half of the men, including many who are extremely compatible.00:41:18.719 --> 00:41:19.840


That's crazy, isn't it?00:41:20.000 --> 00:41:20.559


I hate that.00:41:20.639 --> 00:41:21.519


I love a short king.00:41:21.679 --> 00:41:21.840


Really?00:41:21.920 --> 00:41:22.559


You love a short king?00:41:22.800 --> 00:41:23.599


I love a short king.00:41:23.760 --> 00:41:24.000


Yes.00:41:24.159 --> 00:41:29.360


I 5'10 is my favorite height, which is not short, but I'm saying like 5'10 and under, right?00:41:29.519 --> 00:41:30.400


Like even if you're 5'5.00:41:30.719 --> 00:41:31.119


Why is that?00:41:31.280 --> 00:41:31.920


Just curious.00:41:32.239 --> 00:41:32.639


I don't know.00:41:32.719 --> 00:41:38.079


I think, well, I've dated a few athletes that were very tall and very big, and it didn't feel like the puzzle pieces fit together.00:41:38.159 --> 00:41:40.159


So it's a personal preference thing, number one.00:41:40.400 --> 00:41:41.280


And then I don't know.00:41:41.360 --> 00:41:43.599


I just I like being like eye level with my partner.00:41:43.679 --> 00:41:45.440


I like being able to hug you comfortably.00:41:45.599 --> 00:41:49.199


Like, you know, it just I like a little bit more of like a matchup situation.00:41:49.519 --> 00:41:50.480


How tall are you?00:41:50.719 --> 00:41:51.440


Five five.00:41:51.679 --> 00:41:51.840


Oh.00:41:52.159 --> 00:41:52.880


Without heels.00:41:53.119 --> 00:41:57.280


You are the first person I've met, maybe we've met, that likes a short king.00:41:57.679 --> 00:41:57.920


I do.00:41:58.159 --> 00:42:00.000


But 5'10, I think is the average.00:42:00.320 --> 00:42:00.800


It is, yeah.00:42:00.960 --> 00:42:01.519


It's not.00:42:01.760 --> 00:42:08.000


But but I think when people think of like dating apps and stuff, they always put in six foot apps and they think people like someone that's five seven.00:42:08.480 --> 00:42:09.280


Yeah, probably.00:42:09.840 --> 00:42:10.960


Yeah, that doesn't bother me.00:42:11.599 --> 00:42:11.760


Okay.00:42:11.920 --> 00:42:13.280


We might have a lot of matches for you.00:42:13.519 --> 00:42:14.719


Yeah, bring them on.00:42:15.599 --> 00:42:17.519


We match with people who look like us.00:42:17.599 --> 00:42:18.239


I've heard this before.00:42:18.880 --> 00:42:19.840


Yes, that's kind of creep.00:42:19.920 --> 00:42:21.599


Why do you want to date someone that looks like yourself?00:42:21.760 --> 00:42:22.320


I don't know.00:42:22.480 --> 00:42:23.599


Isn't it like what's it called?00:42:23.679 --> 00:42:24.800


Like the Mona Lisa effect?00:42:25.119 --> 00:42:25.199


Yeah.00:42:25.440 --> 00:42:26.639


It was like with the comfortability.00:42:27.360 --> 00:42:28.000


That was his face.00:42:28.079 --> 00:42:28.320


Yeah.00:42:28.400 --> 00:42:28.480


Yeah.00:42:28.719 --> 00:42:31.840


Isn't that it's weird to me, but is that statistically correct?00:42:32.079 --> 00:42:34.079


As long as I don't look like your mom or your sister, it's fine.00:42:34.320 --> 00:42:41.199


But that's what like you see pictures of couples, and they sometimes they look like brother and sister versus looking like weird.00:42:42.000 --> 00:42:45.679


People who have dogs in their profile picture get three times more matches.00:42:45.920 --> 00:42:46.400


That's it.00:42:46.880 --> 00:42:47.440


Only three?00:42:47.599 --> 00:42:49.280


Three times three times more matches, yeah.00:42:49.360 --> 00:42:50.239


So triple the amount.00:42:50.400 --> 00:43:00.480


Listen, if you can take care of a pet or an animal and you love them, and that's like your guy, like that's your little buddy, then I want to I want to be with that person who can like take care of something, you know.00:43:00.559 --> 00:43:03.519


So 100% if it's not your dog in the picture, that's sus.00:43:03.679 --> 00:43:04.000


Don't do that.00:43:04.159 --> 00:43:07.119


I was gonna say, even if you don't have a dog, Photoshop a puppin, you'll get more matches.00:43:08.320 --> 00:43:10.239


And then she's like, bring your dog along.00:43:10.719 --> 00:43:11.920


It's gonna die park.00:43:12.400 --> 00:43:13.840


You catch me, you don't have a dog.00:43:14.239 --> 00:43:15.519


See, yeah, that would be awful.00:43:15.599 --> 00:43:16.159


That's funny.00:43:16.400 --> 00:43:20.239


Most people are dating the same three personality types on repeat.00:43:20.320 --> 00:43:25.039


Psychologists call it recycling partners, choosing new people who feel familiar to old patterns.00:43:25.119 --> 00:43:25.840


It's very true.00:43:26.000 --> 00:43:27.199


My sister does that all the time.00:43:27.360 --> 00:43:30.079


She dates the same type over and over, even though it doesn't work.00:43:30.239 --> 00:43:30.400


Yeah.00:43:30.639 --> 00:43:31.920


You gotta get out of that pattern.00:43:32.079 --> 00:43:32.880


Why do people do that?00:43:33.280 --> 00:43:34.239


I guess it's comfortable.00:43:34.960 --> 00:43:35.599


Yeah, yeah.00:43:35.760 --> 00:43:38.079


We do like patterns as humans, I feel.00:43:38.320 --> 00:43:40.239


And I like predictability, you know.00:43:40.400 --> 00:43:48.000


Like I can even handle people that are a little bit volatile because like that's kind of my upbringing in my past relationships.00:43:48.079 --> 00:43:50.320


I know how to fight, like verbally, verbally.00:43:50.559 --> 00:43:51.679


So it's like, whatever.00:43:52.000 --> 00:43:52.800


But is that healthy?00:43:52.960 --> 00:43:59.119


No, yeah, and that's I think trauma too, like the trauma bonds people get, so then they get into their little patterns.00:43:59.679 --> 00:44:04.880


The last one singles rate their life satisfaction higher than divorced, dating, or even some married people.00:44:05.199 --> 00:44:07.119


Yeah, it's singles are the happiest.00:44:07.280 --> 00:44:07.760


Isn't that crazy?00:44:09.519 --> 00:44:10.000


Agreed.00:44:10.320 --> 00:44:12.639


So, where is your favorite place to go on a first date?00:44:12.880 --> 00:44:15.039


Are you a dinner person, like a nice restaurant?00:44:15.679 --> 00:44:16.960


Yeah, I I like dinner.00:44:17.039 --> 00:44:22.239


I don't like activities because then I have to focus on like, am I looking cool and cute while I'm bowling?00:44:22.559 --> 00:44:23.440


You're always in work mode.00:44:25.440 --> 00:44:26.719


Like, oh, am I cute enough?00:44:26.880 --> 00:44:27.840


Um, so I like dinner.00:44:28.000 --> 00:44:30.239


One, I love to eat, I love to drink.00:44:30.320 --> 00:44:32.320


So I want to see if our preferences are kind of the same.00:44:32.400 --> 00:44:38.320


I think that's good neutral territory to like make fun of somebody because they don't like cheese curds or whatever, you know, like that's that's easy.00:44:38.480 --> 00:44:40.559


Um, and I like to be able to talk a lot.00:44:40.719 --> 00:44:42.800


And so I don't want to go to the movies.00:44:43.119 --> 00:44:49.440


Um, and I also don't want to be trapped with someone if they're like, uh, let's go drive up the canyon or let's go on a hike.00:44:49.519 --> 00:44:52.159


I'm like, no, that's scary for me.00:44:52.320 --> 00:44:54.000


And then I'm more guarded than usual.00:44:54.079 --> 00:44:56.880


So a nice restaurant is a good first date.00:44:57.039 --> 00:44:57.199


Nice.00:44:57.360 --> 00:44:59.199


So we get to dress up, put our best foot forward.00:44:59.360 --> 00:44:59.599


Yeah.00:44:59.760 --> 00:45:03.199


Now it's time for the celebrity cup where we marinate in the juices of the celebrities.00:45:03.440 --> 00:45:07.679


Did you guys see that Paris Hilton came out and did an interview claiming she's self-made?00:45:07.920 --> 00:45:13.840


She claims that her family has never given her anything in her entire life and she is fully self-made.00:45:14.079 --> 00:45:17.360


Do you really think she'd have her billion-dollar company without the Hilton name?00:45:17.519 --> 00:45:18.719


Legitimately asking.00:45:18.960 --> 00:45:19.599


I do not think so.00:45:20.239 --> 00:45:21.119


You're kidding me.00:45:21.440 --> 00:45:21.679


Right?00:45:22.000 --> 00:45:22.639


She thinks that.00:45:22.960 --> 00:45:23.679


She does think that.00:45:23.760 --> 00:45:27.920


She came out saying she is self-made, she's worked hard to get herself everything she's gotten.00:45:28.159 --> 00:45:29.760


Her family have never helped her.00:45:29.920 --> 00:45:34.480


But I'm like, without the Hilton name and the Hilton hotel, would she really be where she is?00:45:34.719 --> 00:45:40.000


No, I'm shook because did we just for did she forget the early 2000s where all she did was party?00:45:40.239 --> 00:45:43.199


I mean, she literally has a perfume named Heiress, right?00:45:43.440 --> 00:45:44.320


Yeah, how dare you?00:45:44.559 --> 00:45:50.960


Yeah, it's kind of and yes, she is a hard worker, she does work, but I do not think she would have her billions without the Hilton name.00:45:51.119 --> 00:45:51.760


It's not self-made, no.00:45:51.920 --> 00:45:53.760


So that kind of annoyed me.00:45:53.920 --> 00:45:59.280


Anyways, um time to get to know you with Zoyo, sponsored by Zoyo, your neighborhood yogurt.00:45:59.440 --> 00:46:01.519


So we're gonna ask you some rapid fire questions.00:46:02.000 --> 00:46:05.119


Best or worst pickup line you've ever heard or that you've ever used.00:46:05.440 --> 00:46:06.079


Oh god.00:46:06.719 --> 00:46:08.719


Best pickup line is no pickup line.00:46:08.800 --> 00:46:09.920


Just uh hi, how are you?00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:11.199


You're pretty, I want to talk to you.00:46:11.280 --> 00:46:16.000


And worst pickup line is something that they don't execute correctly, you know?00:46:16.079 --> 00:46:18.400


Like, are you a pair of pants?00:46:18.480 --> 00:46:20.000


Because you'd look better on my floor.00:46:20.159 --> 00:46:22.239


And I'm just like, what?00:46:22.639 --> 00:46:23.519


You know, like no.00:46:23.840 --> 00:46:26.480


Does it work if a guy sends you a drink across from across the board?00:46:26.719 --> 00:46:29.119


No, that's no, because you can't like trust it.00:46:29.199 --> 00:46:33.119


Oh, that's you know, like I think we're just dating a zone is kind of dangerous.00:46:33.199 --> 00:46:36.880


And so I prefer if someone says, can I buy you a drink than just sending it?00:46:37.360 --> 00:46:38.960


Favorite body part on a partner?00:46:39.760 --> 00:46:44.880


I I like hands, honestly, hands on like chest, arms.00:46:45.039 --> 00:46:45.679


Yeah, yeah.00:46:46.320 --> 00:46:48.000


What gives you the ick?00:46:49.039 --> 00:46:50.079


So many things.00:46:50.320 --> 00:46:52.480


But yeah, mostly somebody that doesn't think I'm funny.00:46:52.800 --> 00:46:54.159


That's that's not gonna last.00:46:54.559 --> 00:46:56.239


Is watching porn considered cheating?00:46:56.480 --> 00:46:56.559


No.00:46:56.960 --> 00:46:57.599


God, no.00:46:58.320 --> 00:47:02.320


Before you're intimate, is it appropriate to ask your date how many people they've been with?00:47:03.039 --> 00:47:06.880


Um, if that matters to you, you need to reevaluate.00:47:07.039 --> 00:47:11.199


And I think when men ask that question, it comes from an insecure place.00:47:11.599 --> 00:47:15.920


Either they're judging you by your body count or judging themselves for their body count.00:47:16.079 --> 00:47:19.440


So I don't appreciate that question, obviously.00:47:20.400 --> 00:47:22.960


But um, is it acceptable to have sex on a first date?00:47:23.199 --> 00:47:23.679


Yeah, totally.00:47:24.639 --> 00:47:27.360


Should you disclose mental health issues early on in a relationship?00:47:27.679 --> 00:47:28.239


I think so.00:47:28.400 --> 00:47:34.880


I think it's not fair to involve people in a situation that they may not be equipped to handle, you know.00:47:35.440 --> 00:47:39.039


Do you have a crazy hidden talent or something about yourself not many people know?00:47:40.239 --> 00:47:40.960


Secret ones?00:47:41.039 --> 00:47:43.039


No, I think I put it all online at this point.00:47:43.360 --> 00:47:43.679


Yeah.00:47:43.840 --> 00:47:44.079


No.00:47:44.320 --> 00:47:45.440


No, no other talents.00:47:45.519 --> 00:47:46.800


Play the flute or I don't know.00:47:46.880 --> 00:47:47.760


No skin flute.00:47:48.079 --> 00:47:50.400


Play the f that definitely for sure.00:47:51.760 --> 00:47:52.000


Yeah.00:47:52.480 --> 00:47:52.880


I don't know.00:47:52.960 --> 00:47:53.840


I've kind of done it all.00:47:53.920 --> 00:47:56.400


Um, I can say my ABC is backwards really fast.00:47:56.480 --> 00:47:58.719


I always think that's kind of funny because I thought everybody could do that.00:47:58.960 --> 00:47:59.119


Really?00:47:59.280 --> 00:48:00.000


Oh interesting.00:48:00.079 --> 00:48:00.239


Do it.00:48:00.480 --> 00:48:04.159


Z Y X, W V U, T S R Q, P O N M L K, J H H G F E D, C B A.00:48:04.239 --> 00:48:06.320


And I guess when I'm back.00:48:06.960 --> 00:48:07.840


I thought it, I don't know.00:48:07.920 --> 00:48:08.800


It's just one of those things.00:48:08.880 --> 00:48:09.280


Yeah, I know.00:48:09.360 --> 00:48:10.800


Not everybody can do the FS.00:48:10.960 --> 00:48:11.199


Yeah, that's.00:48:11.360 --> 00:48:14.079


And last but not least, favorite sexual position and why.00:48:14.880 --> 00:48:17.920


Um missionary for the eye contact and the dirty talk.00:48:18.000 --> 00:48:18.800


That's my favorite.00:48:19.039 --> 00:48:19.920


Back to the porn.00:48:20.000 --> 00:48:21.599


Do you like watching porn?00:48:22.079 --> 00:48:23.199


Um, it depends.00:48:23.440 --> 00:48:26.079


I I know so many people in the industry.00:48:26.159 --> 00:48:27.199


I've worked with so many people.00:48:27.280 --> 00:48:29.760


It's hard for me to watch a porn of someone that I know.00:48:30.000 --> 00:48:30.079


Yeah.00:48:30.480 --> 00:48:32.320


Do you critique it too?00:48:32.880 --> 00:48:32.960


Yeah.00:48:33.280 --> 00:48:35.199


Because I'm like, hey, she's handling that really well.00:48:35.280 --> 00:48:36.320


I know she's hating it.00:48:36.480 --> 00:48:41.199


You know, like I I know things about people and I know, you know, things that I don't like myself.00:48:41.280 --> 00:48:44.400


So it's really hard for me to watch certain types of of porn.00:48:44.559 --> 00:48:51.519


Um, but I do really like Girl Girl, even though I perform Girl Girl and I'm kind of bi, but I'm not really gay.00:48:51.599 --> 00:48:59.360


So it's kind of funny, like that that turns me on the most, because I think it can be like the most gentle and intimate in a way, and that's kind of what I look for.00:48:59.679 --> 00:49:01.840


So is that your preferred type of porn to watch, The Girl Long?00:49:02.159 --> 00:49:02.559


Yeah, probably.00:49:03.039 --> 00:49:04.079


Have you ever dated a girl?00:49:04.880 --> 00:49:06.239


Uh no.00:49:06.480 --> 00:49:08.639


No, no, I don't think so.00:49:08.880 --> 00:49:14.159


I'm trying to think, like, you know, there's times where you're like, oh, we're gonna like go out, and then you just kind of end up friends.00:49:14.320 --> 00:49:15.519


So that's why I like hesitated.00:49:15.599 --> 00:49:20.639


I'm like, I don't think anybody that I've hung out with or gone out with would say that that was dating.00:49:20.800 --> 00:49:26.320


So has a studio or anyone ever asked you to do something that you're not comfortable with that you're that you say.00:49:28.159 --> 00:49:28.400


Yeah.00:49:28.719 --> 00:49:28.960


Yeah.00:49:29.039 --> 00:49:39.360


And I, you know, I don't feel comfortable sharing what that is, but I usually get my scripts or my ideas beforehand, like what the scenarios are gonna be, I mean, and I get to say yes or no.00:49:39.440 --> 00:49:43.920


And half the time, actually, probably 80% of the time, the company will change the script to make me comfortable.00:49:44.159 --> 00:49:46.320


The other 20% of the time, they just find somebody else.00:49:46.400 --> 00:49:47.519


So it's not that big a deal.00:49:47.760 --> 00:49:50.239


Did you have any other questions or anything you that you want to add or you want to?00:49:50.639 --> 00:49:51.519


No, I think that was good.00:49:51.679 --> 00:50:06.000


Do you have any men that that you date, not you know, not coworkers or whatever, but that are pushing or interested, or think that you'd be open to having more of like an open or a poly relationship, or is that something that you're open to accept?00:50:06.239 --> 00:50:07.679


No, it's kind of the opposite.00:50:07.840 --> 00:50:09.039


I would be comfortable with that.00:50:09.280 --> 00:50:09.519


You would.00:50:09.760 --> 00:50:16.480


But I think when men are dating me, and especially early on in a relationship, you should probably establish things before you open it up.00:50:16.559 --> 00:50:19.519


And I think that takes a lot of time, maybe years.00:50:19.840 --> 00:50:24.639


But I think, yeah, most men that I date, they're like, please don't, you know, fuck anybody else.00:50:24.800 --> 00:50:29.760


And I'm like, okay, like, you know, I mean, outside of work, I don't think it counts, so that's different.00:50:30.000 --> 00:50:32.559


But me, I'm I'm open about it, yeah.00:50:32.639 --> 00:50:33.440


So it doesn't bother me.00:50:33.519 --> 00:50:33.840


But yeah.00:50:34.159 --> 00:50:40.000


So you're open when you're in a relationship, you're open to bringing in other people and yeah, it just has to be right.00:50:40.079 --> 00:50:42.800


And I think that's it's so hard to find.00:50:43.119 --> 00:50:44.079


It's so hard to find.00:50:44.159 --> 00:50:47.360


And I think, you know, people love the idea of it, but I'm like, great, execute.00:50:47.760 --> 00:50:48.639


Go ahead and execute that.00:50:48.719 --> 00:50:49.920


Yeah, relationships open.00:50:50.239 --> 00:50:51.280


See if you can bring someone around.00:50:51.679 --> 00:50:52.400


It is actually, yeah.00:50:52.480 --> 00:50:53.599


Yeah, it is like in theory.00:50:54.239 --> 00:50:56.400


It sounds so great, but then to actually put it in the world.00:50:56.639 --> 00:50:58.960


So my advice is pay a professional.00:50:59.199 --> 00:50:59.519


Really?00:50:59.599 --> 00:51:00.400


Yeah, just saying.00:51:00.480 --> 00:51:00.639


Yep.00:51:00.960 --> 00:51:02.320


Takes all the weirdness out of it.00:51:02.559 --> 00:51:07.199


Because then they call those people unicorns where you're trying to find that one beautiful girl to come in.00:51:07.440 --> 00:51:14.800


So when I back in the day, I was a unicorn for a couple, and I didn't know that they were trying to have a baby.00:51:15.119 --> 00:51:22.960


And a few, like after a few times of like meeting with them and having fun, they were like, you know, you'd make a good surrogate.00:51:23.280 --> 00:51:24.559


And I was like, Yeah, we're done.00:51:24.639 --> 00:51:25.760


I'm never doing this again.00:51:25.840 --> 00:51:27.199


And I've never been a unicorn since.00:51:27.280 --> 00:51:30.159


I was like, wow, I did not see that right off the bat.00:51:30.800 --> 00:51:31.440


Isn't that crazy?00:51:31.760 --> 00:51:32.559


Like, you guys are nuts.00:51:32.800 --> 00:51:33.840


Like the snowballed really fast.00:51:34.000 --> 00:51:34.480


You're nuts.00:51:35.840 --> 00:51:36.159


Okay.00:51:36.800 --> 00:51:39.119


Well, thank you so much for joining us this week at the meat market.00:51:39.280 --> 00:51:40.239


And thank you so much, Melissa.00:51:40.320 --> 00:51:44.639


If you want to snag a date with Melissa, go to any of our social media platforms at Meat Market Podcast.00:51:44.800 --> 00:51:47.119


And thank you so much to our sponsor, Tactical Tax Strategies.00:51:47.199 --> 00:51:52.079


If you want to preserve your wealth and keep more of your own money in your wallet, you need to go to Tactical Tax Strategies.00:51:52.159 --> 00:51:54.239


We'll see you next week at the Meat Market.00:51:54.559 --> 00:51:55.039


Bye.00:51:55.679 --> 00:51:58.559


Oh my god, I just totally got catfished.00:51:58.639 --> 00:52:00.719


He looks absolutely nothing like his picture.00:52:00.960 --> 00:52:05.760


So I found out the guy that I've been dating is married with kids.00:52:05.920 --> 00:52:08.400


His wife just reached out to me.